What kinds of things do you sacrifice when you get married?

Question

Friends? Freedom? What kinds of things have you experienced/ witnessed? Serious answers and explanations, please. Thanks :-)

Answer 1

This isn't just about marriage. It's about any long-term committed relationship.

You sacrifice variety and laziness. You also sacrifice loneliness.

When you are in a long-term committed relationship, you need to work on it every day. You can't take a week off. You can't get lazy.

You will also spend somewhat less time with you family and friends. But, don't ignore them. While it's true you need to begin to build the most important relationship in you life, keep in touch with your friends and family as they'll have good advice for you along the way.

Answer 2

You can't do exactly what you want to do, when you want to. That is not necessarily a bad thing, though. You should be doing what is best for the marriage, you no longer have only yourself to consider. For example, you want a new designer bag for $500 which you would buy when you were single, but if you're married you have to think twice... like what does your husband get, is that the best use of the money (say you have 2 car loans), etc. So that's an example of the compromise/sacrifice. Of course most people end up financially better off being married, like you can afford to buy a house with 2 incomes, but there are trade-offs on the small things. Partying all night, leaving the house a mess, etc. don't really fly.

Answer 3

I don't think you need to sacrifice anything unless you are in dept. Marriage is being a team and fixing the problems that occur. You can still have your friends, but most importantly, you need to make more time with your spouse rather than with your friends. Your priority is with your spouse and family. If you have good morals, G-d is first, spouse, then family.

Remember, don't ever escape your problems with a divorce. Always, take your marriage vows seriously and work your problems together. You are in it together. You both should be in agreement when it comes to decision making.

Consider reading these books before getting married "10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives", "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" and "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage."

Answer 4

I suppose the greatest sacrifice is the focus of your life. I make sacrifices all the time but my wife tells me the biggest was one I was prepared to make a few years ago. My wife is also my dominant and i am her submissive. Several years ago my wife asked me to if as a sign of my devotion to her I would be willing to cut off my ring finger. We had been drinking a bit and my wife told me that it would make her happy if I would remove the ring finger of my left hand where I wear my wedding band. She said that wedding bands did not mean anything to anyone anymore but if I had no finger at all it would be a huge visual sign of my marriage and devotion to her. It seemed to me that this was powerfull to her after a while of talking I decided I could do it. The problem was how as she wanted me to do this myself and I knew I could not use a kitchen knife or anything like that. It needed to be quick and over or else I could not go through with it. I had a handheld small electric saw that I thought would do it quick but the other thing was trying to use one hand to cut into a finger on the other was hard to get the right angle after trying. Eventually I came up with the idea of putting my left hand sort of loosely but tight in a vice and this would give me free room and clearance to cut my finger without moving my hand too much. I was ready to do it but when I went to start my wife stopped me and asked me if I was crazy to do that. I think at the beginning when we were just talking about it she wanted me to do it but seeing it scared her and she wanted to stop because we had talked about it for over an hour prior to thinking how to do it. She told me I was very devoted to be willing to do that but she didn't want me to.

Answer 5

You won't notice anything during the honeymoon stage. The hard part begins after the infatuation and the sex ceases to cloud our judgment.

If you were very accustomed to your "alone time" for example, that goes away along with much of the spontaneity you enjoyed as a single person. (specially if you add kids to the equation) Everything is now planned and accounted for, and most spending must be by mutual decision.

Then there's the point when you realise you have very different sex drives. That (many) men and women see sex differently (love versus bodily function) And the dissatisfied partner realises they aretrapped in a legally binding exclusivity contract.

Answer 6

You sacrifice everything you once was you become a whole different person over time. You find yourself saying things that before you never in a million years would say.The biggest thing you give up is selfishness you now think of your family where as before everything was me me me now it's us us us.

Answer 7

If you marry the right person, you don't sacrifice your friends and freedom. You gain a whole lot more.

Answer 8

Your sacrificing your right to think of only yourself.......that's all......you now have an obligation to someone other than yourself.......you can still have fun and freedom, and variety, but it will come to you in different ways......and of course it depends on who you are married to....the guy/girl can be your true soulmate or...a horrible, controlling, jealous person.....just pick your partner wisely and make sure you are both on the same page BEFORE you decide to marry

Answer 9

My whole paycheck, but I was never lonely, although sometimes I longed for loneliness.
Space- every inch of the house was taken up by things that weren't mine, and my things usually disappeared.
Friends- I always had, I just never spent time with them. For some reason, my wfe was never happy it seemed, but when she was - that made it all worth while.

Answer 10

one of the things i had to give up was a good friend of mine.
he was a guy that i went to highshool with but we dont talk often.... we probably talk once or twice a yr but its always as if it was yeterday that we spoke.... we were really close.
anyway, before i got married, my hubby to be got a call from and "old" female "friend".
i got peed off cos i didnt believe that they were JUST friends... if they were just friends, why is she calling him when she knows he is engaged and if she doesnt know, why doesnt she know???
anyway, he explained to her that he is getting married soon etc and the call ended.
i didnt say much after that but secretly prayed my guy friend would call... and the next night, he did!!!!
anyway, my hubby got jealous (which is what i wanted) and we had a little arguement about it.
we came to the conclusion that we wouldnt talk to friends onthe phone of the opposite sex out of respect for each other.
it killed me to call my friend and tell him not to call again but i would choose my hubby over anyone in an instant.
i know its stupid to be jealous but its hard not to be!!!
i do trust my man 100% but everyone has insecurities so thats why i agreed.