Why do I love you
But hate you the same
These human feelings
Cause nothing but pain
I hate everything that you do
I have a shattered heart
You have had your share of gossiping
Throwing me off to the side
I may have been the outcast
But I wasn't the one who lyed
I feel like I am responsible to take care of you
But what everyone doesn't realize is that I have burdens too
You took away my life
Those years I always will regret
You shoved your words into my brain
Until my temper shook
I thank you for making me tougher
I'll show you emotional pain
And this time you will tremble
And slowly go down in vain
Why do I love you
But hate you all the same
I think I have a choice to make
To live my life again
2007-08-15 16:55:24 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Wow, I really love this poem. I'm not sure what you have been through or if it is about your life or something you just made up, but you have certainly captured the feelings that I believe many people have had in many different situations/painful relationships. I agree with someone that said line 12 needs to be shortened. Maybe just say "but I have burdens too" & leave out the first part. Also (lyed) is misspelled...should be lied. This poem could be about a lot of things but for me it seems to speak of an abusive or maybe codependent relationship or about loving someone that is all wrong for you. For titles, maybe "love lost" or "shattered love" or "angry love" or "crazy love" "love in vain" "lost years" or focus on your last line "to live my life again" and call it "starting over" "trying to start over" "moving on" or "choices" I think all my titles are probably a bit elementary (I've never been a poet) but maybe you could use something. Hope this helps. Keep up the good work. I think you really have a talent that you should continue to pursue. Your poem really spoke to me and it felt strangely familiar to some less pleasant times of my life.
2007-08-15 18:00:55 · answer #1 · answered by Amy27 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smile. Don't sell yourself short: you are a talented writer. Your grammar isn't perfect, but you are brutally honest and very good at expressing your feelings. You let the world look into your bettered soul and asked for their opinions. Thank you for the honor. That took courage. You've managed to make me feel your pain. Not many of published poets can do that.
I have a great title for your poem: The aftermath of love... or The trials of love...
2007-08-15 18:01:39 · answer #2 · answered by ms.sophisticate 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Titles:
The Choice (I like this one the best)
Why Do I Love You, But Hate You the Same
Heartbroken
Love's Evils
The Evil of Love
2007-08-15 17:05:41 · answer #3 · answered by bayoubelle24 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your poem came from your heart. You see, your sister have being giving you a reason for you to express yourself from deep down. It is good that you take that out of you, even in a form of a poem. To hate is not good, it make you sick. learn to love her. I told you already. Jelousy is int between the two of you. Learn to love her, please. You will love her when you forgive her for all the things that she has done wrong to you. Do not feel bad because I am telling you this. It is for your own good and for the good of your sister and the rest of the family. Remember I already said to you. Read it again.
About your poem, sounds nice even that your sincerity is involve in it. You have talent. Shorten the line where you say: but. Think, and try to bring to your mind positive words and change the negative one for a positive one. You will feel much better in your daily day. Think about loving her, and write about it. It will make you feel good. The sun will shine over you. You are a beautiful person in the eyes of God, but your negative thoughts, underestimate you. Have dominium over them and you will have victory. Keep writing. It is a good idea. I love poems. I have my own poems.
I bet, you feel good for what you just wrote, glad because it is something that you did it. Think about God, when He created man and even you, how He feel about His own creation. He probably look at you and says: Oh, baby, you are my creation. Could you imagine the Lord looking at you, but He may say, oh, I do not want her to hate, but love as I love her. Think about it. When we love one another, our heart will be in peace, and even with the Lord God. Be blessed.
2007-08-16 05:43:42 · answer #4 · answered by Tititita 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is good but the line 12 is too long. try shortening it so it fits with the rest of the poem. I would take out the "but what" I like how it is dreary but the is hope at the end. good luck
2007-08-15 17:05:59 · answer #5 · answered by littleme836 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
20 things I love and hate about you
Challenge Me
Challenge
Love and Hate
2007-08-15 16:59:54 · answer #6 · answered by Butterfly 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"you don't have to be a famous writer to write a good poem"
- My 5th grade teacher.
this sounds kind of like a letter. I like it!
2007-08-15 17:19:29 · answer #7 · answered by ☼♫☆☺♡♥☺☆♫☼ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I actually understood it well, is it yours? Not bad if it is. Keep up the great work, and why didn't you post it in Poetry better than here?
2007-08-15 17:14:57 · answer #8 · answered by Me 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
>>Duality<<
I'm a spanish native speaker, so I can't tell you if it's good or not, in fact, even if it was written in spanish I'm not a knowledgeable of poetry.
2007-08-15 17:12:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
"Why Do I Love You"
gr8 poem, i rly liked it
rock on ;)
~anjali*
2007-08-15 17:06:29 · answer #10 · answered by alice 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋