I am scared to reunite with my ex-husband who lives in another state. We divorced a few years ago and have a 15 year old daughter. He has sole physical and legal custody, but has now sent her to me.
He says that I want to keep my feet in two places - my parents house and our house. I am not committed or loyal in his mind. I have left him many times and gone back many times over the past few years.
I have to make a decision soon since it will mean moving for my daughter and myself.
My daughter is in a lot of pain and keeps saying "I wish that I had never been born."
I want my daughter's life to be better than it has been. She has not had a good childhood.
Yet, I don't know if I can deal with my ex-husband again and his controlling ways. He was upset with me for not working on the transition/ move this past weekend.
How do I make decision that please everyone - my daughter and ex-husband and myself.
My parents think I should not get back together.
2007-08-13 07:18:39 · 4 answers · asked by Stareyes 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You divorced a few years ago! Has any thing seriously changed for the good, the answer you give is no , The answer in you unfortunate situation you can not make all three of you happy. So stay as you are and remember you life is just as important as others.
2007-08-13 07:38:27 · answer #1 · answered by 121aloraphotos 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What makes you think things will change if/when you go back to stay with him?
Frankly, your answer lies with your daughter, her welfare, and her happiness.
It's way past the time to stand on your own two feet and show her the model you should be to her. Be independent instead of dependent.
Demonstrate the traits you want her to learn, show her that you actually care about her, and what's important to her. He would not have "sent" her to live with you if there weren't problems, so moving back there with her to live with him will bring those problems right back into her life.
He sounds selfish, and you sound unable to be independent of someone taking care of you.
You really need to change your priorities.
2007-08-13 14:30:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your number one priority is your daughter. She obviously needs some help if she is feeling worthless. Talk to her. Maybe living with her father all those years has made her feel this way, if he is as controlling as you say. Why does she feel worthless? Will she talk to you? If not, please get her into counseling ASAP. Do not uproot her again for you or your ex. She needs stability and to feel self-worth. She did not ask to be brought into this world, you brought her here. It is your responsibility to get her the help she needs, and to give her a stable, loving home.
Good luck!!
2007-08-13 14:33:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to go if it's going into a better living condition. But I would demand some changes! Assert yourself because your the girl, you are the one he should care for and tend to, not control.
2007-08-13 14:26:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋