what happened to our society?

Question

Why is it everything is a quick fix with a phone call to a lawyer??? Why is it that we can sue everyone just because it doesn't suit us. Divorce is way overrated and people don't want to work at their problems anymore, look at most of our parents, mine have been married for 40 years, and they have had their issues but they don't "give up" like most people do now. It's disheartening anymore to hear of the divorce rate any more, people we need to think b4 we act and get married.
Divorcees are giving us all bad names, i know there's execeptions to every rule , but it's crazy anymore

Answer 1

It's that people in general do not take responsibility for their actions. I'm not talking about just divorce here, but don't you think this all started when Political correctness became big, when accepting anything and everything became 'in'? There used to be only a few reasons for a divorce - abuse and adultery. Now people get divorced because 'passion has died in their marriage' (hmmm, people are supposed to WORK at their relationship - what a concept). And people sue others because they can't see their own mistakes (e.g. suing McDonald's for hot coffee, or chainsmokers suing tobacco companies, etc.) So maybe the answer to your question is greed, laziness, irresponsiblity. When we figure out how to turn those things around, things will change. I think it starts with me. Wish more people agreed.

Answer 2

I agree, society is really different than when I was a kid. Maybe it is because family values have changed so much and we are living in a "quick fix" society now. Things were so easy a few decades ago. We were accountable for our actions, we didn't sit in front of the TV like the kids do now, we didn't have the video games. We had chores to do and we did them without question. Then came along the activists, Dr. Spock who told us not to spank our children and the Children Protective services who would take the kids away if we did. The fast food places where we all gained weight and became an obese society instead of mom's home cooking. The TV shows showing more violence and sex rather than the good old fashionied shows like "I Love Lucy" and "Father knows Best", etc. As far as marriage and divorce, kids jump into marriage too fast, girls are having babies at too young an age so my solution would be about the marriage/divorce thing.... Marriage licenses should cost much more say $5,000 and divorce should be easy. You would think twice about marriage if you had to pay a large sum to marry in the first place. Mom's nowadays work rather than stay home with the kids, it is not their fault, it is hard to run a household with only on salary. We need to get back to basics and try to turn this around.

Answer 3

People used to stay together even if they were *miserable* because in those days, women had few options other than getting married. It's not a matter of giving up. People are not monogamous by nature. Women have options these days, and remaining in a bad marriage is not one they're choosing.

As for the litigation issue, there are ways to prevent frivolous lawsuits. It's just that your legislators don't really want to prevent them. Thank your government and the apathy and ignorance of the voting public for that.

People don't work at problems any more because they don't know how to. Their parents didn't teach them how to deal with problems. Their parents did everything for them, so they learned nothing, and now they are floundering.
Unfortunately, there's no fix for that, except life experience.

If you want to solve the divorce problem, you need to make it a whole lot harder to get married in the first place.
Then only couples who are truly committed to each other will marry.

And for the poster who said fidelity wasn't a big issue in older times...
Yes, it was. It was simply tolerated by women who had no other choice.
If the women were the ones cheating, that often ended in divorce...or violence.

Answer 4

I agree. I am seeing a trend to marry later in life out west tho.
And it seems that their generation is generally not as mature
as I was at the same age. But the same for my parents gen-
eration. They were older looking and more mature in highschool than I was at that age and naive about life.
I think that those who do marry young now, are maybe more
impulsive, and don't really think about the years of committ-
ment ahead. And at the first skirmish, they start to back peddle and think they've made a big mistake. Rather than
disgussing and trying to work out their problems. It is easier
for them to avoid issues and run away to the divorce atty.
My husband and I have been married forever it seems LOL.
We've had more downs than ups, just do to lifes unexpected
curves and trips uphill and then crashing down into valleys
of trials and tribulations. We've raised to children and have
grandchildren and we're going on our 45th year together. A
major milestone for sure, that we s hould be endurance
awards for in this day and age LOL.
And the strangest thing is, is that we were engaged a
week after meeting, and married the following week later. We
were both in the service, and he had orders to go overseas.
So we agreed to marry before he left rather than wait and
see when he returned. We decided we were soulmates tho and would always be together. So we took the plunge early.

Answer 5

Just because divorce rates were lower in the old days doesn't mean most marriages were happy. You think just because people stayed together no matter what, that they must really have worked at their marriages. Not necessarily true. They just didn't talk about it. Physical abuse was turned a blind eye at, and if you and your husband had problems, you kept it to yourself. Now, we have evolved somewhat and we know that abuse of any kind is wrong, and we know that life is too short to be stuck in a dead-end relationship when there are so many people out there just looking for the right one, and it isn't healthy to be in a relationship that is making you miserable, so when things go wrong, instead of doing what our grandmothers did and pretend everything is lovely, we feel confident enough to step forward and say something's not right and I'm not going to live like this. Talk to elderly people. I used to work in nursing homes. Alot of marriages back then were abusive, neglectful, lonely, and painful, just like some of them are today, only back then, you stayed in it and kept your mouth shut. Now, we know better.

Answer 6

Next time you are married to someone who is beating the crap out of you remember your words. I know people who were married 40 years ago and they divorced. There WERE divorces in the 50s 60s and 70s...I grew up in the 50s and 60s. One major difference was that it was acceptable for a man to beat the crap out of his wife and kids. It is no longer socially acceptable. But when you're the one getting the beating remember not to "give up" and leave the abusive marriage.

Answer 7

I agree and it's a shame to think that by the time my children are married, the divorce rate will probably be 99%. It's funny to think about our grandparents and great-grandparents because divorce was very seldomly heard of in their day. Infedelity also wasn't as big of an issue as it is in today's society.

I think that the divorce rate will continue to rise because getting married and divorced is so easy these days and divorces are so widely accepted. It used to be if you were married you were in the large percentage of America....now if you haven't been divorced at least once, then you are uncommon.

It's sad!!

Answer 8

Marriage is a commitment. Commitment is a DECISION to stay when it's fabulous, good, bad, ugly, boring, stagnant, whatever. And it will absolutely be those and more throughout a marriage. Our fast food/ it's-all-about-feelings society doesn't understand the concept of commitment. It's a decision. Period.

There's hope though! Especially if there's something bigger than the both of you in the marriage (read: God).

Answer 9

I agree with you!

I think that people shouldn't be so quick to go down the aisle unless they know that they are willing to see the marriage through. You should never go down the aisle with the idea that divorce is an option. It should be a last resort and used only in absolutely necessary situations (such as domestic violence)
Marriage should be held in higher regard than it is today.

Answer 10

Divorcees are not giving me a bad name, as
society and changes have not affected me and
my wife's values to us and our marriage, as when
one has a rock solid foundation in their marriage
no-one or nothing can brake through, having been
married over 20yrs, and my parents over55yrs,
that speaks for itself.