4 years ago a new family moved into the street where I live. I went out of my way to make friends and "S" the wife/mother became a very close friend. Our children played together etc. She used to come round 3/4 times a week and occassionally we would have a night out.
2 years ago I got married. Because my husband is in the army and is away during the week our weekends our now precious. I still went out of my way to spend time with her - but she started to "move away" from me. She then complained that I spent too much time with my husband.
I spent ages choosing her birthday gift this year as I am on maternity leave and cannot afford much but wanted to demonstrate that she is still special to me. I HAVE JUST SEEN IT FOR SALE ON EBAY BY HER!!
Am feeling really offended.
2007-08-13 10:38:52 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I should add that she has been especially funny with me since I became pregnant - as she isn't having any luck getting pregnant. I am trying to be as sensitive as possible around the issue and will go out of my way not to mention any pregnancy issues to her - unless she brings it up. Feel like I have tried and tried to be a good friend and she has gone too far.
2007-08-13 10:40:27 · update #1
Just been extremely childish - put a bid on the item on ebay so that she will know that I know she is selling it. Couldn't help it - blame the pregnancy hormones.
p.s. its under "unwanted gift" in the title - nice hey?
2007-08-13 10:55:59 · update #2
As hard as it is you need to try and move on, you don't need someone like that in your life. I understand where your coming from (see my questions). My closest friend of 12 years ditched me a few months ago, I tried everything to resolve the matter, invited her round to try and save the friendship and she said she needed more time as she didn't want to make things worse. I accepted this and left her to it. 2 wks later I came across a blog on one of her profile pages sayin she had decided to end the friendship etc etc (I was deeply hurt because she was telling her cyberfriends but didn't have the decency to tell me, I also realised that she had posted that blog 4 days after tellin me that she needed more time!!! Just recently I have seen her sell the items she had bought for my baby at the beginning of the year (when we were friends) on ebay also. That tipped me over the edge for a few days and made be deeply depressed as I realised it was the final nail in the coffin on her behalf. I just wish she had the decency to tell me once and for all that our friendship is over but I am finally coming to terms with the fact that as far as she is concerned it is dead and buried. This hurts and although it still bothers me and I think about it everyday I have to move on. As hard as it is we don't need people like that in our lives. Contact me if you want to chat further lol! All the best, my baby is due in 2.5 wks so will be preoccupied then and won't need to even waste my time thinking about her! Good luck with the pregnancy! x
2007-08-13 11:08:11 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa R 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should feel offended b/c what she did is outwardly rude. It sounds like she's jealous and/or angry b/c things in her life aren't working out the way she'd like and maybe she sees that things in your life are. As for the gift, you never know - maybe she's secretly really desperate for money and needed to sell it, but it's still rude to do so. You did a sweet thing for her with the birthday gift and with trying to be a good friend, but it seems like right now she can't offer a good friendship in return. If anything I'd gently let her know that you were hurt by her selling the item on eBay and by her behavior and once again offer your support as a friend - if she doesn't take it then it's time for you to let go and move on - you don't need a toxic friendship in your life. Good luck.
2007-08-13 10:49:20 · answer #2 · answered by needstoknow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she has some pretty big issues with you- that alone might want to get rid of the gift if it reminds her of them. It's not easy but take the hint and move on- she may have wanted to offend you on purpose.
2007-08-13 10:56:54 · answer #3 · answered by lucius.graecus 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are not feeling comfortable just always be busy when she calls or wants to make plans, eventualy you will drift away from her, she has no right to complain about the time you spend with your husband .
2007-08-13 10:46:58 · answer #4 · answered by kez 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Apparently you're just going to have to give up on her--hard, I know--and find another friend. It's too bad.
2007-08-13 10:48:00 · answer #5 · answered by Jess 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, she doesn't sound decent.
Confront her about this.
If she doesn't like you anyways you have nothing to lose.
Make time for family and proper friends.
Don't stress about this one person.
2007-08-13 10:58:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ditch the *****
2007-08-13 10:44:37 · answer #7 · answered by Rick J 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you should feel very offended. i think you should ask her about it! its her problem not yours
2007-08-13 10:47:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should,Wait till she wants something and.............
2007-08-13 11:16:02 · answer #9 · answered by taxed till i die,and then some. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋