FOR THE SAKE OF THE KIDS
2007-08-14 03:05:02 · 19 answers · asked by Omar 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would not only stay but I would find creative ways to help bring some fire back into my marriage. I hate boredom. And if I am in something I helped make go dead, I am not going to run away. I am going to find ways to shake things up and make the blood flow faster, without causing strokes, cardiac arrest, etc. My responsibility is to what I promisd to do. To love, to cherish, to honor my husband. Leaving him because I am bored is not an option and is also an extremely bad and stupid example to set for my children.
2007-08-14 03:13:51 · answer #1 · answered by jokerthefreak1 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No. I don't want to teach my kids to "settle". I want to teach them that they can be completely happy in a relationship and have true love. I want to teach them that they have to do what it takes in life-no matter what it is-to make themselves happy and don't worry about what others feel. I want them to have higher standards for themselves than to just settle into a loveless marriage just for the sake of the kids. Especially since both parents would be even better parents if they are truley happy-and not just staying together for the sake of someone else. And plus, if they are staying together for the sake of the kids, after the kids grow up and leave, what is the couple going to do? Get divorced then or just live out their "golden years" in a miserable silence or start having affairs? From my experience, the kids actually handle divorces better young. When they are 20 or 30 somethings-it seems to take them by shock and they start questioning their own views on love and what not. Kids always have in their mind that their parents relationship symbolizes love and what marriage should be and I don't want to teach my children that a loveless marriage is the right way to do it.
2007-08-14 10:21:07 · answer #2 · answered by Jackie 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
yes.....
try reading a book "The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce"
basically what they found was that children suffer much less when their parents stay together for the sake of the kids than when they divorce
Obviously it is very different when there is abuse and the whole family structure has broken down.........but in cases where the parents are unhappy but still good parents, the family structure is still strong and the children have the base they need to go about their lives.
It makes thinking about divorcing so much harder......my parents divorced and I would want to spare my child so much of that.....I know she is happy - how can I take that away from her. I am really unhappy in my marriage.....but our family life still works...
add to that......I live in a country that would most likely give my husband custody rather than me (biased against foreign spouses). I would make a deal with the devil rather than give up my child...........
2007-08-14 12:25:39 · answer #3 · answered by psychokitty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No,
If you stay around for the sake of your children, they can see there is no love. I want to teach my children love and respect. When they see their parents aren't hugging, kissing, be affectionate and loving eachother....chances are when they get older they will have a hard time being affectionate with others.
Children are very smart, often times smarter than adults. All they do at young ages is observe.
2007-08-14 10:14:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the relationship. If there was no love, but we could get along and tolerate each other I would probably consider it. However, if there was the constant arguing and fussing I would have to go...for the sake of the kids.
2007-08-14 10:10:20 · answer #5 · answered by Tina 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Omar it does not work like that if the love is gone... your kids pick up on these feelings.... if the mother is not happy no one is.... it is better to be happy and alone than unhappy with a marriage that is loveless... iam sure your kids see and hear things that are not good...... think of the kids and if old enough ask them how they feel......
2007-08-14 10:18:28 · answer #6 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I didn't, but its very hard on the child. If I ever had to do it again I would have stayed with him for my sons sake only. Children really suffer the most in divorce.
2007-08-14 10:19:14 · answer #7 · answered by Maria 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would work on getting the love back because it's important to provide a stable home environment for your children. I wouldn't just give up I would go to counselling or whatever to fix the problem.
2007-08-14 10:38:08 · answer #8 · answered by Steven's Mommy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No. I think kids can sense that there is a lack of love and emotion between two parents and it would do them more harm than to live in a house without love then with divorced parents.
2007-08-14 10:12:20 · answer #9 · answered by GingerGirl 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
no because it is unhealthy for everyone. the kids see that there is no love between the two of u and that is not the right reason to stay together.
2007-08-14 10:16:51 · answer #10 · answered by UofL Girl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋