I need a come-back for my mother-in-law.......?

Question

She INSISTS that sending my child (who has medical condition that makes him poop his pants several times a day 3-4 days out of 7. We are working on it, but the recovery period is detailed, extense & long!) Her reasoning is....1) Her son also pooped his pants once in a while & she sent him to school & he was fine! 2) Sending him later will only make it harder for him to adjust to school 3) Everyone gets teased at school, it's just part of life! 4) It will help him get over his MEDICAL condition. She has seen him only once fill his pants so full w/ mushy poo that he had to crawl to the bathroom so I could was him off in the tub! She has not bothered to look up the condition or learn about it or to come spend a day or week living with this condition. BTW, the condition is caused from holding it in for so long you become so backed up your colon gets stretched & you not only leak several times a day, but when you do finally "go" it's quite large & foul smelling! What can I

say to her when she comes at me with these comments! You guys are clever in P&S!!! I know you will give me some good ideas!!!!!

BTW, for now, I am home schooling and looking into Home Bound...

Answer 1

Wait a few years and she will have the same problem then you can laugh at her when she is crawling across the floor for the bathroom with a full load in her pants!

Answer 2

I don't know but this condition really worries me. Poor guy. He is seeing a specialist right? I just was concerned about the damage he is doing to his colon. The messing his pants is just a symptom. She needs to back off and realize that this is your son and your are doing what you think is best for him, whether she agrees with you or not. Bottom line it is not her decision. I would begin a homeschool program so that he will be on target with the other children when you are ready to enroll him in the public school system. Well that's a lie he will more than likely be ahead of the other children. Anyway, make sure he is continuing to get the ongoing medical attention he needs. Good luck.

Answer 3

The smile and nod is an age old shutter upper. Tell her you appreciate her input with a big smile on your face and then do what you were going to do anyway. She will try her darndest to interfere with your parenting pretty much forever, but YOU are the parent, not her, she has no say in how you raise your son but she's wanting to feel valued and listened to.
Where is arguing with her getting you? Nowhere.
So just smile and nod and keep your son out of school one more year. When she "confronts" you about it, keep your answer simple. Say "you know, we really considered all the options and we decided that this was best for him- So have you seen any good movies lately?"

Answer 4

Instead of trying to think of a clever come back to throw at her perhaps be adult about it and just ignore her. She has a right to her opinion. If she doesn't want to take the time to get the info on your son's condition perhaps you should get it for her. I can understand her concern about keeping him out of school and him falling behind. Just to keep her mouth closed about that, have you looked into home schooling? Making her understand about the condition shouldn't really be the issue, making her understand that he's your son and her grandchild is the issue. She shouldn't be trying to tell you how to raise your child. Talk to your son's doctor to see what he or she suggest. The only opinion that matters on when you child starts school is yours, your husband and the law. Have your husband talk to his mother about her voicing her opinion regarding your son.

Answer 5

Big Mama,
You've tried to explain the situation to her 'til you were blue in the face. The hard truth is, she's not gonna change her insensitive views. Just be as frank as possible w/ her, tell her she's had her say and expressed her views, but you are sticking to your guns. agree to disagree and tell her you would appreciate it if the two of you just didn't discuss it anymore, as it obviously only creates friction between the two of you. if she continues to bring it up, remind her you guys aren't discussing the topic anymore, if she persists, hang up the phone, tell her to go home. You should be the one holding the power, don't give it away to others. take back what is yours. That is your son, you have no other choice but to do right by him. NOONE else matters.

Answer 6

First of all do not let her push your "anger" button. Although she is an in-law she is still family with whom you will have to interact with for the rest of your life (or marriage at least). Tell her you appreciate her concern and ask her where she got her information since you want to study up on it yourself (she will be forced to admit it is only her opinion). Explain to her what you have learned from your own research and the advice received from the child's physician. Tell her that you realize her intentions are good however your husband (her son) and you are taking the advice of professionals and are ultimately responsible for the child's well being. If she continues ask your husband to speak with her. Do not be rude or insulting to her yourself.

Answer 7

I wouldn't even acknowledge your Mother-in-Law with a comeback.
I would just totally ignore her.
She has no idea, what your life is like.
You are more caring, more sensitive, more loving, more responsible, then she is.
You don't need her advice because you are a better Mother than she is.
Don't let anyone tell you how you should care or feel about your own child.
You do what is right for you and your child.
You are the only one that poor boy has.
To hell with everyone else.

Answer 8

my son has that condition and the Dr. put him on miralax, and he took that for 6 months and that straightened him out and told him to stay off dairy products. he now goes to the bathroom regularly and his stools are big but normal.( the Dr. gave him an enema before the treatment on miralax.) the miralax was taken after he got out of school for the day.the dr. said it was caused by him just ignoring the fact that he had to go to the bathroom and to put him on at night and in the morning , and sometimes when they hold it in for so long over a period of time he lost the sensation to go .

Answer 9

1) Her son isnt your son, and school is alot tougher now too...
2) Sending him later will save him from various **** pant nicknames
3) Everyone gets teased for little ****, imagine the teases for big ****
4) Going to school has nothing to do with a condition

Oh and remind her that in years when she is old and shitting her pants, you'll make sure to put her in a home "To help her get over it"

Answer 10

As you get older you may end up having the same problem. Is this how you want to be treated? Should we send you to public places where everyone can enjoy the sights, sounds, and smells of you defecating yourself? I'm sure they will be at least as nice as the children.
How does that phrase go...Children can be so cruel!!!