2007-08-09 14:58:57 · 20 answers · asked by spreading wings 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, unlike everyone else, I wouldn’t necessarily categorize it as controlling.
What exactly is he threatening you with? If he’s telling you that if you leave, he won’t give you money to pay your bills…well, he doesn’t have to (unless a court orders alimony) and why would he? If he’s telling you that if you leave, he’ll close out the joint credit cards…well, he can do that, and he’d be an idiot not to.
If he’s telling you that you won’t get anything in the divorce settlement, then he’s just blowing smoke up your rear. He doesn’t decide that. The court decides it. Generally speaking, martial assets and debts are split 50/50.
2007-08-09 15:44:43 · answer #1 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You can get a job of your own and also receive child support if you have kids and possibly alimony, as well.
So, you will not be destitute if you leave this man and he is just telling you this so that you will be too afraid to leave him. It is definately controlling behavior.
2007-08-09 22:05:22 · answer #2 · answered by Melanie J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say hateful not controlling because the court will see to the money split...but I would say he is a 1st class JERK!!! I certainly see why you would want to leave a situation like you must be living in...
It is a sad state for him to think that money is the only thing that keeps you with him since that is what he chooses to threaten you with.....
Good luck
2007-08-09 22:51:24 · answer #3 · answered by missyj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he wants u to think that if u leave u will fail, and u can't do it without him, don't allow it. My x-husband did the same thing and u know what..........I walked out with 2 kids and no job, but I made it and it was the best move I ever did, and I am just fine, and I showed him that I can do it on my own.
2007-08-09 22:07:30 · answer #4 · answered by Amber 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! He is definitely not showing love or concern for someone he wants to remain with! Nobody in this day and age should stay married to somebody for the wrong reasons! I think he just added one to your list of reasons to leave.
2007-08-09 22:05:39 · answer #5 · answered by oogabooga37 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes..that is a form of controlling you. do you have a job? if not get one, the next time he threaten you in this manner. at lease you have the mean to leave and support yourself. good luck
2007-08-09 22:15:36 · answer #6 · answered by Thomas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds upset you want to leave him & unless you say whats up i cant really answer your question
i dont like split ups just because the grass is greener unless he is cheating or any deal breakers you should work it out
2007-08-09 22:20:07 · answer #7 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course he is!
Money is power...and the one who has or controls the money has power over the other person. People who do this have serious issues and many times they are manipulative.
2007-08-09 22:02:41 · answer #8 · answered by Nena S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The nicest thing I could say is maybe he's scared..
But that is not only controlling.. it's cruel and hateful.
also.. immature.. if you don't play MY way, I'm taking my ball and going home.
A mature loving man would be concerned about your feelings and your welfare even if he doesn't get his way.
2007-08-09 22:08:45 · answer #9 · answered by Bentley 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shou;d never rely on any one for financial reasons, get a job leave him and show him you dont need him
2007-08-11 20:23:12 · answer #10 · answered by missmichelle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋