How should i tell my babys dad he is gonna be a daddy? (i'm pregnant)?

Question

i am 18 weeks along and he is engaged to a girl who is also pregnant i think she is 16 weeks and he was screwin her while we were together. i dont know how to tell him because i know it will cause problems because he is 19 and i am 16

Answer 1

#1 - Do your parents know? You will need their support emotionally more than his. It may have been illegal that he even had sex with you. They may be mad, but in the end it'll work out.
#2 - Why are you having sex at age 16? These are supposed to be the best years of your life. I blame both of you for not using protection. It is so out there and even free. If you are mature enough to have sex, you are mature enough to think about protection. He's a mess, 19, engaged to another woman who is pregnant and not using condoms. He is not a father figure, more like a sperm donor figure. Thank God you got pregnant and not AIDS!!! A baby is a joy, AIDS is a death sentence.
#3 - Why would you have sex with a man who is engaged? That is definately not good. He has commited to another woman. Not you. Why give up something as precious as yourself to someone who has already chosen someone else to spend his life with. But, I also know men can be pretty decieving and coniving when they want to.
#4 - Of course you have to tell him. BUT....have people with you who are SINCERELY interested in your situation. Odds are that you are not going to get the answer you want out of him. Why would you worry about causing problems for him when he has done so much damage to you? His fiance also has a right to know as your baby will affect her life also. I can pretty much bet he won't tell her.
#5 - Start deciding how you are going to raise this baby. Abortion is completely out of the question - you are too far along and it is so complicated of an issue. If you decide to raise this child you need to still attend school, there are options out there. Please finish your education. Don't worry about outsiders and what they say. Keep positive people around you and it will be a positive experience. Studies have shown that the emotional state of a pregnant mother does affect the child after birth. Be happy. You've been blessed. Take it as a blessing and make your choice whether to keep it or not. Please, please, please don't let anyone make the decision for you. It is your decision and one of great importance. Rasising a baby young is hard but trust me, not knowing the child you gave birth too is just as hard.
#5 - This should have ranked higher but I saved it for last so you'll remember it. Make full use of all services in your community. There are outreach servcies for youth everywhere. There are people out there who care and have experience in these situations. They can offer so much more advice and help than any of us. Reach out, you'll never regret it. They can send you to the proper services available. Many of the services are free.
#6 - Good luck. Whatever YOU decide will be the best decison for you. Make sure it is an informed decision and one YOU are truly happy with. It may be hard to see now, but a child is a blessing. Remember, in with the positive, out with the negative!!!! God bless you.

Answer 2

As the unwed mother, she has all the rights. You just need to discuss this with her some more. Tell her how you feel. The fact that she has 3 other children by other men, is on welfare and not working should have been a sign that she may not fully know what she wants in her life. Do the other children have their fathers surname? If they do, maybe she finally learned her lesson and realized she shouldn't give the baby the last name of the father until AFTER they are married. Perhaps you are just reading too much into the situation. Who knows? This is part of the reason why people should be married before having children. I'm sorry for your predicament. I hope it works out.

Answer 3

Trust me the sooner you tell him the better. You have obviously decided you will keep it (as the max time for a termination is 15weeks usually) so he has a right to know. Basically nothing will change, you are through the first trimester which means its a pretty done deed so he is going to find out sooner or later. The sooner you tell him the sooner it will be over and done with and you wont have to worry. however he is going to recat i doubt the difference of a matter of days or weeks will change anything. Make it clear to him if you wnat him involved or not. Also if his other girlfriend is keeping the other baby you will be in eachothers lives forever lined by this man and your children so it may be worthwhile bondinjg now while you have something in common especially as there is only 2 weeks in between. It may turn the other way and you fidn the only reason he is staying with the other girl is because SHE is pregnant so definately tell him because it affects not only yourself.

Answer 4

Have you told your family? They need to know so that whatever happens you will have the support you and the baby need. He sounds pretty irresponsible to have maybe two girls pregnant at the same time. He didn't take responsibility to stop you from getting pregnant in the first place so I wouldn't worry about causing problems by telling him. The sooner he finds out the better and it may stop him from being so careless in future. I hope everything goes OK for you :)

Answer 5

If you are not very careful it could get very messy.
Why not write him a letter letting him know you are pregnant and what you expect or hope for from him.
I assume you are not trying to wreck the relationship he has now,so make that clear to both of them. If he can seperate the baby and you in his own mind, there is no reason why he cant be a good dad to both the children.
Good luck cos I think you might need it x

Answer 6

Hey I had this problem, dont do what i did and send a text WORSE mistake ever! I told him when I spoke to him next and I ended up in hospital becuase he hit me that hard in my chest that it windy me, I told him that I was keeping it not to hurt him or his new girlfriend but becuase I new I had the surrport around to make it work. . I hope you have the surrport becuase if he did that to you dont take him back or dont let him near the baby, I know it hard but if you think something bad might happen dont tell him, I know that sounds mean but I wish to this day i didnt tell my daughters dad about her becuase he has tryed so so hard to make mylife hell and to take away my daughter. Now Im preg with my parnter of year and a half and I couldnt be happier. .
Justthink hard before you say anything.
Good luck honey!

Answer 7

I know someone who was put into a similar situation, but you have to tell him. I know you may be afraid of what the outcome may be but he has the right to know. You also may not like what his reaction is when you tell him. And don't get discouraged if he doesn't come running back, but if you have a loving and supporting family then you don't need him. Is he with the other girl because she is pregnant?

Answer 8

WOW...that sounds messy. Make sure you have a strong support network around you first because he might not take it well to be honest. Do you realise the ressponsibility you have in bringing a human being into the world? I have a young baby and it's a huge thing. Make sure you have friends and family yo help you both physically and emotionally. Good luck

Answer 9

Do your homework first: get on the Internet and find out what the age of consent is in your state. If you live in Tenessee it may be twelve. Just kidding! If you are a minor (he certainly isn't!), that would give you plenty of leverage. USE IT WISELY!!! He won't do you any good in jail. Get good advice from someone you trust. Don't do anything else stupid!

Answer 10

Just tell him, straight up, and in front of the new girlfriend. If he asks for proof, show him the pregnancy test results. If he wants to refute it, have a blood test done. Also, why not get him for statuatory rape? Sounds like he's a jerk!