how do you feel about that poem?

Question

early in the morning
this warm sun
awakes me
i dont need so much sun
i want to stay
in the northside on window
in the country side of emotions
Later i want to escape in the arms of the night
Hey
i dont need that sun
to brake my thoughts in drops of running seconds
into strange reality

Answer 1

I feel that there is a lot of symbolism going on and it also makes you curious. It makes you ask "why don't you need sun?" It's one of those brilliantly written poems that has multiple meanings and not just one meaning is write depending on the interpreter. To me, it's just a beautiful poem written by someone with many thoughts. To someone else though, it could be something completely different. I do like it though.

Answer 2

The poem is tangential...but okay.
It's "awakens", not "awakes"
"I" not "i"
"on the north side" not "in the northside"
"break" not "brake"
and "drops of running seconds" is a mixed metaphor.
I'd also stick a line break between "thoughts" and "in drops"...or whatever word you choose to replace "drops"

keep writing

Answer 3

Beautifully done! Light, but dark at the same time. The way you mention the sun and how you don't need it. How you long for the night to come, while you sit by the window. A nice balance between warm and cool.

Answer 4

i thnk it's good one with soft words and hidden meanings !!

that's better becoz u make the reader imagine in many ways and have many meanings and everyone will undrstand it in a different way than the others....

Good Job..Amazing Poem

Answer 5

Nice, now I will steal you this Poem and earn a lot of money,lol I am kidding....

Answer 6

i love it it is good