Ok lot of people joke about being pregnant, but what about those who do and are just looking for answers?

Question

Cause when we look Y!A answers for answers and all we get is comments on oh this age or that age is too young to be doing this or this its the fact that we are teens and yes i myself messed up i made a mistake i had a baby at 15 who now i am the sole person that cares for him and people say you cant give a child a good future if you are this young yes you can all you have to do it TRY and talk to your parents when you find out

oh yeah i am so fat let me tell ya

sorry i aint on welfare never have been never will i work i live at my parents house i pay them to watch him and i pay rent i am trying to make it to where teen mothers can say hey look someone did it why cant I

and yes i am online you can just im me when you want

ok just because i use the word aint i get made fun of so great i have been called much worse by a lot more people k and second i never said it was something to celebrate its just that crap does happen ok and second at least i am trying to better myself and my sons. its like people feel the need to say oh look their is a teen mother or father they must be on welfare or whatever then don't stop to think that just cause it happened does not mean that some of us are not going to take responsibility for our actions

Answer 1

In our current Western culture, becoming a parent while a teenager is hardly recommendable, and this is because our society has no real system in place by which a teenager can support himself or herself, much less a child. A teenager in the USA normally cannot find living wage employment, nor can a teenager, in most states, get married if he or she is younger than 17. Aside from those two very daunting facts, most of our families are ill-equipped to handle a teenager bringing another child into the home. Typical American family finances are usually tight and both parents are most likely working.

Then, of course, there's our Victorian attitude that children are to be children, and thus cannot be expected to be responsible for anything which is "adult". This Victorian attitude incredibly effects our society because adults and parents take a half-hearted approach in educating and mentoring our teenagers. In America, we have a tendency to grant a gross moratorium to adolescence, sometimes to the age of 25. We do a disservice to our teens and ourselves when we don't provide our adolescents the knowledge and skills to mature, and also when we choose to avoid the sometimes uncomfortable tasks of teaching our boys and girls important moral lessons about love, respect of self and others, courtship, relating to the opposite sex, choosing a mate, sexuality, commitment to self and others, how to be an adult, how to work, how to be married and care for a family, etc.

Yet, the hard cold truth is this: yes, a teenage parent can handle the tasks of properly raising a child, but not by himself or herself. The teenager is going to require the support and dedication of his parents and others in his or her family. As long as there is a supportive family, a teenager can begin on the path of properly providing for his or her child, working towards a day when he or she can become independent through personal financial means or marriage. I truly recommend marriage over single parenthood, as it is good for a child to grow up in a home which has both a loving mother and father.

I hope I've been able to help or at least given you a thought-provoking answer. I am glad to hear you have taken such a proactive attitude in caring for and learning to care for your child. I am sure it has been difficult. I am also happy to hear you have a family which supports you, even if it's just moral support. Your life did not end because you had a child so young, nor should you think your life has been permanently "knocked off its rails". You are perfectly capable of raising your child, working, and even earning a high school diploma and a college degree. Let no one say you can't. Better yet, do not let yourself believe you can't!

Answer 2

You are right. Keep people around you who are positive and block everything else out. I had my first child at 16 and had alot of help from my parents. I was never on welfare. I worked and had help from my parents. I grew up in a married two parent household and I was told I wouldn't make it by my parent's snobby friends but I made it with the love and support of my family. I finished high school earned an A.A., B.A. and am now finishing my masters. You can do it. I am now married to my child's father and we have a beautiful home. You CAN do it. Don't allow anyone to hold you back!

Good Luck

Answer 3

Hun it sounds like there isn't much more you can do for her than you already have. i know it's going to be hard but you are going to have to sit back and let her learn her lesson once she learns she will see how wrong she was and she will come to you and when she does be there for her then and now, support her even when you disagree because that's what a good friend does. i'm sorry this guy is such a butt to your friend the only way he is going to go away is when she starts showing or when she has the baby either way he will be gone soon. as for him treating you as a dog, if he tells you "b**** move" move out of his way and time yourself right and stick your foot out in front of him if he shoves you come back fast and punch him in the arm or kick him! but if he is one of those guys that don't care if you aren't suppose to hit a girl then don't do that. you can always get him back by pushing him down a flight of stairs and saying it was an accident :) ha-ha jk don't do that. but you got to stand up for yourself just because your friend is putting up with his bull doesn't mean you have to too well i hoped i helped a little and best of luck to your friend and god bless you for having such a big heart! :):):)

Answer 4

I completely agree. I can't stand it when someone says they are "pro-choice," and then turn around criticize young mothers who chose to keep their kids. Or when someone says they are "pro-life" but insult women in crisis pregnancies. Either way it's so hypocritical! Unfortunately all you can do is ignore them. You are doing the right thing and I applaud you for giving your son the very best you can.
<3 Kelsey

Answer 5

All depends on the maturity of the girl...sometimes a baby is the making of a young girl...and i applaud the ones that look after the children themselves...

Answer 6

A fifteen year old having a baby is nothing to celebrate.

"A good future"? Depends on your perspective I guess.

Good Luck.

Answer 7

That's is really true. I had a kid when I was 14, I still am 14, and I have a beautiful 3 month old baby girl named Genevieve. I hate it when people say, "Oh, you're too young. She should of had an abortion," or "Oh, you need to give the kid up for adoption." Whatever, I am fully capable of raising my own kid.

Answer 8

true
my mom was 15 when she had my eldest brother
he's living a good life...not the best
but he's staying out of trouble

Answer 9

if ypou wamt real advice you either have to find a different forum then YA or you have to be willing to wade through alot if crap.

Answer 10

well,i know you can give your baby a good life, as long as you love your baby you can do it :)
and people who joke about being pregnant really really really need a life