How would you go about this?

Question

Had lunch with a lady today,she was picking her teeth at the table and really reaching into the back teeth,I offered her a toothpick thinking she would go to the ladies to use it,she used it at the table then started cleaning her nails with it,I was speechless.

she has her own teeth it was a family member,thats why I dont know how to handle it

Answer 1

Hey, she ain't no lady! I had a similar experience at a BBQ when my father in-law put his feet up on the table and started to pick his toenails. I handled it by throwing a bowl of salad over him. He still believes I behaved in an anti-social way and says he won't sit at the same table as me again..........totally deluded or what!

Answer 2

If she was a Senior lady then you have to understand that she isn't thinking the same way as you.
She sees what she does as normal...and it is quite normal to pick ones teeth at the table. It's not nice to use the same pick to clean your nails but it's only human to do it without thinking.
Don't be so hard on her...Next time tell her in a joky way that what she is doing doesn't look nice. She might take the hint.

Answer 3

You just flat out tell her..."You know Aunt Erma, I can understand your need to clean the food out of your teeth to feel comfortable. But I would really prefer not being made to watch you do this. And I am sure that there are a lot of other people in here that would tell you the same thing. Please, go to the bathroom while you do your dental hygiene?!"

At least you didn't have to put up with my father, who thought nothing of taking his dentures out at the dinner table and licking them clean before he put them back in!

Answer 4

Obviously, no one taught her manners. How rude.

Maybe she just was not thinking about what she was doing because her mind was bent on getting the food stuck between her teeth out. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt.

Answer 5

You went as far as you could. I'd be willing to bet she has ill-fitting dentures and particles of food were stuck. The most discreet thing to do would have been a trip to the ladies' room, to wash them under the running water.

Answer 6

Call me eccentric, but I would have accorded her an immense measure of social slack and focused instead on the content of the conversation the two of you might have enjoyed. I am sorry her behaviour offended you. My focus at 64 years old is upon content, not appearances. I would be so much more interested in whether or not she had any interesting thoughts floating around in her noggin than whether or not she managed to get that speck of spinach out between her rear molars during her laborious excavation which must have been murder to watch... I fully understand your feeling put off by her actions. Men, however, tend to be somewhat more focused on who the person is, and what the value is of her thoughts, feelings and beliefs.

Answer 7

NEVER EVER HAVE LUNCH WITH HER AGAIN!

How absolutely disgusting? How on earth did you have the good manners not to stand up and walk out? I am afraid that I would have done.

I really hope for your sake that she was not a good friend - that behaviour would be a deal breaker for me!

Ugggh!

Answer 8

Difficult one hide the picks next time you invite her

Answer 9

I hate that especially when they eat what they have picked out of their teeth, yes I know it is only food but it puts you off.

Answer 10

This must be a cultural thing, because abroad it is quite 'the norm' to do this at the table.