Would you like to join me in THANKING ex President Bill Clinton?

Question

Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for
Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my
"Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica
Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick. Did I
leave anyone out?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really planned
to wait until they were older to discuss it with them, but now they know more
about it than I did as a senior in college.

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place
(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know
is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that certain
sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the other one
involved does NOT have sex.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation
and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag the Dog" could
be plausible after all.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look graceful,
Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy
look moral.

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th
Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying
about Democratic campaign fund raising.

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonments from the
Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so
far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our
foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully
disguised as necessary trips.

9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars--- I really didn't need
it in the first place,
and I can't think of a more well deserving group of recipients for my
hard-earned dollars than jet fuel for all of your globe-trotting. I
understand you, the family and your cronies have logged in more time aboard
Air Force One than any other administration.

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of
convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them
rejoin society.

11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that Laura
Bush didn't! like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming gifts
you've received from your "friends."

12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White House for
vandalizing and destroying government property on the way out. I also
appreciate removing all of that excess weight (China, silverware, linen,
towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.) out of
Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less tax
dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar
advance for her upcoming "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10 million
advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to let
Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus in Israel
in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As part of the Oslo
agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release
so-called "political prisoners".

However, the Israelis would not release any with blood on their hands. The
American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State,
Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed
Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into Tower
One of the World Trade Center. This was reported by many of the American TV
networks at the time that the terrorists were first identified.
It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why shouldn't Americans
know the real truth?

What a guy!!

SINCERELY,
A US Citizen


PS. Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for "inventing" the
Internet, without which I would not be able to post this wonderful factual
blog.

Answer 1

Bill Clinton's Presidency: $800,000.00

Bill Clinton Merchanise profit: > $15,000,000,000

Reading one of the funniest, yet true post's ever: Priceless!

Answer 2

While you are thanking Bill,& Al the global warming Pro? I would love to thank x-Pres. Carter for giving away the panima canal, exposing our secret listening post in Japan that could hear all the Soviet pilots as they talked to Moscow or any one else so they would know to and how to keep us from knowing what the Soviet Union was up to at all times. I mean, is it important that we know what a country dedicated to our distruction with 10,000 Nukes pointed at U.S.A. does't know that we knew what they were saying or doing? What is 10000 Nukes to be worried about?
A bridge falls, 5 people get killed and all the media can talk about is a bridge falling. Yet when we have 10000 Nukes pointed at us the Media see's fit to alow a President be ask no questions nore demands our protection. What kind of fiduciary thinking is that. My guess is Americans want to die as our presidents want to play some kind of Russian rulet with our lives and national securities. But boy oh boy, we sure love these game playing play boy bunnies. Boy bunnies.
He is half of America's hero. A farmer that should have stayed that way. Is it the job that makes Presidents wacko?
By the way, 10,000 Nukes would kill every one in America 6 times. Read my lips=Foolish faith in authority is the worst enemy of truth. An old guy stated this, his name was Einstien.
Our worst enemy is us. An old guy stated this-=me.
Could we please have a brain as President =none wacko.

Answer 3

Thumbs up! love the part about Al Gore!

Answer 4

I've said t before, I'll say it again. He isn't the president anymore. Please get over it.

Seems to me like you all should have focused your energy on holding on to congress, instead of stewing over these kind of lists.

Try putting your energy towards finding a good Republican to be president next (hopefully not like this current Republican). Or maybe try putting your energy towards making this Republican Presidency work out.

Answer 5

You forgot the most important one

15. Thank you for marrying Hilary. If you hadn't, she might try to get some other poor doomed fool to go through hell with her....er...i mean....marry her.

:)

Answer 6

You forgot to thank Bill for introducing us to Hillary, who will lead us all into the slavery of socialism if we let her.

Answer 7

A great letter but you left out thank him for the cover up cocerning Vince Foster's death, and the military personal killed in The Balkins!

Answer 8

This is a great bit of reflection!! As for anybody that says they enjoyed economic growth, here in the midwest me & my family dang near starved to death!! Great question, you get a star!!!

Answer 9

Very impressive. Thumbs up and a star. That was worth staying up for.

Answer 10

HA!!!! But I think someone else taught the children about the oral sex. How you say his name? The Star Jones, I think.