What do you think about this poem I made?

Question

What about you,
Makes my knees buckle,
My jaw jitter,
And my palms ice-cold?

Is it your blue eyes,
As deep as the night sky,
Piercing through each soul it stares?

Or maybe it’s your lips,
So soft and smooth,
As though it’s never kissed another pair?

Could it be your hair,
That neat mess of hazelnut,
Uncombed yet perfectly placed?

Possibly your physique,
Gracefully sculpted by angels,
Like a tease to the heart of the single?

Beauty, what a shallow reason to love.

I love you for none of the above.

Not for your muscles that carry me off the sofa,
Neither for your hair that mimics your movement,
Nor for your lips that smile at me every day,
Or for your eyes that look at me so patiently---


But…

For carrying me off the sofa, to our bed,
For ruffling your hair to make me laugh,
For smiling at me every single day,
For giving me all the patience in the world.
And for giving me your undying love,
I love you.

I didn't want this to rhyme, I just wanted to write down how I felt.

Constructive criticism is welcome,

And so are compliments! :P

Hope you like it!

Much love <3

Answer 1

If only I could says "it's me",
I'd be a happy soul.
To have a lady write my praise,
And place me on a pole.
Elated though I'd have to be,
I'd have to be contrite.
And love you from the setting sun,
Until the morning's light.

Loved it, if ya can't tell... have a star

Answer 2

It conveys the message you wanted it to. Congrats to this special person it is about!

Answer 3

I really like it.It's very pretty. You are gifted.I wish i could write a poem like that.

Answer 4

It's awesome, congratulations.

Answer 5

i like it its really good

Answer 6

i love it, good job!