And I said some pretty rude things to him. All true things, but nevertheless....things I should have kept to myself. I try to justify it by the fact that he has said some pretty mean things to me in the past, and it's a way of getting back at him. He stomped on my cell phone and broke it, then left the house and didn't come back until 4 in the morning, and slept on the couch. I left for work this morning, and he was still sleeping. (We were both drinking last night)
Has this kind of a thing happened before, and how did you get over it...or did you?
2007-08-13 05:47:08 · 15 answers · asked by sdgirljen 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It was the first time I had a drink in a month. He drinks every night and we both know that is the root of the problem.
2007-08-13 05:53:55 · update #1
Yes, these things happen. Just let the situation cool down a bit. When you get home appologixe and everything should be fine. It seems like you tow have some issues that need to be addressed and I would start there, Comunicate with one another without yelling or walking out. I wish you both the best of luck!!
2007-08-13 05:54:33 · answer #1 · answered by frawlicious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow.. you both have gotten to a point where ur having a disfunctional marriage, self destructing ur marriage, and anger and resentment issues..
1. always remember although ur in a heated arguement never say things u cant take back.
2. you both need to find a new way of communicating to keep from these fights exculating to a point of all this happening..
3. You both need to realize that for whatever reason, u are both self destructing ur marriage by actting so hateful to each other in the fight..
Time to get some counseling and stop drinking..if u cant control ur tempers and cant think clearly when argueing then u have no business adding alcohol to the equation..
2007-08-13 05:56:21 · answer #2 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they were true, do not try to justify them. You have both said and done things that you regret. If they were true, do not appologize for saying them, just appologize for saying them the way you did. Drinking will elevate things, but this is NOT an excuse for anything, so do not use it as one. It was a tough fight, and you two need to work on this issue in order to save the marriage. Yes, I have been through it, but I did not say or do anything that I would regret. He got mad and threw my cell against the wall and it shattered. He then grabbed me, landed me into the entertainment center, and then pushed me onto the couch. I had bruises from his hand prints on me. I left as well, and did not come back until it was time for him to go to work. As soon as he left, I packed all of mine and the kids things and left. He knew before we even got serious that if he ever broke a promise to me, cheated, or laid one hand on me, then that would be the end of it. And it was.
2007-08-13 05:55:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am having some of the same issues with my husband, about arguing & fighting all the time, so I finally asked him to go to counseling and he said no, so I left with our 4.5 yr old for 2 days then he said that he would try and work his issues out on his own, well I am going to counseling on my own and tonight is my first session and I am excited about it, I really can't wait to get all my feelings out and have someone listen to them and help me understand if this is what I want for the rest of my life. Can you sit down & talk to him or will that end in a fight, that's what happens with us, that is why I need more help from a counselor, I would try that & see what happens, if you 2 are really meant for each other than you both should be willing to work it out.
2007-08-13 07:13:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well my husband and I have has some arguments in the past, but have never had a fight. What we try to do is never go to bed angry all that does is cause problems in the future. You need to sit down and talk about what happened and hopefully get back together and not let that get in between you.
2007-08-13 05:53:56 · answer #5 · answered by Jules 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh ya. Alcohol + Relationships = Disaster
No one is against an occasional drink and heck, ugly guys wouldn't stand a chance with a pretty girl without her being a bit tipsy. (Just Kidding)
But, alcohol as a general rule is a depressant and does little to help relationships.
I'm sorry to hear your having so much trouble. Good luck.
2007-08-13 06:06:43 · answer #6 · answered by nremtohio 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the marriage is going to work you have to learn to fight constructively. Yelling mean things and destroying each others property is not the solution. You said things you meant but not in the way they should have been said. You both need to talk not fight, and see if there is enough left to save. If so, all dirty laundry needs to be discussed, but please keep in mind his feelings while talking. If he resorts to the old way, by saying mean hurtful things, then you need to calmly tell him you are not looking to fight, you are looking to save your marriage.
2007-08-13 05:55:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
fighting is never a good idea , i can tell from my personal exp. if u have anything in mind which hurts u about ur husband its better to keep it within instead of blowing out on him..in anger anyone can use bad words that doesnt mean end of relation.. please try to forget all bad things and start again... pl work hard to save ur marriage
2007-08-13 06:49:36 · answer #8 · answered by jessy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are in an abusive relationship you both need to end the circle, it sounds like drinking is the lead cause , throw all of it out. and sit down and learn to be friends.
2007-08-13 05:55:01 · answer #9 · answered by mama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't drink, you cut out a lot of the drama and fights are much less frequent.
2007-08-13 05:52:14 · answer #10 · answered by Willie J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋