How to deal with a miscarriage?

Question

I found out at almost 7 weeks that I was losing my baby. My husband and I were so happy to be pregnant and from what seems like one day to another I find out I'm not anymore. My husband is super supportive but seems like some family and friends don't think it's to much of a deal b/c I wasn't that far along. I was devestated though, I've been so upset lately. I was wondering what advice you may have for me because I need some help from people with similar stories. Thank you and God bless.

Answer 1

Last november, my husband and I decided to start ttc.. we were successful the first month!!! For about a week it was great!! i made it to almost 6 weeks, and then i started bleeding.. i went to the ER and it was a miscarriage.. i understand.. it does not matter how far you were, it is still heartbreaking, but they say that when it happens that early on, it is natures way of getting rid of a life that just "was not right".. we continued to try, and this April was another success!! I am now 17 weeks preg with a healthy baby. You too will overcome and have a happy healthy successful pregnancy!! good luck!

Answer 2

I am so sorry for you. I can only imagine what you have been feeling. I have been trying to concieve for almost a year now and I know that even thinking Im pregnant and then seeing a negative sign on the test is so dissapointing so I cant even imagine going through a miscarriage. The only advice I can give you is that it is Okay to feel the way you are. There is no time frame to when you should feel better and its ok to mourn, its normal and completely expected. Some people might not understand what you are feeling simply because it didnt happen to them or they have never been through it before, some might not know how to aproach the subject with you and would rather not bring it up or act like it not a big deal because they dont have the right words to say or they dont want to upset you by talking about it. Just continue to lean on your husband for support and you might even consider joining a women's support group online for women who are trying to concieve or for women who have had miscarriages. It might help to talk about your feelings with others who have gone through it. Whatever you do, dont bottle up your emotions, let the grieving process take its course. I hope everything works out for you and your family. God bless you .

Answer 3

Depends on your spiritual beliefs (not intended to sway your religous beliefs): Our spirit was given an opportunity to choose to come to this place we call earth and to experience for God. As many times as we like (yes, reincarnate). God knows we are busy spirits and does not require that we enter a new body until it is the time we want to (choice). We would be too bored. A spirit does not usually enter a new body until towards the end of gestation. Also, a spirit would not enter a new body knowing that it was not going to live, I mean, thats would be pointless, right? NOT to say that you DIDN'T have a living being inside you. NOT to say that it wasn't alive...it just didn't have a spiritual identity...yet. Your loss was not in vain, however. It just was not meant to be, just yet. A lesson should be learned..individually as each of you mourn the loss. But, don't dwell. Find out, physically, why you couldn't carry the baby to term and then "try" to fix it. This is never, never a blame situation. Nor is it a punishment from God (God is all loving and perfect and through that knowledge...he does not directly cause this...it's your human body that rejected this little life) You will have a chance to try again, if medically allowed. Don't give up!!

Answer 4

it does not matter what they think, they are not the ones going through it. it would be nice if they were supportive but to be fair to them they can not feel the loss of something they were not attached to and in love with. but you do have the support and comfort of your husband and he is the only one you live with, so therefore the only one that really matters. it is just as hard to deal with the loss thru early miscarriage as it would be if you were 8 months along because it is the loss of the dream of that baby and all the hopes and plans you had for it.
the only advice i can give you is lean on your husband, don't shut him out but you also have to let him lean on you. be honest with each other and turn the problem over to God and let him take care of you. time will help ease the hurt, and God will help heal the soul and help you be ready for a new one when the time is right,. don't try to replace this one by getting pregnant right away, give yourself and your husband a little time to greive first, but when the time is right don't be scared to try again. Good luck and God Bless you.

Answer 5

Oh Sweethearts, I hurt for you , I'm so sorry for your loss.
First you cry. It doesn't matter how far advanced your pregnancy was ---you suffered a loss, the death of your child.
It's OK to cry and to grieve-don't allow anyone to tell you differently.
Please don't grieve too badly for too long , don't wear your loss as a badge OK!
One day the sharpness will dull a little then a little more, and will be replaced by a sadness that will pop as you recall it.
Then remember that it is OK to let go and you are not being callous by not hurting so much any more.
Day by day Sweethearts, day by day.
Go on with your daily life as much as possible-feel the hurt , then let it go. When the grief stings again feel it -then let it go ---
gradually the pain comes less and less often And that's OK ! Lovingly , Bemo

Answer 6

i once miscarried at 5 months along. it doesnt matter when you miscarry, its you want the baby, so it is always hard. all you can do is look forward to trying again and take it easy next time. sorry to hear about your loss. but god has his reasons. somethign was wrong with this one. and the next could be perfect. miscarages happen when the body knows something is wrong with the baby and the baby would be better off not going full term. it is a sad case, but i guess its natures way of protecting some parents easyer to loose a fetus then a newborn.

Answer 7

honey losing a baby at any stage is devistating and for those who do not understand that need not to be part of your life right now. you need to seek some grief counseling. they can help you through this the right way. i have known many people who have lost their babies and they have never gotten over it. don't get me wrong the pain lessens and life goes on. but the love you have for that baby never goes away. you need to find out how to cope with this in a healthy way. and a grief counselor can provide that. don't go through this alone. join support groups, talk to your church, confide in a friend. just don't think that you are strong enough to do this alone. this is a pain no human should have to go through and don't let anyone discredit your grief. good luck to you honey and god bless you and yours. my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Answer 8

first of all let me say im so sorry for your loss.

i know this must be a very hard time for you, and most people think early miscarriages aren't anything because it was so early on, but trust me they would understand if it was them who lost a child. just remember this was NOT your fault, there was something wrong with how your baby was developing. and know that alot of women have miscarriages that go on to have healthy beautiful children. maybe God just had a different plan for you right now.

i will pray for you.

Answer 9

You can always try again. Be sure and get checked out to see if the cause of the miscarriage can be determined, so that next time you can take preventative measures.
My mother carried 4 babies full term, but 2 of them died at birth. She still mourns those babies, and she still visits their graves to leave fresh flowers for them.

Answer 10

Make another one.