Why do men.....?

Question

get so busy and engrossed in thier pursuits that they forget thier realationships?
Most women still remember thier realationships even when pursuing other stuff...
what's the best way to deal when men do this?

I don't mean to generalize and in truth I don't know enough men to say "all" what I'm asking is why would a man do that ? And how best to deal with it?

Rico: No, I'm not.

Answer 1

Letting him know occasionally that you support his endeavors can help, and asking for support for your own. Construct a teamwork-oriented relationship. Divvying up the responsibilities into distinct, competing interests and desires leads helps neither of you to know the kind of trials and tribulations that the other one goes through.
___Mutual support and trust don't come from suddenly demanding that things change, but from the steady growth of two persons' giving and getting help from one another. And trust requires risk and some willlingness to see if another person is trying to help out.
___Let him know that you're not getting enough interpersonal time together, and remind him of your support of him when you're doing something for him, without being a nickel-&-dime emotional mercenary about it. Gradually make him aware of the support he gets from you, and how it contributes to his ambitions, even though he might be pursuing them while away from you. Ask for some equivalent considerations. And show your appreciation for what he does for you, including the things you might otherwise take for granted. Understand his life and his troubles, so you can see why he might be too exhausted to want to go out all the time. Making it easier to go out, by picking easier activities, might help, too (not too many social events with your family, and not too many socially-fraught parties). Try to find interests that you share, and ask him to do the same. Both of you should be willing to try new things, and ato throttle back on any obsessive interests that aren't shared.
___When both people can move toward the middle, instead of one claiming the moral high ground, even the evolution of a relationship into something more mutually supportive can become a shared activity.
___It can really help to understand in a sympathetic manner, why he might be less motivated to do relationship things, just as you want him to understand, in a sympathetic manner, why your priorities might be different from his.
___There are pitfalls along the way, though, and not all relationships can survive the transition to a real partnership.

Answer 2

most men do still remember thier relationships even when pursuing other stuff and not all women do. its an unfair generalization to say all men do this or all women act this way. we all think for our selves.

if your partenor is ignoring you tell them if they keep the same bad habbits leave them.

its important to find a partenor like you some. people like to lead seperate lives and only get together at night whereas, some people like to always be near thier partenor. basicly you just have to find someone who wants what you want

Answer 3

Wilie D: Your answer is very enchanting and any second now cosmo will be knocking on your door with a job offer. But here's my 2 cents. Men love to have lives and women do too. You are right that when some people (men and women) have a relationship and feel secure in it, they tend to take it for granted. It only happens if the other partner tolerates it. What you fail to mention is what happens down the road. The partner who is being taken for granted usually finds someone else who will value them and thus the guy goes from football, golf etc to hunting for nookie again. And women can't hold out because they are afraid the guy is going to cheat on them or leave them? I don't know what part of the world you live in but i live in a world where men are as abundant as sand on the beach. If one ignores me, fine, i find another. Why would any woman hang on to a guy who takes them for granted?
PS: Your grandpa may have been a stud with the women in his time but he will not survive dating in the 19th century and neither would you if you live by those ideas about women

Answer 4

Depends on the pursuit but I blame Testosterone. It feels like a feedback loop, the effort you put in the more you get driven to keep going. Done enough it becomes an entertaining game of juggling components and its so darn distracting that we get annoyed when we have to stop and switch focus.... now if only men could make Women their pursuit/hobby then we could see some common ground between the sex's !!!!

Answer 5

They don't forget them, they were never that important to them.

Do you really think a man who 14 hours a day working will be able to cut back to 8 hours so he can spent more time with you?

Answer 6

This is an important question to ask and trait to watch for signs of before committing to a deeper relationship.

Answer 7

Because women tend to others and put themselves last and they consider their man as part of self and he is also last. He may or may not understand this. But consequently he puts himself first and she does or does not notice because she is last and so is he. And the relationships suffer.

Answer 8

do the same to him-conviniently forget about meeting him citing work or a meeting with friends etc- try to do exactly what bugs you about him- to him- and slowly train him!often its not that they forget- its just that they are not made to multitask emotionally- that is skip between emotionally varying jobs with ease. physically and mechanically they can multitask well.a woman may attend a board meeting, while answering a phone from her kid asking about something,then continue with work, while planing whats for dinner etc.

Answer 9

Because once we are in a steady relationship (with regular amounts of sex) we move on to other things.

It's simple...a man without a woman (or at least a regular hook-up) will skip out on drinking with his buddies, skip out on the big ski trip planned for months, skip out on anything if he even thinks getting nookie will be result of skipping out.

Once he's hooked-up on a regular basis it's back to golf, watching football, back to being a workaholic...whatever.

It's why in certain jungle tribes in the South Pacific the men all live in one part of the village and the women have their own huts. The guys only go to the women's huts for one thing...otherwise, they're out hunting monkeys and doing war dances.

And..the beauty of it is women can't hold out on the nookie for too long even if your man isn't doing what you want him to do because if you hold out too long you will get all paranoid that he's going to cheat or leave you for good...so either way, we're getting what we want.

The bottom line is we have better ways to spend our time than by wooing women....or as grandpa used to say..."You don't hunt for meat that's already in the freezer!"

Answer 10

Any question that starts off with 'Why do men....' or 'Why do women...' automatically tells me something about the person that wrote it. You are generalizing 'all' men. You should be asking 'Why do I seem to attract men that...'

I can't imagine why you think that 'all men' would do this. Maybe it's time to look in the mirror.....