Set me free , even just for an hour ,
I don’t want to just sit there when you do and wonder what I’m feeling,
Every day I deem to understand, my consolation
One never knows the pleasures of being blind,
I can see you, I can hear you,
I’m alive in an eerie way,
There is nothing more embarrassing than a blighted heart,
And no matter where I look I find no pity at my doorstep,
Everyone seems to cash in their tokens just fine,
I believe there was a time when I had a pocket full,
I laughed pleasurably, in the company of a mirror image,
Who looked like a star,
I took all my tokens out from my pocket and to the devil I pledged my soul,
I’m as dark as the demons, for I too have a heart of gold,
A heart of gold in chains, and the key lies in the belly of the beast,
My mind like an open notebook,
Has run out of another clean sheet,
I’d love to write something good,
Read these lines when you begin your journey,
Remember to keep your tokens, they should last you till the end of your days,
No one wants to fight the war, the everlasting pull,
Don’t jump out of your skin
Set me free, even just for an hour …
2007-08-13 04:59:52 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
Wow! That was such a creative poem. It had such power in words. Your gifted.
Please for all viewing this peom i need you all to help me in a voting. People with such creativity and strong imagination and expession and i bet you won't know who to choose as the best. Well i need your help to vote the best answer. And to tell me why you think it is. To paste your comment go to
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AkFHp2ZmxcHmVbi6Yb25CIfsy6IX?qid=20070810124702AAgQQhV
And on that page it is stated i also pasted the place where you could be able to see these increduble peots and their peoms. Just go and you'll understand. Thanks.
2007-08-13 05:34:38 · answer #1 · answered by LiveLuv&Laugh 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A pretty good write...you could probably tighten it up a little by editing some of the longer lines so they have more punch. It looks like a good first or second draft. Consider pulling "I'm alive in an..." up to the previous line; I see no reason to stick a line break there anyway.
A good rant if I've ever heard one.
keep writing
2007-08-15 00:15:39 · answer #2 · answered by Kevin S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that was your very own poem then you're very creative!
2007-08-14 04:50:50 · answer #3 · answered by Baboushka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This has so much meaning to it. I love how there is so much emotion. Thank you for sharing this beautiful poem. Please keep writing!!!!!
2007-08-13 13:26:58 · answer #4 · answered by Argent 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey, thats pretty good
poetry is tough
2007-08-13 12:11:31 · answer #5 · answered by Eric the Red 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋