You came over
And boasted tonight
About your wonderful life
But I saw the light
You have no life
That’s why you ruin mine
You don’t even know it
Because you’re blind
I’m moving on
Like I should have before
I won’t be here the next time
You come to the door
Thank you for showing me
Your true colors tonight
I’m as free as a bird
Who has just taken flight
2007-08-10 20:28:48 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
I think your poem has merit. I also think you can work at the meter a bit more, but as for content, wonderful. Keep writing! The only thing that will make you get better and better is if you keep writing. But all in all... I like it.
2007-08-10 20:33:49 · answer #1 · answered by freebird31wizard 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very nice poem .. it reflects that the poet has learnt a lesson . Sometime we experience and gain wisdom from pain. And has strength to move. Very good.
2007-08-11 03:35:31 · answer #2 · answered by true blessings 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ur poem is good n it state zat some1 has hurted u u hav to work a bit more on the tone
2007-08-11 03:38:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a wonderful poem, I would buy it if it was in a book. Good luck, I love your work!
2007-08-11 03:36:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That poem is pretty creative! Keep on writing.
Good Job!!
2007-08-11 11:27:07 · answer #5 · answered by hisbaby1492 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its alright, a bit more work,
and u shuld make it a song ,,
u make loads mor money from that
2007-08-11 03:34:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
aww..i guess that's pretty much everything you can tell someone how you feel when he or she left you behind..its really nice and deep..ü
2007-08-11 03:37:22 · answer #7 · answered by kimmie_kimz08 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
very very nice, you should consider joining my poem group
2007-08-11 03:32:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
why do soooooo many people want to be poets? Give up already!!!
2007-08-11 03:32:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋