If you have a teenager what age will you let her/ him have sex, Drink and make h/er/is own decisions?

Answer 1

teenagers make their own decisions even if the parents don't like it. Parents can only instill values and hope their teens wait until they are 18 to have sex. Just gotta make sure that they understand if they make the choice to have sex there are consequences

Answer 2

Well, sex should be a no-no until the teenager is an adult. It should be clear from the get-go that you expect her to stay a virgin until she is 18. Not because you are overprotective, but because you've spent years raising her and don't want to have to raise her baby too. However, I do believe that getting a teenage daughter on the pill at 15 is a wise decision. If not the pill than the ring or something. As long as the parent makes sure to tell the child that it is not an okay to go out and have sex, but as precaution. With rape being so incredibly popular these days, at least you can save your daughter from an unwanted pregnancy.

As for drinking, that's kind of iffy. It really depends on the child's maturity level. You have to realize that alcohol DOES affect brain development and our brains ARE still developing until around the age of 21. (Hence the current legal drinking age.) A beer/winecooler once in a blue moon (with parent supervision) shouldn't be a huge deal, but don't make a habit of it.

Making their own decisions will happen whether you allow them to or not. Children are constantly making their own decisions. You have to look at the big picture. Will this harm my child? If so, then it's a no. Will it cause my child to be distracted in school? If so, then it's a no. If it's something that isn't hurting anyone, and is a small trivial thing, let them decide. However, if it is a big deal, then you need to be the parent and make the decision.

Just remember, parents aren't meant to be friends.

Answer 3

No, as a parent it'll be my job to protect the child. Also as a parent you are held accountable for your child actions. I would not let my children have sex until they are 18 (which is the legal age) and if they do not live in my house, which ever one comes last. I would never let a young teenager drink unless they are 19-20 and it's with dinner or something like that. And to make their own decisions would be when I think they are capable of that responsibility, usually that's around 17-18, which is a perfect age to have tons of responsibility.

Answer 4

Its not a matter of letting them have sex, they are going to tell you there not doin it when they are anyway.
Just teach them to be safe...this day and age you have to get in about 12 or 13.
As far as drinking i wasnt allowed to drink until i was 17 (i had a baby at 16 so used the excuse if im old enough to have a baby i was old enough to have a drink)
I never got drunk though until i was 19 (18 been legal age here in oz)
Decision making...well that was when i was 16 for obvious reasons but my parents were always there to guide me.
Good Luck

Answer 5

A lot depends on them ie if not sensible or able to handle alcohol or too keen on it no alcohol.

I would want a kid to SLOWLY develop sexaul realtioshions from hugs and kisses to all the way over 1-2 years ... ke second base 14-16, 3rd base 15-17 all the way late 15-18
But understand people mature at different rates.

However I would bring kid up Dutch style with masses of sex and realtioshion ed even before pubity to prevnent problems and help them understand the opposite sex and assert themselves etc.

I would rather they go clubbing withtou the alcohol and or take it easy pre with somone slightly older, fun but responsible keeping an eye on things (note this is genuine not a bully)

Decision making would be long leash or dual controls in car style... enought rope to explore but pulled in before you walk infront of a bus.


With very harse relaity lessons ie trips to rehab centres, those awful screaming baby dolls etc

Answer 6

18

Answer 7

I'm 17 and My parents let me drink with their supervision or with the promise that if I drink without them I call them for a ride with no questions asked. I make some of my own decisions and i am sexually active (which my parents could do nothing about but I chose to wait until I found somebody I cared about and who cared about me and until I was positive the relationship wasn't going to be, or wasn't already based on sex) but my mom did help me get protected so I won't get pregnant.

I don't know if it's a matter of Letting your teenager do something, or enabling your teenager to decide when the right and wrong times to do something are.

Talk to the teenager, see what they think and know then come up with a mutual agreement on everything that you both can stick to

Answer 8

to be honest, they are going to find a way to do what they want if you don't let them at the age they want to start. sex and drinking, my parents didnt know i wasnt a virgin til i was 18, and they didnt know i had drank til a few months ago. they still don't know everything i did. the best thing to do, in my opinion, would be to find out where they are on it. ask them, point blank, if they have had sex and if they have drank. make sure you let them know you're not trying to lecture them, you just want to have an open talk with them, as adults. if they believe you view them as capable of making adult decisions, and acting responsible enough, they will be easier to talk to, and more apt to tell you the truth. there is no certain age, every teen is different. you cant ban a teen from sex- trust me, its not possible. if they are, a female needs birth control, and both need advice on safe sex- from the parents, not their friends, or teachers.

example:
my parents never had "the talk" with me, never wanted to think of me as anything other than a big kid. i skipped school, rolled pills, smoked, smoked pot, got drunk, huffed anything with a smell, had sex, had anorexia, had severe depression, became a pathological liar (for one very bad year), cut myself, and attempted suicide several times, all before i graduated high school. my sister shared in my endeavors. my brother, on the other hand, doesnt drink, doesnt have sex, doesn't skip or anything- my parents learned their lesson with me. i do believe that if my parents had talked to me about it, i wouldnt have done so much.

Answer 9

Well, no matter what any parent says, their teenager isn't going to listen to them. So the question really doesn't matter about what age would I let my child do anything like that.

I would instill in my child that it isn't right to have sex until you're ready to deal with the possible consequences of your actions-pregnancy, STD's, etc.

I would also let my child know that his/her father and I would not tolerate drinking under the age of 21 (or whatever the legal age is depending on what state you're in) and that if he/she so happens to find themselves in jail due to drunk driving, they better be willing to sit there the alloted time they're given to think about what they've done.

I don't think you should be having sex or drinking until you're ready to accept the penalties for what you've done if you happen to get into trouble for it.

Answer 10

Well, if I were a parent (I'm only 19, so I'm not yet...not until I'm out of college), I would tell you that you can't really "forbid" sex. If you make anything seem like a "forbidden fruit" it's going to make them want it even more. I actually only had sex for the 1st time a couple of months ago. My mother had always told me about safe sex and her personal experiences with sex/drugs/drinking/etc. She didn't hide anything from me and she didn't forbid it. When I showed her that I was responsible, I was allowed to make more and more decisions for myself. I'm glad she shared her experiences with me ever since I was a young girl....it helped me make better decisions. I learned from her mistakes.