how can i get my wife to want sex more?

Question

she haS LOST HER SEX DRIVE

Answer 1

make her feel beautiful, desired, romanced,and change the environemt. let her dress up and take her out. without kids or having to be cleaning at home.

Answer 2

1) TALK TO HER ABOUT IT!!
Listen to what she says, there might be a good reason why she's lost her drive. Stress is often a huge factor in libido, is she stressed about work or the kids? Does she have so much to do during the day that she's exhausted by bedtime? If so, do whatever it takes to take some of the stress off of her. Help out more when possible, or even just be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on.

2) Be accepting and don't pressure her. The more you pressure her when she won't want to, and the more she'll feel like she just has to do it to get you off her back. It becomes an obligation not a pleasurable experience.This doesn't mean you should give up trying, just don't use guilt or pressure to get what you want.

3) Talk to the doctor. Depending on her age and reproductive status she might be having hormonal issues that are affecting her libido. Another problem that a lot of women have is that hormonal birth control methods (pill, patch, shot, ring, hormone-IUD) can mess with your sex drive. She might want to try a non-hormonal method ( the non-hormonal IUD is awesome for anyone with hormone or mood issues and is very effective)

4) MAKE IT ENJOYABLE FOR HER!!!
Ask her what SHE likes sexually. Spend an evening focusing on her needs and wants, and if yours get met along the way, great! If you really care about her you'll take the time and make sure that she's feeling pleasure too, simply out of the goodness of your heart. I don't know what you all are into, but...ahem...make sure she's being stimulated in all the right places (nipples, rear-end, clitoris etc.) Hint: girls like recieving oral sex too. You might know that already, but a lot of guys need to be told that. Read some books on the subject (how-to books, not porn).

4) Go see a counselor. Having a third party who you both can speak openly to will help not only the sexual issues, but might make you aware of other relationship issues that are manifesting themselves as sexual issues. Some people refuse to go to counseling for whatever reason, but if you really love your wife and want the relationship to work then you need to find out why you're having problems and solve them before it destroys your marriage. Either the lack of sex will lead to relationship problems (infidelity, loss of intimacy etc.) or the relationship problems (pressure, arguments etc.) are leading to sexual problems. A counselor can help you figure it out. If you really want your relationship to work, check your ego at the door and do whatever it takes to get back on track.

Good luck and happy humping.

Answer 3

Your not going to like my answer!
You probably are not giving her enough emotional love. She doesn't feel appreciated, loved, romanced. Do you do things for her with out being asked? Some women don't see sex as how to connect with their man, men see it that way. Women want to feel the way they did when your were dating, desired, wanted.. I bet you used to call just to say hi, not whats for dinner? You used to bring a card, or flowers or take her out (dinner, movies, or just for a car ride). I'm not saying you have to buy her but revert to those days when she felt you wanted her. She knows you want sex so don't keep telling her she doesn't give it up enough because then she'll feel like she is not satisfying you as a wife (not just in bed)
Is she self conscious about her body? Do you exersize together? Does she have a million things to do for the next day at bed time while you shower and just plop into bed? Our minds are thinking of our "to do list" men are thinking I need to let "some go" so I can get up and do the to do list.
THis is very normal in all marriages at some time. It changes I promise! As long as you handle it right. If you threaten, if you cheat,if you give the impression that you can get it elsewhere, when she comes around it will be with someone else. But if you make her feel good, about herself, appreciate her for what she does, and try to take her away for a night or two.. Eventually she will regain that spark you had before.

Answer 4

Just tell her " I need more sex!" and maybe see if she'll go see a doctor to help with this issue, sometime prescription drugs affect the sex drive. But till then, at night, maybe set the mood with massage oils, candles, flowers, take a bath together if you can. Set the mood for romance and sex. Lots of foreplay and kissing, you can't expect her to just hop on and be in the mood, make that mood come so to speak.

Answer 5

Wives sometimes get burned out, early in the marriage. They begin to feel like sex objects and lovemaking becomes a chore. If you want to entice your wife, you've got to make her believe the sex is about her, and not about your physical urge. One thing that makes a woman feel wanted is when her man talks about the way he felt when he first saw her. When you tell your woman something like: "When I first saw you, I didn't know what to say. You had those beautiful eyes and that gorgeous smile--I didn't think I had a chance with a girl like you." Get it? If you do this right, you will have your wife eager to be in your arms. Don't do it when you're in bed together, but pick a time when she least expects it. While you're out shopping, or somewhere like that. Seriously. If you do this right, you won't have to coax her into bed. She'll want to give herself to you. You'll see her fixing herself up at night and moving closer to you. Don't rush it. Just watch and learn. Trust me on this.

Answer 6

You can't.

Don't let anyone deceive you with the "be more romantic - buy her a dildo - get her some flowers - give her a foot rub - write her notes" bullsh*t. It doesn't work.

But look over my answers to this same question from another poster yesterday - there are some good links to articles on WebMD about women with low post-marriage sex drives.

You'll find them short but informative reading.

Answer 7

Shes probably bored. Try something new. Men seem to think that just cause they are satisfied so are the woman. And if we don't get satisfied it becomes like a chore, sometimes I would rather be doing dishes.

Answer 8

#1 Lessen the amount of spending money she has access to
#2 Start a hobby that takes up your time

She will become bored quickly and then want to talk to you about it, but then have to use sex to get your attention.

Answer 9

You have lost your attraction to her.Don't turn her on?Maybe you have not helped her enough? Are a slob.Rag on her, . Have to romance her not use her. If this doesn't work either except or leave your call??

Answer 10

The way to a woman's pants is through her brain.