http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ar6Y6l34RDjKxnfw2LTw4njsy6IX?qid=20070813214628AAPomXR
^^^it's at that link...sorry i couldn't copy it on this question. thanx!
2007-08-13 17:53:06 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
i posted it in poetry && here....i got only a little bit of answers in the poetry section tho lol
2007-08-13 18:00:00 · update #1
I think it's really good. You have a lot of potential for a young writer. You capture a day at the beach wonderfully. I can almost hear the sounds of the gulls and waves....
The only thing I would change... and it's small and would slightly change the flow is the line:
"By the waves, out of the ocean"
I would say
"By the waves, from the ocean"
But seriously, that is all i would change and i think it's just a personal flow.
You did great!
2007-08-13 18:08:45 · answer #1 · answered by Jazeebelle 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it incredibly is extremely rude to ask your travellers (definite travellers, not shoppers) for presents, not to show funds, and it incredibly is basically including to the insult by inquiring for it interior the style of a banal and illiterate poem. reliable grief woman, have somewhat dignity. And before you back start up going off on people who're thinking your person ethics, could I ask do you ask all your travellers, be it at your residence for dinner or a cup of tea to kin events etc, for presents and funds? Do you? in case you do not, why ought to those travellers be dealt with as a funds cow and not others? in no way assume presents, and in case you do not understand why look up what 'present' ability.
2016-12-15 14:33:46 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your content is great. Your beat is a little rough, but overall it's a good poem. It really does give me a good mental picture of the beach.
2007-08-13 18:17:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like it, but to be truthful, you'd get more answers if you post this in the poetry section =)
2007-08-13 17:57:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's pretty good, just add a few more powerful images in there.
2007-08-13 17:59:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
fine as frog hair.
2007-08-13 17:58:39 · answer #6 · answered by RANDELL 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's really good.
2007-08-13 17:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by wolflady 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds excellent
2007-08-13 17:57:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really like it! good job!
:)
2007-08-13 17:59:04 · answer #9 · answered by jcturtle001 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋