Is This Poem Any Good?

Question

bird.

when i see you
i flap me fetters
Sqwak! Sqwak!
stay away from my tree
Sqwak! Sqwak!
let me live free

Answer 1

Did you mean "fetters" here (bonds, chains, etc)? Or did you mean feathers to go with the rest of your bird image?

Answer 2

On a scale from 1-10 1=bad
5=average
10= great
I would say 6

Answer 3

Well...it's short, I'll give it that. you don't have any rhyme in your first couplet, but you do in your last...so why not switch the lines so that you have alternating lines that rhyme abcb...like this:

When I see you
stay away from me tree
sqwak! sqwak!
I flap me feathers
Let me live free

You don't need the sqwak! line twice...also, if you're going to say "me fetters" or "me feathers", why would you say "my" tree? So, you either say "me tree" and "me feathers" or it's "my tree" and "my feathers". I wouldn't try to be too cute with "feathers" unless you mean a double entendre with "fetters"...and if you do, be prepared to explain yourself...if not, just say "feathers" and if you recite it, you can pronounce it anyway that blows your feathers :) or fetters :)

keep writing

Answer 4

I am sorry to say but that is not the best poem i have heard! I make poems and little phrases myself and i enjoy them very much!

Answer 5

I guess you supposed to be a bird too. huh. how about human to human.
(When I see you, It makes me so angry, Stay away from my life, let me be.)

Were you thinking of someone when you wrote this?

Answer 6

I think it should be longer,but its good you should add more meaning to the poem about birds.

Answer 7

cool but too short

Answer 8

no.

what's a fetter?

Answer 9

No offense,but uh...............*cough,cough*
IT SUCKS!!!!!!

Well.......was it a joke???????