Who makes all the major decisions in your marriage?

Question

I am all for a collaboration but I think that there are somethings that should be handled by just one person so that there is consistancy.

Answer 1

We both do, that is what makes a marriage work, been married for 19 years now

Answer 2

Umm Ok but all of the "major" decision i.e. buying a house for instance are a collaberation between both my husband & I. We always consult one another letting the other know our intensions but with smaller decisions there isn't as much a need for joint decision making persay. We are more liberal I guess you could say from most marriages. We each have our own seperate bank accounts, both work full-time, each pay our own bills. Yet our home is in both of our names. There is an agreement where my husband pays the mortgage & all the house bills. And I provide all other needs i.e. groceries, pay health insurance etc. This way we maintain our own individuality. This positively feeds our relationship & there is no financial "spats". There is no "asking" when it comes to minor spending and everyones happy since each party is carrying their load. This is what keeps our marriage happy-healthy-& prosperous! We are seperate yet very much together~

Answer 3

I do, i am a a stay at home mom and there are decisions that need to be made with out me calling up my husband all the time to see what he thinks. Yes there are major decisions that we will work out together like: when to buy a house, what house we should buy, how many children, where to go on vacation, etc. But for the most part i decide things like: where are money goes, i pay all the bills, he trusts my judgment how how to raise the children, i can take my children to see all the doctors, dentists, etc with out telling him that i am. Of course if i wanted him to help me make all of our family decisions or if he wanted to help me he would. But he works 80 hours a week and i work at home. i feel like he bringing in the money and working very hard why shouldn't i take of some of the pressure of making all of the little decisions.

Answer 4

We make all the decisions together. Sometimes that means that together we decide to let one person handle a certain part of the marriage like I handle all of the money and finances, shopping for the family etc....

Answer 5

My husband and I are very lucky, we have a great marriage and get along great. When it comes to decisions, we always talk about them together and usually decide together. My husband is a very indecisive easy-going person though, so many times I take the reins and make the final decision, but not always. As all people are unique, so are all marriages.

Answer 6

Before marriage is the best time to make the decision as to who will make certain decisions. Both need to discuss this well before marriage and know oneself very well for this decision to be reached without argument or anger being involved. For different people there are different strengths and weaknesses as well. Two people..before marriage ..MUST know these things about themselves and their intended spouse.

Answer 7

I always like a line out of the Readers Digest a number of years ago in the Life in these US column.
"When my wife and I got married it was decided that she would make all the small decisions and I would make the major decisions. There has never been a major decision."
Truly major decisions should be a shared process.

Answer 8

My husband works for a company that moves alot, he always ask me what i think. I always tell him that i don't care because i support him in his decision. I trust my husband to do the right thing. He makes most of the important decision. I make the little ones. Like what's for supper. The important thing is we ask each other what they want.

Answer 9

A marriage is between two people therefore every decision made by one needs the consideration of the other

Answer 10

My husband does. It was something we discussed before we got married and both agreed on. My husband works, I dont. My husband makes money, I dont. Therefore anything that involves money (which is most major decisions) my husband makes the decisions. Its not to say he doesnt talk to me about them, and that we dont discuss things, but when it comes down to the last straw its always been his choice.

Now before anyone thinks of me as the poor subservient wife, let me i say this I chose this lifestyle, no one forced me into it and im quite happy with it, my husband also chose this lifestlye I didnt force him into it, and hes quite happy with it. This type of marriage doesnt work for everyone but it works for us.

My husband is the king of this castle, and thats they way we BOTH want it.

And here come the thumbs down because people dont understand that different lifestyles work for different people. Like i said we are both very happy and made this choice before we got married.