I found out Im About 6weeks Pregnant But my Partner Really Doesnt Want to know.He Says its him or the baby??
What am i supose to do...I have wanted this baby for so long and we have ben together 4years but he said he aint ready??
Can any help??
Thank you..xxxx
2007-08-14 04:54:07 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
My boyfriend said the exact same thing, and I got to the point to where I agreed to have the abortion, but then he had a change of heart. Give him time, if he really cares for you he will come around.
2007-08-14 05:03:51 · answer #1 · answered by Amber 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What a jerk. If he's making you choose between him and your child that HE helped make, I'd choose the baby. It's better to rough it on your own than to give it up for adoption when so many kids are already out there without loving families, or to have an abortion and be heartbroken about it for the rest of your life. I mean, I am pro-choice, but if you want the baby, don't abort it just because your asshole of a boyfriend is selfish. It takes two to tango, or in this case, make a child, so he needs to step up to the plate and take full responsibility for the result of his actions. Hopefully you have a good support system other than your boyfriend (ie family, friends...) and you won't have to be completely alone. Also, for the baby's sake, I hope your partner will eventually come around and want to be a part of the child's life. Good luck!
2007-08-14 05:07:57 · answer #2 · answered by Samantha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will not swear in this reply but I could easily find plenty of strong words to describe him. It sounds like he doesn't want to accept any responsibility and is therefore trying to use emotional blackmail to push you into having an abortion. If you really wanted to get pregnant, my advice is have the baby and get rid of him. After four years, he should be completely ready to commit, or has he been using you for the past four years? I hope you are in the UK as if you are, he will have a responsibility whether he likes it or not. If you have an abortion, your relationship will be finished anyway. So, you have two choices. You can keep the baby and lose him or have an abortion and lose him. You will not be able to forgive him for forcing you to abort and you will regret it. Therefore, you can keep your baby or lose all. It will be hard, on your own but once the CSA get at him, he will have to pay towards the child's upkeep for the next 16 years. My advice, get rid of him and make him pay for what he is putting you through (for 16 years). Remember, if he says that he isn't ready, after four years, you can guarantee that he will not be ready after another four and another four etc. etc. I hate people like him. He's just stringing you along for his own selfishness and personal pleasure. It's obvious that he doesn't care for you or else he wouldn't give such a nasty ultimatum.
2007-08-14 05:36:03 · answer #3 · answered by kendavi 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, he chose to have sex, and when you have sex there is always the possibility of a baby. He knows that. I don't believe in abortion. It's unfair. I'm not sure what your beliefs are, but if you choose not to keep your baby, please, please consider adoption. There are so many loving families out there that cannot have children.
If I were in your situation, I'd tell the guy to hit the road. Nothing compares to a mother's love for her child. If he's not ready for a baby, he shouldn't have been ready to have sex. If I were you, seeing as how long you've wanted this baby, I would kick his butt to the curb. You really need to sit and think about this. No one can decide for you. All we can do is tell you our position on it. I really hope he changes his mind. Four years is a lot to throw away, except when it comes to your unborn child. Good luck with everything!
2007-08-14 05:05:51 · answer #4 · answered by chasityhornbeck07 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Please do not get rid of your baby because your man isn't responsible enough to take care of his responsibilities. There are worst things to be in this world than a single mother. Honestly, if he wasn't ready then he should of been wearing a rubber but judging from the vibe I'm getting, I'll bet money he wanted you to be the own to worry about the birth control. I'll tell you this, if you get rid of the baby because of him you will end up resenting him and chances are you will break up anyway in the long run. Good Luck and remember listen to yuor heart not your head.
2007-08-14 05:07:34 · answer #5 · answered by SexyMommy2B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all this man obviousley does not love you. A man can be not ready and stressed out about becoming a father to soon, as most men do, but that does not mean that they have the right to make you choose between your own child and them!! I would most definitely get rid of this man and get prepared to have a bumpy road ahead going into this alone. All I can say is to keep your head up because you can do it and make it through all this. I have done it alone with 3 kids and it is not impossible. If you did choose to eliminate this pregnancy think of what you would have to live with the rest of your life. It would probably devistate you because you would only be doing it for someone else, not yourself. You want this baby so it would be a mistake to get rid of it unless you seriously think you could live with yourself after that.
2007-08-14 05:07:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Tough decision in front of you,I'm sorry.You have to look at your options.You stay with him and have an abortion,with the chance that you won't have another child when he's ready.You have the baby and lose him, or you have the baby and he gets ready quick! No one can pressure you into anything.take some time away from your partner, long weekend,if possible a bit more.Give him the chance to wrap his brain around it. You need to decide,even if he wants the baby,if you still want him.Be strong and do what is right for you. You're in my thoughts...
2007-08-14 05:07:17 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara D 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your partner is being an a$s about it. If you want the baby then keep the baby and get rid of the jerk. He's letting you know what kind of character and morals he has by the way he is treating you, and it's not favorable. And if you gave up a baby for him you'd resent him and hate yourself and the relationship would probably end anyway. Good luck!
2007-08-14 05:04:19 · answer #8 · answered by nimo22 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't kill an innocent life for a relationship with a man like that! The baby will require your full attention now, and fill your life with love. As time goes by your partner may start liking the idea or get used to it....if not, do you want someone like this in your life? Will he ever be ready for kids or will your dreams of having them be destroyed? Ultimately it's your choice.
2007-08-14 05:03:09 · answer #9 · answered by Betty 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You have to decided what is right for you. It has got be a hard decision because you have been with your boyfriend for such a long time but will it last forever? You have allot to think about. One of my friends went through the same thing and she had an abortion which she still thinks about and it is 4 years later and her and her boyfriend broke up like 6 months after the abortion. If it were me I would keep my baby and maybe he will change his mind. Good luck!
2007-08-14 05:04:26 · answer #10 · answered by skyler 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, don't try to change his mind! I'm sorry that he has done this to you, but you need to concentrate on this issue without him! Get rid of him first and then start spending time with family and friends. If you can emotionally, mentally and financially take care of this baby by yourself, I suggest it. If you cannot, consider adoption. I wish you all the best and I hope you get rid of the guy who can't stand up and be a man about this!
2007-08-14 05:03:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋