I feel horrible. I seriously don't know what is wrong with me. (I'm young but that's not a good excuse) I love him a lot but I still do it. This is the 2nd time he has found out. It seems like this is it! I'm really upset at myself. What should/can I do?
2007-08-14 17:17:05 · 19 answers · asked by Dannii n OC 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
It sounds like you have low self-esteem. Maybe you never had people pay much attention to you when you were younger,and now you want as much attention as you can get.
I would say that your boyfriend is better off without you for now. You need to stay by yourself and work on yourself. Try to become a better person, so that when you do get back into a relationship you are not slowly tearing the other person down by cheating on them.
2007-08-14 18:16:48 · answer #1 · answered by mia w 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sit down with your partner and explain the problem you are having. If he loves you, he will help work through this with you. There are a lot of options the two of you can work out, and making you feel guilty & horrible doesn't have to be one of them; since that approach isn't working anyway. For example, if the both of you see love and sex as two separate things, ask your partner if he would consider an open relationship. It would allow you both to have sex outside your relationship from time to time, but you both would return home every night to each other because you only love each other intimately. Or perhaps a ménage à trois might be a good compromise. If anything, talk it out and create a plan together with clear details as to what are the boundaries you both agree to follow.
2007-08-15 00:49:42 · answer #2 · answered by C-Bag 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you need to take a mental step back. Maybe what you are calling 'love' is really just security. Cheaters cheat because they are missing something, and it is never about the person they are cheating on.
You owe it to your bf to be upfront and honest with yourself.
And if he's finding out, you are being even more selfish. The least you can do is try to spare his feelings as much as possible and quit relieving your guilty conscience by letting him find you out.
If you can't be monogamous, you shouldn't be in a relationship, period.
2007-08-15 02:42:43 · answer #3 · answered by GirlinSac 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that i could not really think of any advice, but i think it just your habit, and it unbreakable as long if you keep going like that, you must take risk in your negative side able to have benefit to your positive side.
2007-08-15 00:21:21 · answer #4 · answered by Nam D. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People who cheat aren't ready for committed relationships. Apparently, your solution is to not be in a committed relationship.
2007-08-15 00:21:32 · answer #5 · answered by Buying is Voting 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
try to think of the others persons feelings.
since your young take your time in having a serious relationship
2007-08-15 00:34:09 · answer #6 · answered by teresa o 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
jeez, chill out. we all have urges that we have to control. i mean if you're the kind of person that likes to be tied down then break up with the guy and be free. otherwise, it's not healthy at all to keep doing this to him.
2007-08-15 00:25:51 · answer #7 · answered by auz 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should re-evaluate things.
If you really loved him, you would have no urge to cheat.
2007-08-15 00:39:01 · answer #8 · answered by danksprite420 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Monogamy is rare amongst gay men, especially. Don't beat yourself up over this, it's par for the course in the "lifestyle"!
2007-08-15 03:13:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
stop committing to one person until you're ready to settle down
OR
find someone who is cool with an open relationship
2007-08-15 00:31:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋