Why do women choose to bottle feed over breastfeeding? Why dont women fight back against outlawing the breast?

Question

::iam NOT trying to sound like a le leche freak, or post holier than thou questions::

Health reasons aside, why choose bottles over breast?

I jsut got done reading something with the world census thing, and doing a little research. America has the HIGHEST infant mortality rate of all the industrialized nations. Thats insane, and they say its because all other countries tend to have much higher rates of breastfeeding verses formula.

I think its unfair that hospitals and doctors dont provide education and support to moms. Every mom wants to provide the very best, and its not fair that commercial entities and cultural taboo's are allowed to steal the best from our children.

On top of all that, some states and counties are MAKING IT ILLEGAL to nurse in public.. WTF?!

It just bothers me that we cant provide the best.

People in saudi arabia have healthier babies than us for cripes sake. Theres something wrong here.

Honestly i have to admit that I decided to nurse because it was cheaper. It wasnt until my son was born and I was crying in pain with every feeding that I researched it and found out how good it is and decided to tough it out.

So its not like I did it for his sake in the start. I was just one of those uneducated masses. Because no one offers education on this stuff. I had to google it on my own.

Answer 1

Bless you for writing this!
I made a big mistake with our son and breastfeeding/colic
I was uneducated with our son- though I thought I was. He took right to breastfeeding. He did well- but he had colic while I was nursing him. I changed my diet, watched what I ate- and still he had colic. I was told by our ped. at that time that "breastfed babies don't get colic". He handed us some soy formula and said "this will work." So, I listened- BIG MISTAKE- HUGE!!! Our baby cried for 5 hours when I was nursing him every night. On soy- he cried for 18 hours a day. I didn't know that you could put them back on the breast. I didn't know that the breastmilk would make it easier for him with colic. I had thought it was me and my milk that was causing him problems. I swore that any baby that we had following would be breastfed- and have done so. Our baby is just a year old and is still breastfed- 3 times a day. She has only been sick one time- she caught pink eye from me. She is far ahead on the charts for development.

So, some of it is lack of education.
Some of it is our perception of breasts in America- they are veiwed as "sexual objects" instead of as what they are for- to feed our babies.

Women are frowned upon for nursing past the first year.
Women are frowned upon for nursing in public. I will nurse our baby when and wherever she needs to eat.

For some women it is hard to nurse- they have pain. It is NORMAL and it passes.

Others have milk supply issues- these can be fixed. Still, it is O.K. to combine formula with breastmilk once baby is on the breast and is accostomed to the feeds.

Breastfeeding is easy- it is always ready.

Initially, babies want to nurse all the time. THIS PASSES! The first 6 weeks are the hardest- but it goes so fast.

I guess if I lived in an area that had laws passed not to nurse in public, I would get arrested. I have heard people say, "Nurse in your car." Sure- in 95 degree heat- IS THAT WISE??? Or, here in NY- in the freezing cold. Crazy!

Or: Nurse in the bathroom- nice- would you want to eat in a smelly bathroom???

Once, when nursing our baby in Toys R Us a family from India passed- they had a 5 month old baby and an older son. The dad and I had a nice talk- as I sat there covered and nursing our baby who was only 8 weeks old. He said that in his country women who are nursing are worshipped because they are passing on the next generations health and well-being. He told me not to hide in an aisle. I felt so good after talking to him and his wife. He was offended by the views on women who nurse in this country- and could not comprehend it.

Likewise, it is frowned upon to nurse here in public- when nothing can be seen. I had that experience recently- and it's the very thought that a baby is nursing under a blanket that is just a horrid thought to some- ridiculous! I receive more dirty looks from women than from men.

Many doctors are also not pushing breastfeeding- as did ours 10 years ago. If someone had told me, "he has colic- but he'd have it anyway, KEEP NURSING..." I would have. I didn't have the support or the internet to help.

NOTE: I work full-time and have been nursing for a year- I pump 3 times at work and once before I leave. Both babies were tongue-tied- our youngest still is and nursed fine.

So...good for you for bringing this up- and thanks for listening!

Answer 2

You are absolutely right, unfortunately their is very little education given to women about breastfeeding and lack of support to a majority of women who have every intention to breastfeed, but may have some difficulties along the way. Many women mistake growth spurts for low milk supply, or think that babies should be sleeping a whole night by the time they are 6 weeks old..something must be wrong!?

Look at the ads in magazines, specifically parenting magazines and you see ads for formula, flip on the television mid day and you see an ad about formula, have a baby and you automatically receive coupons and free samples for formula given to you in the hospital. And to top it off a lot of doctors tell women, if you are not able to breastfeed or if you just need a break from it, need more sleep, etc... you can always formula feed. No wonder so many women formula feed. We are given the wrong information!

Their are wonderful support groups out there, such as la leche league, the WIC program and lactation consultants that can help but many women do not know that such things exist or worse have a baby at 3 am and if you are lucky you may get a nurse who knows what a proper latch is, otherwise you have to wait until the next day to get help from another nurse or a lactation consultant who may or may not be booked for the day.

It is extremely sad, that third world countries do not have problems with SIDS and here in America we do. It is extremely sad that women are more concerned about their bust size and shape than to feed their babies with superior nutrition called breast milk. What is even sadder, is that here in America we have the some of the highest rates of breast and ovarian cancer. Breastfeeding helps lower the risk of these types of cancers and the longer a woman breast feeds, the lower the risk. Their is research to prove these facts, but the general public does not know about it.

It is also sad that for women who are taking medications with unknown side effects if they are unable to go to another safer medication that they have to go to formula. More money to the pharmaceutical industries...Why would they spend the money on research, they are getting paid for not only the medication but also for the formula. Very sad indeed.

This is a very good post. Kudos to you for posting it and good luck to you and your baby.

Answer 3

It concerns me so much that breast vs. bottle puts mom against mom.

I strongly believe every mother wants the best for her child. I consider myself to be an educated woman (I have my B.A.) and always knew I would breastfeed.

However, while in the hospital, where they provided excellent breastfeeding support, the pediatrician informed me that breastfeeding may not be the best decision. I take medication that can pass into breast milk and the consequences, if any are unknown. Knowing that I wanted the best for my child I couldn't continue a practice that might cause him harm in the future.

Women who take medicine daily are put in a very difficult position and drug companies don't help at all since they chose not to spend money on drug/breast milk research. We're too small a portion of the population!

So many argue that bottle feeding is convenient and that a partner can help with the feedings. Although this is true, formula is very expensive and mixing, heating, washing, sterilizing are very time consuming.

Based on my own experience though I will never judge another mother no matter how she is nursing her baby in public.

Breast or bottle it is so important that we support each other in our parenting. Let's not judge each other before knowing another's story. I find I am embarrassed to bottle feed my son in public because it feels more taboo that breastfeeding.


No state or country should make breastfeeding in public illegal. Perhaps public displays of affection should be targeted before a natural act. This is just another example of ignorance and we can all help educate others!!

Answer 4

I bottle fed too. It just worked better for me. I actually just typed out all of my reason, but then I erased them because I am tired of justifying why I bottle fed. It is really none of anyone else's business. I think many moms have a great experience with breastfeeding and want to encourage it in others. Some moms really suffer with it and then they feel as though they are superior to moms who quit. It is better for the baby. However, I think at the end of the day, every mom feels insecure about the overwhelming task of creating and raising a new human and if you can criticize someone else's choice it makes you more confident in your own. Just wait. There are a group of judgmental moms ready to tell you why all of your decisions are wrong. Every issue has a side and women ready to lecture you on why their choice is the only choice - family sleeping, crying it out, working or not, starting solids, potty training, preschool - you name it and someone is ready to give a sermon on it. But by the time you get to that point most new moms have developed a thicker skin and it rolls off. Good Luck!

Answer 5

I think its a personal decision. But I don't think that women should be ashamed or looked down upon for simply breastfeeding in public. There are times and situations where you can't find a babysitter or you don't have support or whatever and you just have to take the baby with you. So what are the mothers supposed to do let their children strave until they return home just for the sake of appearances and so you wont get dirty looks or whisphers. Thats completely ludicrious to outlaw breastfeeding in public. So I guess that outlaws taking out small children becuase oooooooh they may actually need to be fed which may lead to breastfeeding. Its just stupid. No one should put anyone else down because they breastfeed or viseversa. As long as they are being feed, healthy, getting proper nutrition and are happy then people just need to get over it. People are too judmental and don't have the facts or know someones situation but yet are content with sitting and gawking at a mother breastfeeding her child. I am not a parent but it still upsets me that people can be so narrow minded or judmental. Its not their place to judge. When I'm a mother and if I have biological kids ( I plan to adopt) and I breastfeed out in public ( if its legal lol) I wont be ashamed or embarassed. I'd like to see someone judging me thats eating and go up to them and go " ahhhhhh the agony, the shame, the inhumanity !!!!!!! Eating..... in public. But yet you judge me for feeding my child?!" Then walk away lol. Anyways best of luck and I agree with you on some points.

Answer 6

"Because no one offers education on this stuff."

Not true. The formula companies do.

If you're really curious, sign up for some of the Nestlé (etc) marketing.

In their literature, breast/bottle is all 'a choice'! A sentiment you'll see echoed in the breast-vs-bottle threads here. It's a choice! Just like, say, using meth while pregnant -- a choice, it's all about freedom of choice...

The pictures in the Nestlé propaganda show breastfeeding as pretty weird-looking, too -- Mom doesn't have a nursing bra or anything, just two massive jugs spilling out; she has to hold one in unflattering fashion and point it at the baby. The bottle-feeding mother has a pretty pink top and is snuggling her baby (as opposed to looking like she's going to commit baby assault by smothering him with said jug) while feeding him with a _matching_ pink bottle. Breast-feeding is, like, ew!

Breast-feeding is "best," according to Nestlé, but it's amazing how many benefits it loses. It's pretty expensive to get all the nursing gowns, nursing tops, nursing bras, breast pads, pumps, ointments, etc, that every nursing mother will desperately need. And I got the distinct impression from reading their stuff that nursing means Dad is standing in the corner hating on baby if he can't thrust a bottle at baby.


Edit: sadly, their site doesn't have the lewd pix their mailing does, but it still hints at the general tone:

"Use a favourite armchair or rocking chair and have a few supplies on hand:

A nursing pillow to support your baby in your lap
A nursing stool to elevate your feet and ease the strain on your back"

http://www.nestle-baby.ca/EN/baby_feeding_care/breast_feeding/breast_feeding_basics

EEK I don't have a special stool and special pillow! I CAN'T BREASTFEED!

And:

"Expressing breast milk also allows other family members to be involved in the feeding ritual. It’s also easier than many think, and with practice can be performed quickly and easily – even by hand."

http://www.nestle-baby.ca/EN/baby_feeding_care/breast_feeding/expression

Yeah, uh... In other words: "Mothers, PLEASE get used to using BOTTLES. Eventually, you'll see that 'sample' can of formula we sent, and -- wow, won't that be easier...? Even Dad can do it!"

Answer 7

some women cant breast feed,and i was one of them with my 2nd child.she was not feeding properly and losing weight,the more i worried the less milk i produced.with my 3rd i did not have the time to sit for upto 45 mins waiting for my baby to feed on my breast when i had other kids to get ready for school.i could time to the minute with the bottle when my son needed one and it was so much easier with going out etc.breast is not always the best if it makes the mother feel under stress to how much their babies are getting.i am pregnant again and going to try it again and if i fail again i wont feel guilt like i did last time i tried.if it works then fine but if not then each to their own i say!

Answer 8

I have two sons.
I was 19 when I had #1 (J). I had left my two-timing ex- husband, and was living with my Aunt and her family. My Aunt had been an L & D nurse for about 15 years, and was the office nurse for the OB I was seeing. My Aunt was very supportive and encouraged me to learn as much as possible about all the stages of my pregnancy and what would come after. She encouraged me to Breast Feed and helped learn what I needed to do to prepare for it. She coached me through the first six weeks, encourged me through the pain and was just wonderful. It was the most rewarding thing for me. I was an early bloomer (I NEEDED a bra by the time I was 11), and I wore a D cup when I got married. I had "t1ts" that the guys would comment on, and wanted to get their hands on. Providing nourishment for my child helped me "see" my "breasts" for the first time. It did a lot for my self image, especially after the emotional blow from my ex. I was able to nurse him until he was 9 months old. I moved back home, got some training and got a job.

I met some one new and I was 22, almost 23 when son #2 was born.(P) I don't know if it was arrogance (I have allready done it once) or just plain foolishness, but I did not go into learning all over about not just pregnancy, but breast feeding and birth. I did not take any classes, I didn't ask questions, and I didn't look into the hospital where I was going to give birth. My birth was a miserable experience, I had a hard time getting the hang of nursing, and I did not do much to prepare my body for nursing, so I cracked and bled. It was all I could do not to scream when he latched on. I called my OB, but he wasn't very supportive. I was determined and I perserveered, and by the time he was 6 weeks old, I was once again comfortably providing nourishment for my child. Then my maternity leave was up. This was before FMLA and I couldn't take any more time off. (I was off work at 8 1/2 months until 6 wks pp) I had bought a pump and I was going to pump and store for when I was gone and then nurse as much as possible. The pump wasn't a very good one, and I had a hard time collecting even 2 oz at a time. I couldn't pump at work, because I had time to either eat or pump, not do both, and I really didn't have a place I could go and pump. So he ended up taking formula when I wasn't there. Eventually, it seemed each time I tried to nurse, he was more reluctant to latch on, until at 2 1/2 months, he refused. He was screaming, and turning his head. I tried for 30 minutes to coax him to nurse, before I finally gave him a bottle. The next time he needed to feed I tried again, with the same results. It broke my heart. I switched entirely to bottle and formula.

With J, I had time and support. I stayed home with him and it went well. With P, I thought I knew what I was doing, and didn't seek help until it was too late.

I work with a several women who have had babies in the last two years. Most have to come back to work, the cost of living here is too high to live on one salary. When they do come back, they often work part time. Working in a Hospital, they can use the high quality breast pumps on the maternity floor free of charge, they just need to have their own attachments. Even then, it is hard for most to breast feed past six months. I do feel there is more benefit for nursing your baby, even for a little while, and that It should be encouraged more. Women need to "see" their "breasts" and not just their "t1ts".

Women who either chose not to nurse or cannot for medical reasons, shouldn't be condemmed either. Mothers need to stand together for healthy babies, not fight over how heathy babies are fed. The Key word being Healthy. Health care for all mothers and babies and children might go a long way to bringing down the mortality rate.

Answer 9

Personally I believe it's the woman's decision...I've had 4 children and breastfed 1 for his entire first year. I was 18 when I got pregnant for the 1st time and 19 when I gave birth...breastfeeding wasn't something I felt I could devote myself to at the time. Some women physically can't breastfeed...my step sister for one tried soo hard to breastfeed and just could not produce enough milk and her son wasn't getting enough so the doc told her to switch to formula. Other women work very hard and it's just not possible for them to get to their child at every feeding and some children won't take a bottle if it's breast milk or formula inside of it...my son I breastfed wouldn't touch a bottle even if there was breastmilk in it. I don't think any woman should be judged on their decision.

Answer 10

honestly i wouldn't choose bottle feeding over breastfeeding, i have to give up breastfeeding because i dried up and this was nursing exclusively when my son was 3 months. i cried so hard and then we found out that he was lactose intolerant. we have definetly noticed a difference in his behavior, i still let him latch on and comfot nurse.
to all mothers that breastfeed, stand up and just do it in public, you are giving nurishment to your child and why should that be illegal,
a lot of the reason why other children are healthier as well is because they don't eat as much fast food. did you know that in the USA, the number one vegetable for a 1 1/2 year old is french fries. that is definetly not the kids fault and no wonder why we have the highest obesity ratings.