are guys the same way? for instance im jealous of this girl i used to be friends with.. Shes pretty, shes has lots of money and a nice car. She gets lots of attention to and i hate her now! How do i get over this competition?
2007-08-12 07:16:26 · 11 answers · asked by Jilled 1 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Yeesh! you said a mouthful. It would be impossible to answer that whole thing here with just a simple paragraph, but I can recommend a GREAT book on the topic: Odd Girl Out by Rachel Simmons.
I'll summarize for the benefit of the question, but there are really WAY too many contributing factors to express without reading a whole book:
1) Dysmorphic body image and inappropriate personality roles are glorified in both popular media and by peers.
2) Forced monogamy in society causes inappropriate competition for resources.
3) Overt and covert messages that women are inferior to men and must therefore be subservient causes additional inappropriate competition.
4) Collective mob mentality causes "gang" style behavior (I am vulnerable and need the protection of others of my kind) but then reinforces reactions where mob rule overcomes individualism.
"Getting over" all of this is very tough because it requires a lot of introspection and there is pore likely to be more support for going along with the typical group mentality than just being yourself.
Break free from what society has pigeonholed you to be and find people who are of the same mindset. The good news is that for that, other restrictions like age and race are unimportant. Someone who is wise can be from any walk of life. Surround yourself with intelligent, open-minded individuals and you'll go much further than running with the mob of mundanes.
2007-08-12 07:30:37 · answer #1 · answered by Dominus 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes, guys are the same way, basically the same things, looks, money, attention. I think most humans like to think of themselves as the ultimate, sexy, wealthy, object of everyone's admiration, affection, attention. Why? Validation of their "uniqueness" in a world populated by billions of other attractive, wealthy, happy people.
Everyone succumbs to envy and jealousy at one time or another in their lives. Being happy with what you have, truly happy, means not caring what's going on in everyone else's life. They aren't you, not paying your bills, they don't really care. Once you've done that, everything else will fall into place.
2007-08-12 08:55:02 · answer #2 · answered by Yankee Micmac 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i hate the fact that girls overreact over their looks. actually, those kind of girls are out of their heads. there's more to life than clothes and make-up and being better than everyone. i think ur fine just the way u r. this is why i like hanging out with boys the most cuz they're easier to talk to.
2007-08-12 07:26:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes guys are the same way most of the time. some more than others. money is nothing forget about it. it doesnt buy happniess. i think you shoud pick a time to talk to her and tell her. see if she doesnt reveal alot about herself annd make an effort to help u over come it. noone wud be a better help than her in this situation
2007-08-12 07:27:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
by been a good friend.. it not bad to be jealous as long as it is in a good way.. sometime im jealous of my bf cuz she haves everything but im happy for her because she deserves it because she is the BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD!!! and she deserves it!..... and i tell her like i ENVY u... but in a good way and shes like dont be silly i envy u! and we r just happy for each other and i see all the good things in her that she doesn't see in her self and she in me... we just love each other no matter what!
2007-08-12 08:46:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get over it by realizing that you can have all the things she has and more if you just work hard for it! She gets attention that you crave.
2007-08-12 08:36:16 · answer #6 · answered by lilbitt_637 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By focusing on things that are more important than how you look, how much attention your getting.... where your treasure is there your heart will be also.
2007-08-12 07:20:11 · answer #7 · answered by think_of_the_bubble 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Find a boyfriend you who 1) is not at all attracted to her and 2) satisfies you sexually.
:-)
2007-08-12 07:20:55 · answer #8 · answered by Buying is Voting 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey money and luxury never be the same every where shine with ur knowledge and attract everyone and may be she may be one amoung them
2007-08-12 07:20:26 · answer #9 · answered by DALTON 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think to get over this jealousy, u need to start loving ur life and not hers. she may have all that stuff, but u need to think of things in your life that u love and that she doesn't have. i think that'll make u happier.
2007-08-12 07:22:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋