how can i love myself?

Question

I know this is wrong..your suppose to love yourself . But i can find a flaw in every part of my body from my head to my toe. I want surgeries to make me look perfect. I hate my body and i hate everything about me. please dont give me rude answers just good advice would be nice. I am totally insecure and need to gain my self confidence. how can i do this? how can i just love me for me?
btw...i have a 9 month year old baby, and the father just left us 2 months ago, i was with him for 4 years...could this be the reason why i feel so insecure?

Answer 1

YES, IT COULD BE. AND YOUR HORMONES FROM HAVING A BABY. WE ALL HATE SOMETHING ABOUT OUR BODIES EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US. TRY TO TALK TO YOUR DR. AND SEE ABOUT GETTING COUNSELING. IT WILL HELP YOU DEAL WITH THESE EMOTIONS YOU ARE HAVING. AND ANY GUY WHO WOULD LEAVE AFTER HAVING A BABY ISN'T WORTH THE TIME OF DAY. YOU ARE DEALING WITH A LOT RIGHT NOW SO TALK TO A COUNSELOR. IT WILL GET YOU FEELING BETTER YOU AND YOUR BABY DESERVE IT . GOOD LUCK I HOPE I HELPED

Answer 2

You are insecure as you are going through a very stressful situation. It will heal with time so don't over-react. First get someone to talk to ( ie family,friend, ..etc.) and then start to work-out regularly. Exercises is great for building confidence. After that try some new sports. Also work on your spiritual side - meditation, yoga..etc. Also keep a log of your negative thoughts and substitute with positive. Also once you get over this situation you will be confident again. You need to ride the downs in life to build self confidence. I am super confident but i have been through crazy downs and once you ride it through you know you can handle anything in life. I was once stuck in indian alone ( long story) but managed to survive and get back home. Add small new challenges to your life daily and build it up.


Lastly - it is not the cover of the book but what is inside that counts. Work on your inside and soon you will be much happier then surgeries trying to please others. Each human has their own beautiful side and I hate people try to look
like others. What makes that person more special then you?


Good luck

Answer 3

First you are beautiful! Look at your child and see the reflection of love and that will help. Beauty comes from within and nowhere else. Boys leave because they have their own insecurities to deal with as parents not because of what the woman does or looks like. If he loved you and his child he would fall in love everyday when he opened his eyes all over again. Please believe when I say it isn't your fault. It doesn't matter if you have the body of what some call a perfect 10 or one of not such a perfect 10. He was going to leave regardless because of himself not you. I am 5'5" weigh now 138 and he still left. Not for any other reason but himself.
If you pray god will answer but only when it is time for you to have the answer.
Look at your child daily and realize what god has given you and you will learn to love yourself. Look at the beauty you possess inside that you brought fourth into this world you will see it then. Smile when you look in the mirror you deserve that and so does your child. Get up in the morning and start your day anew. Every time you start to feel down on yourself left that beautiful miracle up and thank god for your blessings as they are.
Don't let this guy affect you negatively you deserve better. Let him see you hold your head up and know that you are special.
with love and god bless

Answer 4

One thing you should know, you are BORN as A WINNER, you know why? If you study biology, you are here in this WORLD because YOU are the fastest and the best as a sperm, you are a winner from millions of sperm. So please be proud of YOU. YOU don't need a surgery, explore yourself what you can do to this world. That's the beauty, physical beauty cannot last forever BUT INNER BEAUTY is FOREVER. Do you know Mother Theresa? Is she physical beauty? NO, but her HEART is so SINCERE and that's the BEAUTY. I hope this would motivate you. START with LOVE YOURSELF and you will see all the miracle inside YOU.
BE TOUGH, don't DEPEND on others, for your husband problem, you can watch a very good film by a mother with three children, I forget the name, by Julia Robert. That's explaining how she survived. Email me if you have something to talk privately. [e-mail] or YM . I'll do my best to help YOU

Answer 5

I would talk to someone about this it might make you gain confidence in yourself and be a happier person. Please dont get the surgeries. You will only want more and not to scare you but you might end up like micheal jackson. What might help if you could find someone who loves you for who you are. Or just say i love myself and think happy thoughts . I really don't think the husband has anything to do with the insecurity. only you can make yourself happy. Spend time with your kid and you will be alright. I promise.

Answer 6

Well sure honey...you feel insecure because of the situation...plus your hormones from pregnancy are not settled down...you are a new mom...all life changing events...Be nice to yourself and give you self a brake.

Your total world is different...it takes time to get use to such change...each day remember to remind yourself..."I am a person of worth" because you are...things will settle down for you in time...it will get better

Forget surgeries for now...because truly, what is perfect??? Isn't it a mental concept and each persons idea of perfect will be different???

Take care

Answer 7

I felt this way so many times in my life. It is time for you to start over. Self confidence can help you take a charge of your life. No surgeries can give you that. You have to find it inside of you. Change your life for the best. You sound a little bit bored. Life is beautiful and exciting. Enjoy your baby while he/she is little. I do everything it takes to be strong enough to raise my child. I gain respect and appreciation to myself and that how I grow my self confidence that brings me more opportunities in different aspects of my life. Believe me nothing and nobody can make you happy, but yourself.

Answer 8

I can relate. If what everyone above has said doesn't work for you, you may consider seeing a therapist. I have a similar problem with hating eveything about my body and my doctor really helps me to figure out why I feel this way and what I can do to change it. Good luck. I hope that you can find something that works for you because I know that what you're going through sucks and just makes you feel awful.

Answer 9

You are suffering from self centered fear. You are too worried about what you look like. You are probably too worried about what you think other people think of you. Self acceptance is part of the answer, I am okay today, just like I am. It is none of my business what you think of me, it is my business what I know is true about me, to thine own self be true.

You are too into yourself, get out and do something for someone else, without expecting anything in return. Volunteer at a hospital or an old folks home. Treat others as you want to be treated, be kind, giving, caring, patient, tolerant, forgiving, loving, quick to laugh and slow to anger. You will like yourself and others will naturally like you too. If someone doesn't like you, leave them behind you don't need them anyway.

Answer 10

It IS the reason why you are so insecure. My sister went through the same things. Was with a married to a man for 4years- had a baby.. and he left her when the baby was 2 months old.

You should seek counseling. It helps.