why are so many women still desperate to be married?

Question

I'm in my 20s and it seems like the majority of women are desperate to get married. I have 2 friends that are happily married, and literally 6 friends that are miserable. I'm not against marriage, but why in this day and age are a lot of women still pressuring themselves to get married as soon as they can? You have a better chance of getting divorced than staying married, studies show that majority of men and women are unfaithful at some point in the marriage, and there are a ton of unhappy people in marriages. Is it societal pressure, fear of being alone, what?

just wanted to add I don't want to rip on people who are happily married, because I know they are out there! But I'm cynical because that is what that facts show, that most marriages end in divorce, more marriages are unhappy than not. It's being realistic more than cynical I think.

Answer 1

I am not married yet and I have no intention of marrying anytime soon. I went to college, completed my degree, I work very hard and have few days off. Today and a few days ago I used my spare time while doing laundry to come in here and answer some questions.

I agree with you. Far too many desperate women!!! How can it be right to marry someone you know is probably cheating on you..or you know is going to continue to beat you up, or betray you in every way possible? Marriage is not to be used to torture women, men, or children. Marriage is supposed to be two people.. a man and a woman, joining together until death they do part, and not by murder of one spouse by the other! Marriage is for becoming one. Marriage is not for a man or woman to enter into pretending they can and will change. Changes of a person into a mature being should come about during or shortly after high school.

I have several girl friends who are so jealous of other girls getting married, they would even try to drag a man to the alter just to beat the other girl to it. I have one girlfriend who believes the only way for her to get married is for her to steal another womans husband and she is trying to do so right now I am sure. They meet on days when he lies to his wife- she thinks he is at work but then he goes to my friends apartment so he can have sex with her for an hour or so and then he leaves. She calls it love making but I heard him call it sex. She thinks he is the most wonderful man on earth. I think he is irresponsible and mean and when I see his wife and him in church I want to stop going to church. She thinks he loves her and will throw away four children, a loving wife, a great home, many relatives who love him and respect him as a good father and husband, just to marry her. I think he will use her for awhile, that he has probably done this many times, and that he will throw her away when he is finished. He pays for her rent and other things. I call it prostitution. She calls it love. If he does leave his wife she gets someone as awful as she is but everyone else is destroyed.

It is very sad and does not seem to end at all, as this board for questions proves.

Answer 2

Because some women thinks they can have more being married. Women do not like being lonely and needs a man for duties around the house they cannot do and best of all for protection. Especially to care for the children cause they listen better to the male over a woman. Then some wants to try marriage cause their friends are married and you call it keeping up with the flock. Last but least they do it to keep another woman from getting the man the love and hurry and marry cause if they take too long they will lose.

Answer 3

The problem usually lies on both parties. Two desperate meet, get married after knowing each other for a month or so. I don't mean to come off as a push over but I've seen it too many times. I'm happily married but I got to know my husband for three years years before we considered marriage. I think the pressure is far greater for woman because they feel they need a man. I advise every woman to get to know the guy at least a year before considering marriage. After a year, two people truly show they true self to each other. My brother had a horrible honeymoon because he saw the real person that he had married. They had only known each other a year at their own wedding. I think also age plays a huge part too. Too many young girls want to get married because they feel they're "in love" but in reality they've known "their lover" for like a month. Too many older women want to get married to because they feel they don't have as much time. As for the un-faithfulness in marriages, it disgusts me. I don't understand why a married person would do that after they had made a commitment to their partner. If you're single please enjoy it and have fun with dating. Don't rush into any thing. Guard your heart, if it doesnt feel right, dont do it.

Answer 4

This tradition has been ingrained over the centuries. women's role is to marry, have children and be care giver. Why in this day and age it is still an issue , I don't know , except I think the pressure is still in certain circles. I thought After women burned their bra's and bitched about wanting to be equal to men , some of this was no longer an issue,/ some Women want their cake and eat it to. They want to have careers , Independence and At the same time want to play the submissive role. I am a woman and I have found it impossible to have both. I didn't answer your question , I'm afraid I only confused the issue questioned. . Maybe women really are from MARS :)

Answer 5

Why,why,why, I don't know and I'm a female I don't fall into that category I'm single, and loving it. I have a bf, but were under no pressure 2 get married.U raised a good point 4 those that want 2 get married, it could be fear of being alone. I can't answer 4 them. I'm single and loving it.

Answer 6

I will tell you why: because the grass is always greener on the other side. You are logical and happy being who you are. Your 6 friends are miserable and will probably get married and make their husbands miserable too. They think they are unhappy because they aren't married. When they get maried they will think they are unhappy because they don't have kids. When they have kids, they will be unhappy because they're fat. There are plenty of women who are happy being single. There are happy women who are married. Your friends sound depressing, so maybe you need happier friends.

Answer 7

They don't know any better. I know exactly what you mean. There is a spanish saying that translates to "better alone than in bad company". For a lot of women, it's a desire to have kids, and it is easier to do with two incomes, even if the man is little help. Other people think they will be the lucky ones to beat the odds and be happy. I wish I had known better!

Answer 8

Maybe it's just the company you keep. I'm not afraid to be alone, I know quite a few who don't really care and won't die if they never marry, but, more often than not, they choose to risk it all with a partner, it's kind of like having a permanent partner in crime, someone who complements you. Just enough of a difference to keep things interesting.

You sound a little cynical, dear.

Answer 9

I disagree with you.My hubby,and i have known eachother since we were both 12.Were now 22,and we have been faithfully married for 3 years,and have a 3 yr old son.I think some women just want to have what "we" have.A happy marriage.But yea youre right when it comes to some ppl being in marriges,and being unhappy.Thats becuase they just married anyone.I didnt make that mistake.I married my best freind.WHOA!! that feels good:)

Answer 10

Though I am not "desperate" to get married (I have a good job and a good life), I would like to get married. I have a lot to offer and would love to have someone to offer it to, and I would like a companion in life (and no, not a dog a cat). It would also help in fulfilling my sexual needs. I'm not going to put up that "I can do it on my own, I don't need a man" front just to look strong, I'm not weak for having needs.