She will be born October 19th.
This is a bit confusing, see I have known this woman since middle school and she is also 7 months pregnant, well she had asked me to adopt her baby and well my husband and I are very interested. So instead of going through a hard adoption process he will be signing the birth certificate as her biological father so she will also have our last name. The mother is willing to sign over her rights so i would like to know how i go about adopting or becoming the mother to this baby since my husband will already be the father?
Are we able to put my name on the birth certificate instead of the biological mothers?
What about if we were to say she was our surrogate mother?
Also how can i quickly be put as the babies legal guardian until i can fully make her mine?
Please any help is greatly appreciated!
2007-08-14 06:55:04 · 15 answers · asked by Kasja 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I don't think you can legally put your name on the birth certificate...that would defeat the reasoning behind it...however, you really should have her sign over her rights now, instead of when the baby is born..get legal counseling on the appropriate actions that you can take at this point... good luck to you!!
2007-08-14 06:58:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
First get a lawyer. I bet they will say that he not sign the birth certificate. If you legally adopt the baby the baby will have your name. Also, I understand that you do not want to go through a "hard adoption process" but if you do not get a lawyer to go through every detail she could take that baby back at any time and then how would you feel. As far as saying that his name is on the birth cert. all she would have to do is say that he isn't the father and a dna test would prove that he isn't. You really do not have any legal rights unless you do it the correct way which does involve a lot of paperwork. Depending on you're states laws even if you have a lawyer the mother still has a period of time where she can change her mind, and LOT of mothers do change their minds after the fact. She may be totally up for getting rid of the baby now but once you give birth many women feel guilty or they feel like they need to be the mother of that child not someone else. Also, what it the real father comes into play. He also has to legally sign over his rights as well. He could come back at any time and say that he did not get a choice and take a dna test prove he's the father and legally he has every right to that baby. He could always say that he didn't know about the baby either until later and thats why he is showing up later. I think you guys also need to think about how the baby will feel. The child has every right to know once their older who their birthmother/father are. Maybe they won't want anything to do with them but they do have the right to know about their medical history which comes from them not you guys. How would you guys like to know that you're birth cert. was a lie. and why would you want to put your names on the cert. you did not give birth to the child. I think you guys really need to do your homework adopting a baby is not like adopting a puppy. There are a lot of things that need to be done for your protection and the protection of that child. I have had two friends that have gone through the adoption process and have filled out every piece of paper you can imagine and have still had the baby taken away because the mother changed her mind. In their case the mothers only had a few days to change her mind, but in your case if you do not do it the legal way she can change her mind at any time. Also, not just her but the father or any one of the family members because they would have rights to that baby before you. Do the right thing and get a lawyer.
2007-08-14 07:22:21 · answer #2 · answered by Vikki 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Before your husband puts his name on the birth certificate, check with a lawyer specializing in family law. You *really* don't want her to change her mind about giving up the baby if she gets the idea that since your husband is the "father", he can be FORCED to pay child support and/or spousal support. Do you really want to pay child support on a kid you don't get to raise?? Anyway, consult the lawyer and do what s/he says. Make sure it's a lawyer whose fiduciary responsibility is to you and your husband and NOT the mother, and NOT the state. If the lawyer is not being paid by you, he has NO duty to support your best interest. Spend some money and do this right. It's one of the most important things you will ever do.
Best wishes for obtaining your chosen baby.
2007-08-14 07:32:00 · answer #3 · answered by rainbeauclown 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talk to a lawyer and get the mother to sign papers to terminate her rights NOW or she will be able to change her mind and keep the baby. Go to your local adoption agency and ask about the laws because I am not sure if it is legal for your husband to sign the certificate even though he knows he is not the father. But definalty talk to a lawyer or she can even say you made her to this against her will which would leave the two of you with kidnapping charges and extortion charges. good luck
2007-08-14 07:01:30 · answer #4 · answered by Courtney B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to contact a lawyer, to make it all legal. . You can't just put your name on the birth certificate, the hospital will not allow that, even after adoptions your name will not be on the certificate.There will be tons of paperwork and fee's but it should go fairly easy.
Also, the mother will need the actual fathers consent to put the baby up for adoption and terminate his parental rights. So if you lie and say your husband is the fatehr and later on down the road the real father wants to see the baby or have rights, its going to be huge battle with DNA testing and putting the child through chaos. And also keep in mind the mother has up to 6mths (in most states) after the papers are signed to change her mind and take the baby back. So these are things you need to discuss in depth.
2007-08-14 06:58:35 · answer #5 · answered by alexis73102 6 · 7⤊ 1⤋
No its is NOT his and this IS fraud. If the father EVER finds out he could have a paternity test done and file charges against you BOTH for KIDNAPPING his child and YES that is what you are doing. The REAL father has rights to this child and I hope you all go to jail for trying to take his child away from him and that they put the baby in HIS custody FAR FAR away from you. Signing the birth certificate does NOT make him the father and a simple DNA test can have his name erased from the birth certificate. YES I HAVE seen it done. A friend of mine thought the baby was his and he signed the birth certificate but shortly afterward the girls ex showed up and found out she had a baby and filed a request through the court house for a DNA test. The two had to go to the court house with the child and have a DNA test done that came back to be his and he sued her for not telling him she was pregnant, had the other guy taken off the birth certificate, the name changed, and joint custody of the child with HIS home as the primary residence. You will seriously be hurting this child by what you are planning. She would be breaking the law by doing this and ANY adoption would be invalid.
2016-05-17 21:19:11 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As her bio mother... she can give you guys guardianship from minute one. She has the right to place her baby in the care of whomever she likes. Friends and family are often given this type of guardianship.
I would not start this off with a lie. I understand the legal process of adoption is long and hard, and often painful. But you guys might be playing with fire here. See if you can get some sort of custody/guardianship thing from the biomother until the legal process is done.
Good luck.
2007-08-14 07:08:13 · answer #7 · answered by Tanya 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow...you could be opening up a whole new can of worms here....if he signs the birth certificate then he is legally acknowledging that he is the father...if she backs out of the deal..she can get him for child support...though he can order a DNA test and prove that the baby is not his but until then he would be responsible.
As for your questions concerning yourself being made the guardian....I would suggest you speak to an attorney who is familiar with adoptions. Nobody here can give you the correct information. I would hate to see you be misled.
Good luck and I hope everything goes well for you two!
2007-08-14 07:03:28 · answer #8 · answered by KE 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
First of all what about the real Biological father you know he can request a prenatal test .If he is o.k. with it all you have to do is get a lawyer to file papers to make you the adopt mother .If everyone is on the same page it will take no time if you get a good attorney.
2007-08-14 07:02:37 · answer #9 · answered by notthatagain 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The lying part is not a good idea. If she would happen to change her mind, even years down the road, and reveals that the father being biological is a sham, this will reflect more poorly on you than her when you try to keep custody. Keep it clean now to avoid problems later, for the sake of the child.
Parenting is not easy, so why should the adoption process be.
2007-08-14 07:05:45 · answer #10 · answered by lillilou 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋