How should things be divided between a spouse and stepchild?

Question

Husband has a minor child from a previous marriage, he has retirement and life insurance through his work. ( This is a new job that he just started a few months ago, we have been married for a year). I just found out that he has named his daughter as beneficiary on all of his insurance policies and retirement. Although I understand that she needs to be provided for in case of his death, I am a little concerned that money for his funeral will not be alotted. We own a house which if something happens to him his interest will go to me and my interest should go to him if something happens to me. I feel guilty for concerning myself with this, but I feel that I should be beneficiary on something so I will have the money to bury him. IS THIS WRONG? Should I be concerned?

Answer 1

tell him your concerns and be as clear about it as you were here. then ask if you guys can see a lawyer and make a will to make sure everyone is taken care of. if you are specific and not asking for all of it then I am sure he will see the reason here.

Answer 2

First, in some states he cannot do this without your written consent -- this is to protect you in that situation.

Second, you can take out additional life insurance with you as the beneficiary. If his child is a minor, but he dies the day she reaches age of majority and she decides to cut you out, you don't get anything. You only need a small amount to cover funeral expenses, assuming things are all paid for (such as your house, etc.)

I would simply ask if he minds if the two of you take out insurance policies on each other for a minimal amount, with only each other as beneficiaries -- and list the reasons you listed above. If he won't, then I would be concerned.

Answer 3

This is an easy one, My wife and I bought insurance policies on line for $500,000.00 each and we are each others beneficiaries it cost about 25.00 to 30.00 each month and it will end when the kids turn 20 but it is so if one of us passes away the other can pay the bills and collage money for our children. I have two step daughters and I have a son from previous marriage, we also have one together. You can get these plans for very little money. We went through select quote to get the best rates, they will also send a nurse to your home to do blood work. Check it out and good luck.

Answer 4

Should? Well, people can do what they want but I suppose you are asking morally and legally what is common. If a person has no will and hasn't put a percentage amount in writing there are laws, each state varies, so find out in the ordinances on your state gov's website what is COMMON to see what SHOULD / or normally does happen.

In my opinion (I know you didn't ask for one, you just want answers) that is very fearful and selfish of him. I hope if you sincerely talk to him he will change things. Otherwise you must just accept what his wishes are ... but he won't be checking out anytime soon most likely so try to not focus on it. Don't feel guilty about thinking of it either! Can you help it? NO! When things are heavy on our minds they are supposed to be then COMMUNICATED, or else your mind wouldn't be telling you over and over about it. Be true. Talk to him. Just ask him WHY. Suggest that he treat you in death as he would want you to be treated in life and the total neglect he's written so far says something about his love for you.

Peace.

(my hubby's giving his mom 50% if he should ever die before her...)

Answer 5

Yes, it is, and you should be concerned. You are his wife, his primary financial responsibility. The laws vary from state to state, but in my state, if there is no will, everything is left to the surviving spouse. There is a reason for this logic. Like you said, you have started a life together and have accumulated bills together, etc.

I would talk to him and express your concerns. He should leave you provided for, and then can set aside something for his daughter, maybe enough for her college and to finish raising her, etc. You should definitely get this ironed out! You can also take out your own life insurance policy on him and be the benificiary yourself. He may have to undergo a medical examination, but if you express your concerns, I see no reason for him to be uncooperative.

Answer 6

there will be a social security benefit for burial?
you need to ask him what money to use to bury him.
have a heart-to-heart about this. maybe he will do a prepaid funeral and put this item to bed. maybe he didn't think about it. don't get too upset. or you could consider just not paying for teh funeral and let the daughter pay since she will get the $$. key is talk to hubby about it without being accusing.

Answer 7

You should be talking to your husband about this .
You can do pre paid funerals over here in Australia may be that is an options for both of you too .

Answer 8

he should definately leave the house to you atleast until your death then she gets it. And ONE insurance policy or allocate money to be spent on funeral expenses and debts at the very least.

Bring it up with him.

Answer 9

You should be concerned that you have a dream of burying your husband. You know, I am with my wife for 20 years and I never have thought of where I'd get the money to bury her. You need to seek a professional help and bury your dark dreams before you kill your husband.

Answer 10

you need to sit down and communicate your feelings with your husband or you won't have to worry about paying for his funeral... you will be getting DIVORCED first. no communication= divorce..And yes you do have a right to be concerned but he may have an explantion so go talk to him NOW!!!!!!!!!!