My Husband say's I am only entiled to £30,000. Is he right?

Question

I left my husband nearly 2 years ago to live with another man. My daughter was 14 at the time. We agreed to leave sorting things out until she was 16 & finished school. She decided to stay at home with my husband. Now she is 16 he wants to sort finances out & pay me off. Our house is worth £250,000 & we have a £50,000 mortgage. I want £100,00 but he says's he has seen a solicter & I will only get £30,000. I don't have a job & he says's I should have payed maintenance for my daughter in the last 2 years because I live with someone who earns money. I think he's bluffing. He say's it's because of what Ive done! Is he right with any of this?

My husband had refused to sleep with me for 13 years which is why I left him. If I moved back in & then started proceeding's would it change anything?

Answer 1

Well, you're the absent parent, so you should have been paying maintenance whether you were shacked up with someone else or not. BUT I think it would be assessed on your income and not your partner's, although I could be wrong on that. Also if you were to get more money, you'd only have to pay it back to him as back pay.

Answer 2

you seem to have had a lot of judgemental comments posted here...i am not fully sure of the law...it partly depends whether it is english or scottish law as well. as far as paying for your daughter, maintenance is only calculated on your earnings and has nothing to do with your partners so if you havent been working then the maximum you would have had to pay thru the csa would be £5 dedufcted from your benefits. you have legal rights with regard to the property, even tho you have been away for 2 years, you will have contributed throughout your marriage, also you are entitled to furniture and posessions etc. please seek legal advice, you may be entitled to this free if you are unemployed. mediation may also help you both reach an amicable agreement which will save lots of lawyers fees, and ultimately be better for your relationship as a family ungood luck it.

Answer 3

Do you own the property jointly? Any agreement re mortgage payments over the last couple of years? It doesn't seem fair that you should get half of the house when he's been keeping the house and your daughter for that time, but I don't see how he's come to that figure. You should get some legal advice as well. The CAB would be a good place to start, see www.yell.com for your nearest branch.

Answer 4

wow theres a lot of bad advice here, i'm presuming your in the UK? he is bluffing, the CSA can only claim back pay if a case has been filed in the past, they cannot ask you to pay anything back before the date the claim was first filed. In the UK 50% of the equity in the property is the normal settlement regardless of blame, you really do not to get some proper legal advice or you will lose out on what your entitled to.

Answer 5

if u were the parent who was only gettin access and ur daughter was living full time with ur ex - her father, then u should of being paying maintance, even if u are not working at all, its ur ex right to have got maintance, sorry to say...

If ur name is on the house also, then ur intiled to half of the house, but if i was u. i would also minus around £15,000 for back maintance for ur daughter and her 2yrs under ur ex husband roof...

if ur just sorting out the finances now and nothin more then ur new partner income should not come into this at all, ur only sorting out what is in both ur names after the break up... but if ur ex is going after maintance, ur new partner income will come into play as ur lving with him hence half the bills are being paid by him but as i said maybe take few K out in support of maintance back dated to the date u moved out of the house....

u should get urself a solictor and go about sorting it all out that way and NOT HIS WAY.. he will only try make u think those things when ur intiled to half of the house and what ever else u both had in ur name when married...

wish u all the best of luck to u in this...

Answer 6

i understand what ur going through. you need to inform him that you r still the owner of the house. you never worked so how were you expected to pay. tell him hoe needs to pay at least 70,000 to you or u will take him to court as you can say you were living in stree and needed a break plus can he prove u were having an affair before, if not u r a winner

Answer 7

Sorry to tell you this Ladybird but he's absolutely right. I think you'll be lucky to get £30,000 in all honesty. If you pursue it I think you'll come out of this even worse. I'd take the money and run before he realises he's offering too much.
In fact if I'm really really honest I think you've got some front even asking for anything from him after what you did. Sorry but you did ask.

Answer 8

You need to go see a solicitor , this happened to my friend a couple of yrs ago , your husband is wrong you are entiled to half of the house , same goes for whats inside the house aswell. is your name is on the morgage papers .

Answer 9

yer see your own lawyer thats good advice...

i really think you should be paying maintenance, if dads have to why shouldnt mums...

only way to go is seek legal advice

ps.. i think hes right about the maintenance you really should be paying it. most ppl pay it up untill the child is 18. i know this as im pregnant with triplets and taking my ex to the cleaners when they are born.

Answer 10

Your husband is correct, but don't give up hope.. judges in divorce courts are not known for there common sense and you may even end up with everything.