I have posted a lot of questions in the Marriage & Divorce section of Yahoo! Answers. Sometimes some of the men have really good advice and/or can relate to my situation. One in particular told me to e-mail him anytime if I wanted more advice or if I wanted to blow off some steam. Would that be considered cheating? I haven't accepted his offer, but I wanted to see what other people thought about it.
2007-08-14 09:35:56 · 44 answers · asked by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow! I got overwhelming responses to this question. I would say that half of you think it's okay and 1/2 of you think it's not okay. I thought about it ... would I want my husband doing that? More so, what if I found an e-mail from an unknown female in his inbox. Whether it was honest advice or not, I'd be mad. So I guess I will just stick with Yahoo! Answers or talk to my counselor when I need guidance.
2007-08-14 09:51:34 · update #1
If your partner knows about you emailing this new internet friend then your fine. Cheating starts as a violation of trust. So long as your up front about this new friend then your fine.
2007-08-14 10:44:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that would be considered cheating at all unless you begin to become emotionally connected to him via email then I would say that would be walking on the fence since there is such thing as an emotional affair. But if you are going to seek his advice for solely his advice nothing else... then I don't see anything wrong with it. There are so many what-ifs in this situation... you be the judge of when you feel you may be crossing the line and step back. I guess the real question would be is... how would you feel if your husband/boyfriend was seeking advice from a woman would it bother you? Good luck!
2007-08-14 09:43:42 · answer #2 · answered by xxfallenstarxx 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well, what would you do if you found out that your hubby was emailing somebody about your problems? You'd probably freak.
And, more importantly, this kind of venting leads to feelings. You're mad or hurt and here is this super nice guy that tells you that you're worth something and it makes you feel good. This is the kind of junk that leads to an emotional affair. It then makes you even more bitter towards your spouse and feel closer to the 3rd party. Be careful!!!
I'd steer clear if I were you. Go ahead and post questions, but leave it at that. You don't want to get caught up in something, it'll make things worse! Good luck!
2007-08-14 09:41:56 · answer #3 · answered by Hick Chick 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't consider that cheating, but would your husband? That is the only opinion that really matters. If you are having marriage problems, they won't get fixed unless you talk to him. Talking to someone else may give you some perspective, and probably make you feel better for the moment, but it won't help if you aren't talking to your husband.
Plus if you are having issues in your marriage, I say why do anything that could lead to temptation. If you aren't happy, it makes it all the easier to cross boundaries.....
Edited:
It sounds like you have a good plan. Why tempt fate? It's like a Pandora's box sometimes.
2007-08-14 09:41:26 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, that's not cheating. Cheating would be if you two started talking about sex with each other, flirting, making plans to meet, etc. It's okay to have male friends (online or off) and discuss personal issues, but be careful how personal things get between the two of you.
If you wouldn't want your partner to do it, then don't do it yourself. Stick to that rule and you'll probably not cross any lines of impropriety.
2007-08-14 09:40:28 · answer #5 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Speaking from experience, I would really be careful it could cause more harm than good. I have been married for over 10 years and my husband's bestfriend's girlfriend would confide in him regarding his bestfriend. It got to the point where she was getting so comfortable that she would call his cell phone (not our home phone) in the wee hours of the night or wanting him to meet with her for lunch so that they could talk. Luckily he confided in me regarding this situation because he felt uncomfortable so of course I had to intervene...Be careful and handle yourself accordingly... The advice that I gave her was to talk to her man because he was the only one who could fix the problem that she was having. Its okay to get the advice of what others may do in a situation. Find out what's going on with your man and if you still continue to have problems they need to consider other alternatives... Word to the wise from my own experience and many others I have come in contact with this type of thing almost always lead to other things that you may not have been looking for in the begining whether it be you or the person you seeking advice from start to have feelings...
2007-08-14 09:46:01 · answer #6 · answered by sweetcincylove 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you're marriage is already on the rocks, don't make it worse by soliciting one on one help. While you may know it is innocent, you also know your husband wouldn't want you chatting online with other men, especially when it gets more personal than yahoo answers. Put yourself in his shoes. How would you like it? Also, online affairs start somewhere - why not here?
2007-08-14 09:42:44 · answer #7 · answered by Button 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, it's seeking advice to help with your situation. If that was the case, every time you acknowledge a male co worker, you would be cheating, feel me? You know your heart is in the right place. I don't see anything wrong with it.
2007-08-14 09:42:00 · answer #8 · answered by Califiyah 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it's perfectly fine to talk to other guys even though u r in a relationship. Just make sure you contain the flirting part of talking to other men. Yahoo Answers is perfect for advice! There's nothing wrong with it. But emailing him is okay too, just make sure it doenst go further then JUST emailing for advice.
2007-08-14 09:40:19 · answer #9 · answered by Becca! 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
emailing someone is not cheating...you are simply using his advice to better your situation. He might know more than you and had more experiences in his lifetime. Sounds like you just need to talk to someone and he is willing to help. It is considered "cheating" if you go beyond that and start talking naughty to each other or meeting this person and going on dates
2007-08-14 09:39:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋