I don't think the man I'm with is attractive at all. We are really good friends, and we have a child together, but it really grosses me out to have sex with him. Sometimes it hurts, and sometimes it makes me want to gag. His penis is really small and strange looking. Should I just suck it up since he is supporting me and our son, or can I tell him to stop?
2007-08-15 11:31:08 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We live together, I'm a stay at home mom for our son, but we never got married.
2007-08-15 11:41:13 · update #1
This is too much information, but the reason it hurts is because he rams my really, really hard to try to get it in deeper. It's the outer ring that hurts, not deep inside.
2007-08-15 11:44:00 · update #2
I don't think it's funny that his penis is small. It's just that he's really fat so it looks smaller.
2007-08-15 11:47:23 · update #3
I guess I am using him. :-( At the very least I can give him awesome sex until our son is old enough that we can separate.
2007-08-15 11:50:55 · update #4
Well I ended up with him because he said he would have a child with me, and he's nice. I was raped, so I don't really enjoy sex much anyway. I would be so happy if he got a mistress!
2007-08-15 12:08:21 · update #5
Well, I don't see how I am being cruel, because he is getting a free live in maid, free childcare, and free awesome sex.
2007-08-15 12:47:58 · update #6
If he's supporting you and you want him to continue then you better get on your back and use your imagination!!!!
2007-08-15 11:40:37 · answer #1 · answered by YUMMY1 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that you leave him. Staying in a relationship any longer will only hurt more the longer you wait to break it off. I actually married a guy and was so disgusted by him after we got married he got so fat it hurt to open my legs. Im not that flexible. Anyways I was married to him for 4 years before I broke it off and we had 3 children together. Dont suck it up anymore he will have to support your son no matter what your decision may be. Honestly I would tell him to stop as well. bad advice on my part but I have to say it. I had an affair and I am currently living with my affair and we had a son together. I couldnt be more happy. Everyone has sexual needs and you really need to have your full filled. I'm not saying going out and cheat on him or anything. It was more of an example because I went through that same issue. Its better to end the relationship now then later.
2007-08-15 18:54:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dang! you're all messed up! Just tell him to stop. Everything you've just posted, tell him. How did you go from really good friends to having a child when and I quote,"His penis is really small and strange looking."?
Anyway...
Friendship is most important right? Then you shouldn't have a problem telling him how you feel about him.
Be prepared to get a job though!
To answer your question, A woman doesn't owe her man sex, Just like a man doesn't owe his woman sex.
However...
Don't be surprised when your significant other gets it somewhere else. But that doesn't apply to you though. You want him to climb on someone else, right? If not, why?
2007-08-15 18:59:37 · answer #3 · answered by Califiyah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a disgrace and a good part of the reason that so many women cannot find good men, women like you use and abuse the good ones and then they are no good for anyone who comes after you heartbreakers. You have a good man and a good father for your child. You should have realized that you were not attracted to him before you had a child. If you find him all that revolting, how and why did you have a child with him. I sure hope that he catches on to you and your cold hearted ways and boots you out, keep the kid but kick you to the curb and find the kind of woman a nice guy deserves.
2007-08-15 19:03:13 · answer #4 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're not married then just leave. If you don't want to have sex with him anymore just be honest. You can handle this. I normally tell people to deal with it but you have no commitment to him so do what you feel is right. I think you should at least try to be fair. Like say that you don't want to anymore but if he is willing to let you keep living there because he wants to be with the child too then stay. Tell him you are happy to let him have other relationships. They wouldn't be affairs if you two are just broken up and roomates.
2007-08-15 19:19:31 · answer #5 · answered by Jessie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to be with this man then why is he supporting you? Child support is one thing. Are you living together? You shouldn't feel like you owe anyone anything.
I guess sense you are playing house with this man then you do all that goes with it. Try some KY when having sex maybe it wont hurt so much. If you don't love him then get a job and support yourself.....
2007-08-15 18:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, I think you should stop having sex with him because nobody should ever feel forced into it. Take a rest from it to clear your mind. Then you need to have some communication with him about how you feel towards him sexually. Tell him you are uncomfortable, in pain and not into it. But do it politely and try to use gentle words. Then try to rebuild your connection with him simply by talking to him and share being intimate in non physical ways. I assume you once were attracted to this man to have a son with him and rely on his support. You don't owe him sex but you do owe him an explanation for your feelings. And if you after you've tried reconnecting with him through talking, you just don't have those feelings for him, don't keep him hanging on for nothing. You have to be honest and tell him directly.
2007-08-15 18:55:41 · answer #7 · answered by ThatGirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well now, join the "I hate my chubby hubby clubby" I'm sure there's a chapter near you. You are pathetic. to a man sex is MOST of the relationship. If I were he, I would say "put out or get out" He probably is frustrated because he doesn't know how to make it feel good to you, every time he tries he gets a "yuck" response, and so you both go on as tension grows and grows and your relationship sours more and more. For yourself, for your chubby hubby but most of all, at LEAST for your son won't you get some counseling.
2007-08-15 18:58:45 · answer #8 · answered by Gardner? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't go through life thinking you owe men sex. It is a mutual thing whereby both parties want to take part in pleasuring each other, because they love one another and if one doesn't want sex, then the other partner should respect that. Why are you still with him when you feel the way you do?.
2007-08-15 18:43:41 · answer #9 · answered by Live_For_Today 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you have a child with someone you're not attracted to?
Personally I think in any relationship you do owe a reasonable amount of sex to each other. That's my opinion and it doesn't apply to all people.
2007-08-15 23:48:34 · answer #10 · answered by misstsukino 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
partners are obligated to share all form of intimacies with their loved ones. However, it seems there are deeper issues including mixed or undealt with feelings regarding your rape, your sexuality in general, his lovemaking "skills" or lack thereof, and I would suspect other concerns within your relationship that flow over into the sex arena. I would communicate with your lover tell them where you are emotionally and physically. In the end you need to determine what you truly want out of this relationship...just a sperm donor? a companion? or a fulfilling holistic relationship with this person? leave no stone unturned.
2007-08-15 19:33:22 · answer #11 · answered by bluesbrother74 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋