Ok my husband and I have been separated for going on 9 months. We have a 15 month old daughter together. He'd been living with his new girlfriend since March but he recently dumped her. He called me Wednesday and as soon as I answered he said "will you marry me?" I know he was kidding but then he asked me and my daughter to go to dinner with him. I told him I'm not taking him back if that's what he's getting at (I'm trying to play hard-to-get b/c I've been here before and if I run back to him easily he changes his mind) Then he called me Thursday night and I told him I was thinking about calling off the divorce so I could get a new lawyer and as soon as I said that he was like "I don't wanna be married to you anymore... let's just get it over with" Do you think his attitude changed cause I hurt his pride the day before by saying I didn't want him back? I'm not sure if he wants me to "marry him again" or go thru with the divorce.
2007-08-10 03:38:20 · 21 answers · asked by newmom06 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm thinking the only reason he would even consider getting back with you is because it didn't work out with the other woman.
Do you really want to be second best?
I wouldn't.
As soon as someone else comes along, you'll probably be on the out with him again.
You need to continue on with the divorce, and find someone that will put you first in their life.
It doesn't matter how much you love him, if you're not getting it in return, what good is it?
You really do need to move on.
Don't "settle" for less, or "less" is what you'll get.
2007-08-10 05:36:50 · answer #1 · answered by MommaBear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You told him you didn't want to get together what else is he suppose to think.
Besides this dude had a girl friend while married to you? Please don't go back to him or let him come back to you. Go get a divorce and find a new guy that will take care of you. This guy isn't worth that kind of trouble. This will make him become so jealous because he knows he can't have you anymore.
After that go sign up for child support which will really get him thinking about doing this to another girl. Do it as soon as possible though because they do not back pay. So waiting until your child is 10 means you only have 8 years of child support.
Also if this makes you feel better about the divorce.. A Christian is allowed to divorce for unfaithfulness in marriage.
2007-08-10 10:48:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot live your life in this nightmare-like roller-coaster. He is either playing games, he may be schizophrenic, or the most immature, unstable partner on the planet.
Both your daughter and yourself deserve better than that and his behaviour will just get worse, (Although I can't see how it can be worse then this. He obviously can't even keep his girlfriend).
You do yourself the biggest favour of your life, and get the nastiest divorce lawyer you can find, so you can get some child support. Then make sure you do everything you can to make your life better, and this includes getting your soon to be ex husband out of your life, going back to school, getting financially independent and finding a partner who does not think that playing retarded kindergarten games at this age is acceptable behaviour.
2007-08-10 10:50:55 · answer #3 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think both of you are way too immature to be married at all if you're constantly playing games. I suggest you divorce and then not get involved until you are old enough to take on the responsiblity of you holding up your end of a committed relationship without resorting to playing childish games. The one I feel sorry for most is your daughter....a child being raised by a child doesn't have much of a chance.
2007-08-10 10:52:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Good question. He will have to answer it. Even if you did hurt his feelings I think he would not have said he still wants a divorce. Sounds like you both need to get away from each other and see what happens.
2007-08-10 10:42:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy is playing games, and he keeps doing it because he knows he can get away with it! Get the divorce over with and MOVE on!
2007-08-10 10:46:25 · answer #6 · answered by greeneyes_bjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is very imature and you can't go forward with an imature man. If you love him, you could wait, even being separated. Personally, if I were you, I would not be the one filing, if he wants it HE should pay the $$ to have it done. You're making it too easy for him to flip flop and manipulate you.
2007-08-10 10:43:57 · answer #7 · answered by Melodya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like... game playing or manipulation. Trust your instincts on this one. And you should be able to change attorneys without stopping the divorce. Talk to a new one and he can advise.
2007-08-10 10:41:19 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
who cares what he wants?! What do YOU want. what is best for YOu and your daughter? he's playing around and you need to make a decision for him but mainly for you. once divorce is brought up it means someone has given up. have you two been to counseling? it sounds like he just wants someone around. that doesn't mean that he still loves you or that he wants to make it work. it just mean that he can't function without a woman around. tell him to hire a maid and get out of your life.
2007-08-10 10:47:44 · answer #9 · answered by Victoria J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have u guys tried to seek help it sounds like the relationship is a on and off again . stay away 4 one year and get help together if there is any bouts? but don't sleep with him that gives mixed signals
2007-08-10 10:46:08 · answer #10 · answered by Frank d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋