My kids' father came to pick them up for visitation. Rather than parking in the driveway, he supposedly parks his car at a nearby Walgreens, and tells the kids to walk with him back to the car (suitcases and all)! The kids are obviously confused, so they don't follow him as he walks off. I tell them to get in the car, and I'd take them to where his car is. On the way, I see my soon-to-be ex walking, and asks him if he wants a ride because I'm late for an appt. He says no, and tells me to tell the kids to get out and walk like he told them to. I pull off, head to the Walgreens, and his car isn't there. I then call him, and tell him to get the kids from the where I'm headed. He tells me if I don't bring them to him he wasn't keeping them this weekend.
Something just didn't sit right with me about this whole situation, so I hung up and took the kids with me. He never came to get them.
I was only trusting my instinct, yet he now claims I'm interfering.
2007-08-11 15:42:13 · 46 answers · asked by MaknMeCrzy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That's very strange.
Why would he tell your kids that his car was at Walgreens and make them walk there (w/their suitcases), but then not have his car be there???
Something's not adding up, and I don't blame you for being suspicious. Better safe than sorry where your kids lives are concerned!
(I would definitely try to find out what's going on before the next time your kids have scheduled visitation with him. Most of the time, its important for kids to have their time with their father...however, the exception would be if something is going on where the kids might not be safe.)
2007-08-11 16:05:35 · answer #1 · answered by sarah314 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Document, and do so with total order of process and results. In other words...the date, the time, the EXACT occurrence. You may need this if ever full custody becomes an issue. There is something very disconcerting in your outline. When you say "he never came to get them" were you complaining, or were you concerned? I can't tell. Also you state that he came to pick them up but rather than parking in the drive, he supposedly "parks" his car at Walgreens. That makes it sound like this is an ongoing event, or did it happen only this one time? Your NUMBER ONE issue should be the PROTECTION and SECURITY of your children. NEVER in a million years would I have ALLOWED my children to be treated in this confusing manner. AT THE DOOR, I would have said "I'm sorry, but this is bizarre. They ARE NOT walking anywhere with you. At the moment, you are trespassing. If you want to see them, meet us at (a public eatery)." There is something very suspicious, something very wrong here. Don't rest...get to the bottom of it BEFORE his next appointed visitation.
2007-08-18 17:12:12 · answer #2 · answered by O2BQuiteRite 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My thought is he either lost his car or had someone else drive him. Either way the children would have said something after the fact. If he makes his visitation depended on his irrational behavior/request the they are better off not going. He wants to show the children that he is in charge, and he is angry because it didn't work. It's a shame at this time where they need love from both parents that he is the one playing games.
2007-08-18 11:08:30 · answer #3 · answered by dear_vern 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your number one responsibility is to your children. They also felt uneasy about his behavior and command. He didn't even care that they had luggage and didn't offer to help carry anything. Why would he just start walking away. He still wants control. I don't know what his real plan was/ what the real story was, but you don't know yet. Did he loose his job? Have his car repossessed/a ploy to get out of having them (a new romance?) so he would have more free time. Don't let him use them. Talk to a lawyer about a possible change in visitation rules.
2007-08-19 13:54:32 · answer #4 · answered by Cindy O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were in no way interfering. Those are your kids too. If he had communicated w/ you, none of that would have happened. You nor him are the ones that got hurt and confused by that whole bizarre affair. The kids did. Whatever he was/is hiding will come to light. You did the right thing, girl! Stay strong!
2007-08-18 20:49:36 · answer #5 · answered by Nae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he parked his car away from your house and walked to your house then asked the kids to follow him , refused a lift with you and his car wasnt parked where he said it was?
I'm sorry this sounds like some kind of kidnapping plan you were right to trust your instincts I would see a lawyer and ask advice
how are things normally with you and your ex husband? if they arent on good terms you have wonder what his plan was and your mothering instincts are the best to follow
and what exactly was he accusing you of interfering in? this isnt right
2007-08-17 00:58:04 · answer #6 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were right. You are there mother and it is your job to protect them. Make sure to tell someone else about this so you have a witness. If it ever gets to the point where he won't pick them up, maybe arrange a third party for drop off and pick up, like a friend, or even the local Salvation Army. I knew one woman who had to go there to meet her kids for visitation. I would also review any legal info you have to make sure you follow the rules for visitations, know your rights.
2007-08-11 16:25:29 · answer #7 · answered by jaimebird25 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing. That was so sketchy, and you were absolutely right to trust your instinct. Who cares if you were interfering - you are a mom, and it's your job to do everything to protect your kids. Your ex is obviously up to something, and it's a good thing that you didn't let the situation get out of hand.
2007-08-11 15:54:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I say that you were right to trust your instincts! I don't understand why he has them walk to his car at another location in the first place. It also doesn't make sense for him to threaten to cancel his visit if you don't abide by his odd requests. I'm not sure if this is just a control issue on his part, or something more sinister but your kids safety needs to continue to be your first priority.
2007-08-18 18:51:23 · answer #9 · answered by MoonGoddess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah he's up to something? I don't know why their is so much issues with ex's. My guess is maybe he didn't have his car, someone was picking them up and he didn't want you to see. Maybe their was someone in the car he didn't want you to see. I don't know why people hide things when it really doesn't matter. I think you were just being concerned I would wonder where my kids were doing or going if it didn't look right. I don't care to know anything except when things doesn't look right.
2007-08-11 19:35:19 · answer #10 · answered by Smile 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋