wouldn't talk to me so much and come visit me because he works offshore. I know because he gave me his password to check his stocks which is the same as his e-maill password. I checked his e-mail. I know that is wrong, but I found out he had been sending love letters and getting love letters from other girls. He doesn't know I did this. I love him and I'm so hurt because we have been together so long. We got in an argument and I accused him of cheating but I didn't tell him I read his mail. He denied it and said I'll never find a "good man" like him again and that he doen't need me. I love him so much it hurts. Should I leave him and hope I meet someone better someday. I'm only 23 but I feel like I'll never meet a good man.
2007-08-10 07:00:29 · 24 answers · asked by hanna 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
It will be tough, but you need to find someone you trust. Unfortunately, he's learned that he can manipulate you and you believe him when he does (i.e. claiming you'll never find a "good" man like him... Hopefully you'll find a better one who doesn't cheat). It's going to hurt, but better sooner then after you've invested even more emotionally into this. There are plenty of good men out there, and odds are you'll meet one though it may take time. Take care....
2007-08-10 07:05:43 · answer #1 · answered by Rossonero NorCal SFECU 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Girl you are so young to feel like you will never find a good man. You need to build your self esteem up and realize you deserve alot better than that. Cheating is cheating, and with all the dieseases out there, who can afford to take those chances with some guy who says he love you, but writing love letters to other women. Do you really feel like you deserve to stay in a relationship with a man who is not committed to you. And how would you define a good man. A good man is someone you can't trust??? Come on now sweetheart and get yourself together. I hope you realize you deserve more than that. It is not going to get better. Cut your losses now and let him go. You already have the proof right in front of your face. How much more evidence do you need. Oh ya and by the way, love is not suppose to hurt.
2007-08-10 07:44:07 · answer #2 · answered by ?? yaddajean ?? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Life is short - walk away. Hard as that is - you know what to do, but you're afraid of being alone. That's like saying "I don't know when I'll find a steak again, so I better sit here and enjoy this canned cat food that's making me a little nauseous."
Maybe you're terribly homely, overweight, or have other physical or mental problems that cause you to believe that no one will be attracted to you; or perhaps you are duplicating some family relationship was abusive - because it feels oddly "comfortable." Even if this is all true - that's no reason to put up with a dishonest man (or a dishonest ANYONE in your life).
Sadly - women usually date men, and men - the best men - tend to be pretty average morally. All my best friend girls are better than my best friend guys. And every guy under 30 tends to act like an X-Box-playing 17 year old. Hopefully - you'll find more mature guys as you grow older.
You can easily find "good men" like this guy - lots of guys cheat, why be with this particular one?
Be smart and tough it out - get moving.
2007-08-10 07:15:42 · answer #3 · answered by rstrother 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Many people will try to tell you what to do (probably because you asked them to *smile*) and say all types of demeaning things about you and him. If you feel he's a good man, then he is (your perception is the only one that matters or makes a difference in your life). But are you a good woman, do you feel you deserve better? He's lied to you (and yes, we all will lie at some time in our life), and he's cheating (because no matter if he's sleeping with them or not...he's not playing fair), and he's trying to keep you with him by using intimidation tactics. Do you feel that you deserve that...probably not. Why not leave and take care of you Cutie? Stop worrying so much about what others think of you or how they view you. Remember, YOUR perception is the only one that matters in this world. See yourself how you want to be seen. I've been in your shoes (and actually I'm still kinda in your shoes), but you're young and still have limitless opportunities before you. Take the OPPORTUNITY!
PEACE and Blessings
2007-08-10 07:18:34 · answer #4 · answered by honeygirlc 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
you said "I love him so much it hurts" but that obviously means he doesn't love you back, even if he is saying he does. The reason why it hurts you so much is becuase you are trying to make up for the love he is not giving to you, by showering him with yours, and hunny if you're giving him all of that even when you KNOW what he is doing, you do not deserve him.. you deserve someone who is going to embrace your love and be afraid to loose it, not someone who couldn't care less if you were there or not. Get rid of him right now because you've obviously been hurting for too long and a cheater is NEVER worth it, just remember.. once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater, tell him he needs to **** or get off the pot, and good luck.. stay strong
2007-08-10 07:44:06 · answer #5 · answered by vmus_buhler 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is Not a "good man". You should get away fast.
If you did as all use to do and stayed a virgin until you were married; then you may have found one that loves all you of you and not just sex. That dose not love to lie. There are never guaranties. I was 29 when I found my man and as soon as we were married he turned into another type of person. Everything before had been an act. Be careful, very careful.
2007-08-10 07:48:40 · answer #6 · answered by geessewereabove 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is a cheat and a liar. You know this. You should leave him. Just because he said you will never find another good man doesn't make it so. Besides, he isn't a good man. He said he didn't need you. If he loved you, he would never say such things. You deserve better. You owe it to yourself to be happy, to be loved, and to be treated with respect. Obviously, he is not doing these things for you. Leave him, find yourself, and move on. You will be better for it.
2007-08-10 07:41:01 · answer #7 · answered by magix151 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Youre worried if you leave him you wont find a good man? You havent found a good man in him if hes lying to you and cheating on you.. that ones up to you.. do you want a man thats sleeps with other women.. and tells other women the same things he tells you? Or do you want a man that is yours and only loves you!! The man youre with doesnt love you if hes cheating on you and lying to you.. so you need to decide if thats good enough for you..
2007-08-10 07:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
he is stringing you along what if he gets an std or aids or hiv where is the love then? you must love yourself so you can love someone else and that dude doesnt love you at the end of the day will his stock cure the std he will give you no, would money make you feel better when you know you have aids, you are 23 you have a long life ahead of you leave the cheating bastard and dont sell yourself short you deserve better than that
2007-08-10 07:05:44 · answer #9 · answered by theredapple 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
quit lying to yourself! he is not a good man he is a lying cheating selfish loser and he thinks he can keep doing this because you are stupid enough to think he is a good man.what is he good for? if he loved you he would not be doing these things--- girl get some self respect and tell him its over and never talk to him again unless the test come back positive for the stds he may have given you.get checked out and make sure he did not give you any diseases and HIV or aids.good luck.
2007-08-10 07:49:46 · answer #10 · answered by dixie58 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋