Ok really need guidance here....Please tell me why its so hard for me to finally end things?

Question

Am I just a selfish and cruel person?

Answer 1

No one who is searching and questioning is being selfish. You're trying to understand and reach a state of calm with what's going on inside you emotionally Kat.
What tugs at you is one of two things or both.
1.) You still have feelings for him
2.) You feel like you've failed
The only choice that matters is what you think is right and what's right for your family.

Answer 2

No you're not selfish or cruel but that feeling of failure when something doesn't work out really sucks. People by nature want things to work out. They feel they have personal responsibility when things don't.

I think too that maybe you're still having some feelings for this person and thinking you can make everything work in a relationship that just doesn't work. because you think somehow that if YOU had done things differently or if YOU had just been more loving or if YOU... etc etc.. when really, it's not about you probably. Sometimes it just doesn't work out..

How long has it been? If it's still fresh, then it's normal to feel like crap. I know personally.

Answer 3

Are you talking about ending things as in a relationship? It is hard for us to sometimes let go. Its a selfish thing, yes, but not really a bad thing. Most people don't like it when a relationship ends. We don't like to think that we have lost someone we care about. You just need to learn to let go. But I don't think you are cruel.

Answer 4

Sometimes people get stuck in a situation and can not see things clearly enough to be able to get out...any relationship that had or has love and mutual respect is going to be hard to end..caring, loving and understanding someone that you have shared a life with is probably one of the hardest things to end and you definitely want to take the time to be sure there are no other alternatives left, these decisions are life altering ....

Answer 5

Kat, I don't think that you are selfish or cruel. I think sometimes even when we know we should move on its still frightening. Endings are always hard, I think we start to think about all that was good and we start to question why we decided to leave. Maybe you still care which will make it harder. I always go with my heart and my gut feelings. These decisions are not easy, my heart is with you. Good luck!

Answer 6

Oh, darling! I particularly have been there! it form of feels that the partitions are ultimate in, you have not have been given anybody that is familiar with, and anybody seems to think of which you're basically feeling sorry for your self. that's an ailment and could be dealt with staggering away. Your existence has a objective. each and every existence does. in spite of this submit, it basically is going to teach which you (or whomever you're writing approximately) nevertheless holds out desire that help could be gained. do not matter on others to develop you (or whoever) into action. PLEASE call the suicide hotline or a relied on buddy or a minister which you believe. no you could help feeling this way. it incredibly is basically that existence is complicated. it could look like an excellent activity just to get away from mattress ordinary, in spite of the shown fact that it occurs. We get away from mattress and start up an entire new day. even in spite of the shown fact that the luggage we inventory day by day could be complicated to permit circulate of, yet you do not could desire to permit the luggage weigh your concepts down at each and each given 2d of the day. Take it (sorry to sound cliche') sooner or later at a time. If it particularly is too complicated, then take it one hour at a time, and despite if it particularly is too complicated, take it 2d by 2d. This helped me whilst i presumed that i had to end all of it and not be a burden to others. You (or whoever) have a existence properly worth residing. once you (or whoever) gets medical care and start to experience greater suited, you need to use your(or whoever) tale to motivate others to not circulate it on my own. melancholy could be dealt with effectively and individuals that have it circulate directly to stay long, finished lives. That kin you so love, permit somebody recognize what you experience. because of the fact they love you they're going to see which you're in want of help and that they are able to get you began on the main appropriate street to restoration. I desire you properly, and desire which you seek for the help you like.

Answer 7

im sure your looking out for others i doubt your selfish and cruel but i could be wrong

Answer 8

end things as in a relationship?? If this is the case, you are probably afraid of being alone or changing your mind.

Answer 9

that's never an easy thing to do.

Answer 10

fear of failing.