I miss my wife too much, i am getting into a depression state just thinking tht she has left me?

Question

She left me last yr for a job overseas. I am raising my 1 yr old son. She said she will only be in overseas for a yr. She changed when i got into trouble with business. Now she says i did nt tell her everything abt my business and i hv nt truthfull to her. Well, i never in the 1st place talk abt work to her even before when we were dating...I done get tht. Anyway,she just left without saying anything and she says will be back. If it was nt bcos of my son, she wont come back. She says she has lost her love towards me. I dnt get that. How can u lose yr love just bcos i got screwed in business . My question is how can a woman just loose her love towards her husband of 1 yr of marraige. Does nt make sense. I love her like crazy and she says she lost the spark...its only one yr..i cant stop thinking tht she might be going out with another guy and tht thought is KILLING ME....i get too deppresed thinking abt tht every night. I just dont knw wht to do. My son is my only consolation.Pls advise

Answer 1

My wife left me after 16 years of marriage, no warning, she "fell out of love".

My advice, get a lawyer, see if you can claim abandonment, and get full custody of your son.

If I had my child, I could care less about her.

Answer 2

At least you found out early that if problems arise, she won't stand behind you! To me that's not real love to even decide to go abroad and leave you with your child! Sweetie, don't let it drag you down like that! Now you have to pull yourself together for your own sake, and your child's! NOBODY is worth fretting over like that. She has the problem, not you. When she comes back, have a mature conversation about the problems and seek counseling if she will. If it ends in divorce, pretty sure you'd end up with the son since she basically deserted him, but you have to show you are mentally able to cope with him. It's not safe or healthy for a child to be around a depressed person. In the meantime, find someone to talk with, either professional psychologist, minister, or close friend and family. Hang in there! Are you also trying to get your life back on track and fix the problems you had with your business? One step at a time and you can get your life back in sync! Good luck!

Answer 3

I just read Twizzle's answer and so I am going to edit mine to say that I believe that it is of the utmost importance that you follow his/her advice concerning talking with a lawyer right away to establish the fact that she has abandoned her son. Don't delay. At least get it documented, and if you file for divorce now you may get full custody. If you wait until she returns, you probably will not get much, I'm sorry to say. I know you don't want to lose your son in addition to your wife. You should protect yourself and your child now.

I am so sorry that you and your son are going through this extremely painful situation. May I suggest that you make an appointment with a family counselor or psychologist? A counselor can help you sort through the facts, confront your wife, and make decisions that need to be made. Sometimes, when you are in an emotionally stressful situation like yours, you can't really see things clearly. At that time an impartial listener can be of immense help.
I'm so sorry... But, things will get better. I promise.

Answer 4

I would think there is a good chance there is someone else, cuz I don't really see how she can just fall out of love with you after a year. Plus she is overseas so who knows whats going on over there. I like the full custody thing suggested by someone. You're just in a bad place right now and it will pass. You'll get past the heartache, then it'll be you and your kid, then you'll be back in the game! Heartache sucks though, keep your head up. You shouldn't want to be with her anyway, with her leaving her family behind and all.

Answer 5

First, i congratulate you on loving your wife. Usually the word marriage puts end to the word love. It becomes more like a social contract. An insurance pact without much of returns. Now let's more to the issue of depresson. You have to keep in mind that you have a little baby with you who has to be around a parent who can handle himself. You really don't want to get into depresson as this may have many negative efffects on your little one. You must seek medical help as soon as possible.
As of your wife leaving you... Well, let's face it. She is not here wit your right now and if she says she has lost the spark and doesn't love you any more, be happy that she said it rather than keeping it inside. there are many spouses who share this feeling but never tell their partner. this is more dangerous as you never know what he/she is thinking.
You just have to realize that yes it was your fault for not sharing your business with your wife. when you become husband/wife you have to share almost everything with each other. i am pretty sure that she is more sad about you not telling her about your business rather than your business hitting bad terms.
Don't assume anything at this time [her dating someone else] as this will harm only you and your health. And if she, being your wife, is dating someone else while still married to you, she doesn't deserve your love. The kind of love you have for her, is very hard to find. This is probably after a long time i came across someone who used the word LOVE for his wife. There may always be somene else better worthy of this love.

ps: take care of your little one. You have to be strong, for your child & YOURSELF

Answer 6

you got pregant, got married, been married a year, she's been gone a year, and she sais she has lost the spark. It sounds like she never had the chance to be your wife!!!! She was over seas the entire marriage. If she is that self centered anyway, and only loved you for the money your buisness brang then forget it. You don't deserve the whench anyway. Or she just may come home, you two will talk and she'll fall in love all over with you again!! hope it works out for y'all :)

Answer 7

Sorry to hear that but your wife maybe wasn't mature enough to get married it seems to me that she is making excuses to not be with you and maybe that could be in the best interest and you are going to have to move on for you and your son's sake it is sad but some people are just that way unless she is willing to work it out but what would ever make her want to take a job overseas away from her family especially you and her son sorry but it is time to put everything on the table

Answer 8

Keep on walking, knock, seek and you will find the answer toward the void. Go on be faith full within you... the guide is in you be stronger and stand the life for your son. I remember, all of the activity in sport, such as soccer, baseball, football, jogging, tennis, and boy-scouts. It has tough me to go on whatever fall, down, hurt, lost the race. Hey that applies the applications in life as well. Be creative get business to change quickly follow up to speed make is worthily in cause and find the answer the to overcomes the doubts. You know what, when she comes back and you finish the job to avoid the pit fall, she will have faith in you more.

Answer 9

While I would love to see your marriage work out, I am afraid of what she might do when she gets back.

I don't know where you are living, but lets say you are in the USA.

If she comes back--and she says she will come back because of your son--are you sure she will be coming back to stay with you? Or to come back long enough to play the perfect mother, file for divorce, and fight to get custody of your son, while you only get visitation rights?

If this is her plan you are only going to get deeper into pain if you only get visitation rights of your son.

You may want to start consulting a lawyer right now for divorce so that you can be sure that the fact that she left her son to go overseas is on record and they will see that you are the primary care-taker of your son.

I am sorry I am advising this, as I do wish for you to be able to get your wife back... but just because you are so wanting her to be back with you, you might get tricked into a worse situation if she knows she has the upper hand.

say you do give her a good scare like seeking for divorce where she will know she will lose custody of your son--and she asks for you to work things out--I highly suggest you demand the two of you go to marital counseling and to protect yourself from this ever happening-that she sign a post-nuptial agreement where you get to take custody of your son if she wants to divorce in the end.

Answer 10

This sounds terrible, I am very sorry for you. Whatever the reason your wife doesn't love you, the fact remains that she says she doesn't want to be with you. You really need to try to think about your son and yourself and forget her.

I know this sounds cold and harsh but, your little son loves you very much and in time you will realize it's much better than being with a woman who does not love you, whatever her reason is.

I know that you took your marriage vows very seriously, or you wouldn't be asking for help. unfortuneatly, there are a lot of people who do not. People make mistakees all the time, and I think most people make mistakes with marriages and relationships. I don't believe people think it through, they go only on emotion and that is not a good way to keep a marriage. But, that is just me.

I am not trying to be hurtfull with my words, they are just what I believe and I think true. I really hate to see people suffer but, I think, in your case you really should move on.

You need to find something better to think about. Play with your son and get together with family and good friends.

I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 11

you need to get over it. get a life, and move on. its not about you or her anymore. its about that little boy who needs love, direction and guideness from a paent of a sound mind. so what she moved overseas. its probably is the best thing that could have happen to you. now you know not to lie or keep important information from the next person you get involved with. she has move on and so should you. stop sitting around having a pitty party. go out with some friends, and family. do some self maintenance, get a haircut, hell color your hair. do something that you always wanted to do but didnt. you are free to meet and mingle. enjoy this time alone. it sounds like she has moved on. its not the end of the world. GodBless