Is it cheating if you & your husband slept with another couple?

Question

Not that we have but my husband and i are talking about if it's considered cheating if you "swap" with another couple and it's consitual.. what do you think..

Answer 1

Yes, you will be cheating yourself. Any psychologist will tell you, relationships that "swing" seldom last. There is too much emotion involved. Immediately after "swinging takes place comes the question......who was better? In which you will reply, "You of course". This will probably be a lie which now has brought dishonesty into your relationship and jealousy if you tell the truth. Those are 2 things that can destroy a perfectly good relationship. Think about it.....it's not worth it!!

Answer 2

Don't do it because to do so will be the begining of the end of your marriage. The intimacy you share with your husband in love will only be destroyed by placing others in it. If you cannot be enough for each other sexually no one on the outside will make it better. People have emotions and you are not in control of someone else's feelings.What if your husband becomes more attached to the other woman and prefers her over you or vice versa? What happens then? You won't ever know the truth about someones past histoy from years ago and what if you catch a life threatening desease that the other couple doesn't even know they are carring? It's a very dangerous game to play in this day and age. If two people are not married and everyone is single and agrees to swap...then it would not be cheating. If you are married you made a commitment to only be for one another because your emotions and feelings and intimacey are held sacred......if you both decide to swap they are no longer held in high regards between either one of you. This is only my opinion because I couldn't do it because I love my spouse to much and would probably be scared and jealous and I don't want to share but that's just me. If you are not sure if this is considered cheating for you and your husband why don't you both get some marriage counseling to see if this is what you both really want to do? I mean this in the best way because you don't want things to go bad if you really don't want it to. Take care and good luck.

Answer 3

consentual sex is not considered cheating. neither is a threesome, or moresome, for that matter. now, if either of you overstep your bounds and have relations without the other's knowledge, that would be cheating. but be careful in this situation. it could lead to heartache.

I knew a girl who stated that her husband brought home men for her to have sex with so he could watch. and then she got in over her head and was doing it with the partners behind her husband's back, and it ended in divorce. when you decide to have relations with someone other than your husband or wife, you run the risks of getting attached to another person, bringing a disease in, or ruining an otherwise "perfect" relationship. I, myself, would advise against such behavior, but do what you feel is right for you and your husband. (if it were me, and we just wanted more adventurous sex, I would incorporate toys or movies, or roleplaying. I don't feel that it's okay to bring another sex partner into your marriage, but again, that's just me.)

but to answer your question, if you are friends with another couple, and decide to "swap" partners, as long as all parties know what is going on at all times, then there is no cheating involved. (and if something comes up later about cheating, remind each other that everyone was involved, and it wasn't just one or the other.)

Answer 4

No, it would not be considered cheating if it is consensual with both of you an the other couple. However this could open a whole new line of issues for you. Make your choices carefully and be sure that you are not going to be compromising your marriage.

Answer 5

As a christian I would say you have sinned in the eyes of the Lord. That may not be important to you now, but hopefully some day it will! It shows that your relationship is not good. I would never cheat on my wife and I would never want another guy to be with her, nor would she want me to be with another women. I would say you both should sit down and ask each other where your marriage has gone bad and why! Fix it
or surely it is domed for failure!

Answer 6

Well, to me, even if it is described as "consitual," it is morally wrong and should be discourage in its entirety.

Marriage is a covenant between a husband and his wife - and both, according to God's law, are expected to be committed to each other, and not with any other individuals.

Good luck!

Derrick

Answer 7

It's Not Cheating Because You Both Know And Consent To It.
But It Does Tarnish The Sanctity Of Your Marriage..........

Answer 8

What happen if you like the other man's sexual experience better than your husband? Will you make excuses to stay on all the time? Or your husband like the other woman better than you? Or he tells the other woman that you are lousy in bed and she is a lot better than you? He can also stay on with that woman. What are the consequences when you two decided to go ahead with this idea of exchanging partners? Think hard before you decide. You may think its fun. I advise you not to go ahead.

Answer 9

Why on earth would you want to do that? Aren't you contented with your husband/vice-versa? I don't think it would be healthy for your marriage. It will just be a start of another problem like you getting jealous of the other woman. It may not be technically cheating bec. both of you approved of it, but still, if you respect your marriage vows, pls, reconsider.

Answer 10

I've read the other replies and a cpl of them made me laugh , swinging is not for everyone and its not cheating because your are both consenting adults as would be the other couple you choose to be with , how ever there can be ramifacations you dont expect , if you do this with your eyes as the movie was called "eyes wide shut" then your in for a lot of pain and suffering some things to ask yourself .....

1. why are you considering partner swap ?
2. what brought you and your partner to the final decision of considering it?
3. is your marriage / relationship strong enough emotionally?
4. have you ever been or felt jealous of your partner flirting , perving over another woman? or vice versa?
5. are you going into this to save a dying sexual relationship within your marriage ie: spicing it up because its gotten boring or less available from each other?
6. do you have ground rules before entering into this?
7. do you have boundaries that you have told each other you do not want crossed by each other?
8. are you in love with your partner and vice versa?
9. are you going into swinging to enhance your sexual hunger for each other ? or are you going into it because your just plain bored with what you have?

if you can answer these questions honestly without 2nd guessing yourself or wondering that you've answered the way he expects you to not the way you really feel you should then sit down and talk about it some more , there are a lot of swinging sites and groups email them ask for advice and find out information .....

I have known 1 couple who have spent 23 years swinging from the 1st year of their marriage and its worked wonderfully for them because neither is insecure , jealous , selfish or abusive to the other .....

how ever I know about 25 couples who's marriages have suffered or ended in divorce because of swinging leading to infedelity and cheating so if you have any doubts dont do it , buy some new toys some video's / dvd's , sexy outfits any doubts stay away because as much as you sit there and say yes we're strong enough to survive this and it will enhance our sexual appettite for each other and we might learn a few new ideas your asking for danger .....

good luck .....