My fiancee drives a truck for a living. He leaves early in the morning and is home every night. He loves his job and makes decent money. The problem is that I worry about him constantly when he is out on the truck. I try very hard not to call too often because I know that he is working but occasionally i break down and call to check on him. If he doesn't answer, I really start to worry.
The problem is that I know for a fact that he doesn't wear a seatbelt. Every morning before he leaves my last words are "I love you" and "be careful". If I forget to say it, I will call and tell him or text it to him. I don't want to be a paranoid crazy person, but this is a real fear for me. What can I do?
2007-08-10 20:12:50 · 6 answers · asked by Been here before 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I have mentioned to him casually that it would make me feel better if he would wear a seatbelt (at all times, not just when he's working) he generally gives me a response saying that he'll be fine.
2007-08-10 20:27:36 · update #1
It's normal. You love him. You want to protect him.
You've got to realize that you can't.
It's part of growing up to realize that we will never
be in complete control of our world.
You're feeling that, and not liking it. - Also normal.
It might help to know that the more massive the vehicle, the less the need for a seat belt.
(Small comfort, but all I can offer.)
2007-08-10 21:11:41 · answer #1 · answered by Irv S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds reasonable to worry esp if he is not wearing a seatbelt. thats just dumb(sorry) when he drives for a living. i would be exactly the same as you. i don't think you are paranoid at all. You could sit him down and talk to him about the seatbelt thing..try to make him understand how much it really worries you and how would he feel if that was you driving around without a belt on. Also you could buy him a defensive driving course as a gift. or heck even get one for both of you then tell him you dont want to do it alone. Perhaps you could arrange with him certain times during the day when you could call. say twice a day. and if he cant answer right then he could have a time limit to answer. cos he knows you would be ringing right,. i think thats reasonable and i am sure he would understand that you worry. worrying means you care. give him something to hang on his mirror to remind him of you and when you give it to him tell him that its too remind him how much you love him and value his life and how you wish he would wear his seatbelt.
2007-08-11 03:28:03 · answer #2 · answered by darkling 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think what needs to happen is for your fiance to get a clear message about how this makes you feel. Let him know that while he does know what he's doing when he drives, it really concerns you that he doesn't wear a seatbelt--which is insane because cops pull truckers over ALL the time and you can really get a hefty fine for not wearing one.
Stress to him that you really care and just want peace of mind. If your fiance respects your feelings, he will wear his seatbelt. Sometimes when we love someone we need to put aside our selfishness in any form and do what we need to to help our loved ones feel at ease. For example, I don't go to drunken parties anymore because my fiance is always concerned that I'll go down that path, even though I always tell myself I won't. BUT I respect my fiance's feelings and no longer go to them. It isn't a really big sacrifice either because there are other things worth doing.
Wearing a seatbelt is a small token to pay for a fiance, rather than having her worry all the time.
2007-08-11 03:22:46 · answer #3 · answered by Flowergardener 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well my husband works for a large international company. He is gone for a week at a time. He flys everyday almost. This is just as bad because his life is in someone elses hands. I used to worry myself sick about it, and watch TV for plane crashes. I was so paranoid that I'd loose him this way. After some time passed (and alot of prayers) I realized that I was being paraniod. I just keep myself busy to take my mind off of it, and keep telling myself he'll be ok. Its been about 5 years that he has had this job, and sometimes I still get paranoid, but it goes away quicker now.
2007-08-11 03:20:05 · answer #4 · answered by Jacob's Mommy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, if you haven't already tell him how you feel. tell him that you wish that he would wear a seatbelt because it would make you worry less during the day about him. Guys respond well to girl who are straight with them, so just tell him what's bugging you!
2007-08-11 03:25:27 · answer #5 · answered by vintagecrayon21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are normal. This is called LOVE.
2007-08-11 03:22:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋