to the ladies out there does a guy asking u to marry them change everything?

Question

will it make all the problems go away?

she says when i ask her to marry me all the mood swings will change and that she will be super happy.

Answer 1

And you actually fall for that?

Answer 2

Marriage is a wonderful thing but, it does not change who a person is before the marriage. Yes, you will hopefully grow up together in the relationship but that is not always the case. Lots of things need to be said before the big day is set... no more secrets...if you go into a relationship resenting something about that person it will only be intensified when you can't get away from that person (when divorce is not a option). I admit some people want to get the cow and milk for free and that can make a woman who has been waiting "moody" to say the least. However, if you love each other little things should not be a major concern. Right? Or is it that one of you is not ready and just trying to let the other know like a hint that the other just doesn't not get. Time is too precious to live a life for the happiness of another person that is not willing to do that for you.

Answer 3

No, it does not make ANY of the problems go away, but creates new ones, if you asked for her hand for the wrong reasons (manipulation, to keep from loosing her, to get her off your back and stop with all the hints, already!).

But if you truly love her, and want to spend the rest of your life with her, and she feels the same about you, that will be why all of the problems will get worked out; because of all the magical "C" words that come up for a marriage that was meant to be:
Commitment
Compromise
Compatibility
Closeness
Caring
Chemistry
Completeness
Complements
Cherish &
Chivalry.

If these words do not really apply in your relationship, it is doomed, and your proposal will just tell her she has now "won", and she can relax, let heself go, and stop trying so hard--because the real work for her will come after the ceremony, when she trys to rid you of all those traits she finds distastefull, and add some she feels her husband should have, and you don't [yet]. In other words, if there is a problem on either of your ends, there could very well be an agenda to get the other person locked in, then fix all that is wrong after the ceremony. This never works.

Good luck, and lol.

Answer 4

Nothing will change. There will always be something she wants from you and she will do anything to get it. Right now she probably has friends that are getting married and she wants to be doing the same thing her friends are doing. Marriage is a wonderful thing..it shouldn't be a answer to mood swings. She sounds like an emotional roller coaster. She needs to grow up a bit. Unless you have been stringing her along for 5 years..then I can understand why she would want you to propose to her. BUT she should be happy enough to just love you. I would not give in to her and ask her to marry you for such a silly reason. You will be the one to regret it!

Answer 5

1st. think you may have put this question in wrong section.
2nd. she may be happy for about 2 seconds. but then the stress of the wedding planing starts and after that it's the stress of being married and everyday life, then the kids come... not to scare you, but if you if she is Moody now just think how she will be when real life hits her. Being engaged is a wonderful time in a young couples life, but it is certainly not easy and doesn't make all the problems go away. It actually creates them. It can be really wonderful to tackle those issues together, but really hard if only one is going to do it and the other is going to have a mood swing. lol I know I have been in a relationship like that. Hope this helps. Hugs and best of Luck, Kuka

Answer 6

Um, yes, getting married changes everything. Even just knowing you'd like to get married changes everything. Depending on how your girl feels, it can be either a good change or a bad change.

But getting married is a big responsiblity, that doesn't solve any problems. I'd think it might create new problems more than it would solve old problems. Sure, there are advantages, lower insurance rates, etc...but it's a commitment that I feel is taken far too lightly sometimes in this country. The responsibility lies within the union itself, and it's supposed to be lifelong, enduring, and true. Not thrown together in order to solve some problem that would be better off being solved the right way, whatever that is, rather than just covering it up with a brides veil.

Marry for love, and for no other reason.

Answer 7

:) alas no, we are who we are. Some things do change because expectations change. You know, how we expect a husband to act, or how you expect a wife to act, is usually slightly different. ok. for some, a lot different, but.... mood swings, unless they are based on her disappointment about not haviing been asked yet, are part of who she is. Maybe it's depression & she needs a little help, which most of us resist (but need from time to time) or maybe it is a medical problem and she should have it checked out. Better to go though one of her girl friends on that one though, cause coming from a guy (bluntly) , will just swing her mood again to mad! LOL. Hey, I can say that being a lady! LOLOL..... Getting married, just like having babies, does NOT fix problems. Just side tracks you for awhile, but the problem will surface again, not just magically disappear. If you love her enough in spite of her problems, ( and we all have problems including you), hopefully you can talk openly and honestly (and gently) about facing them together and finding a solution. Sometimes it means deciding if you can live with her shortcomings, just as she must decide to love you inspite of yours. :) Getting some insite from her friends would be a good way to get a clear picture and history, if they know.feel you are asking from concern, and not about judging. Best of luck!

Answer 8

I agree with the Hell No answer! Sounds like straight manipulation to me. You ask a woman to marry you when its the next level in the relationship. Its a stage that comes next and not a quick fix for any problems. I feel that relationships are always going to have problems, they never go away just because you make your union legal. I feel that the only reason that a couple should marry is when they are ready to start a family. Couples HAVE to be a great team to tackle those problems together as a married couple, otherwise you will have a problem on top of a problem. No problems go away, when married you just have different problems.. if she says that her mood swings will go away and she will act different, she obviously has alot of issues of her own to deal with that she needs to own, and not put them on to you....and, if you are the reason for her mood swings, then you have issues that you need to own that you are pushing off on to her, to make her be and feel like that. Sounds to me, you both have a lot of personal issues to deal with individually, and marriage is not the type of bandaid that you need. try a therapist or soulsearching...not a marriage union.

Answer 9

Marriage will not solve your problems. If anything, it will exacerbate them. Marriage is tough enough under good conditions..let alone trying to make someone else happy and whole. If she is having serious mood swings, I would have her checked for chemical imbalance or bi-polar. But under NO circumstances would I marry in order to "fix" a problem. A couple should be on solid ground before making that commitment. Does this scenario sound familiar..."well, If I just get pregnant and we have a baby, that will fix our problems." Sound like something you have heard before..of course...does it ever work?..of course not!! You cant fix a problem by adding more problems.

PS. If you do get married....make sure I am the first one you email when you split...so I can say I told you so...

Answer 10

Yes and No. Yes because for some women this is a symbol of commitment and some women can't and won't tolerate thier man being friends with, talking to or about other women. This same type of woman is very possessive and will become aggressive as time passes...(this is a huge generalization). No because all it means is that you are ready for the next step and you want to make sure that the woman you love is a part of your life forever.

Asking a woman to marry you should never be used as a way to make problems better because 9 out of 10 time it amplifies every problem you have. Problems that exists prior to marriage only become more prominet after marriage.
Hope you Make a good Decision
Momma_Bear

Answer 11

I am sorry to burst your bubbles that marriage won't change a person, if there is a baggage you will help to carry too.Persons who suffers of mood swing have imbalance of mind. I know you will live ,dealing with that kind of person,will you be happy and have a tranquil life? This question was post in Cars and Transportation',well ,if you buy a defective Mercedes-Benz it will give you a problem even how hard you try to fix the problem by taking it to the mechanic,there is always something wrong with the car.