How does dperession affect a relationship?

Question

Do you find it difficult to communicate with the people in your life that you love the most, and find yourself cutting them out of your life? More specifically, have you had to end a relationship because of it, but couldn't bring yourself to communicate any further with that person even if they were offering support and help?? I've found myself in this situation, and don't know what to do to help him. I'm trying to be a friend to him, but he's not very responsive to me and I don't know if I should leave him be or keep offering support and letting him know I am there so he knows that I haven't abandoned him. I'm just having a hard time trying to figure out his unresponsiveness. He doesn't seem to want anything to do with me

I'm trying to be patient. We were going out for about 3 months when he told me it wouldn't work out for now because he had to fix things in his life so he could be happy. This all happened about 6 months ago. Still has not given a definite answer on the relationship, he just doesn't know what will happen. I've been offering support as a friend, and every once in a while I write an email to see how he's doing and to let him know I am there. Some he responds to, some he doesn't. He did respond to me last week, a few days after I had sent him an email encouraging him to get help. He said things have been painful and agonizing, and that the help he is getting isn't enough because his mind is still really uncomfortable. He plays in a band, and said that's all he really needs but everything else in his life still seems to be a disaster. I'm just looking for any input on his situation and what, if anything, I should do. I don't want to give up on him.....

I did consider that he was taking the cowardly way out, and even brought it up a few times through emails to him. But each time he assured me that I had nothing to do with it, I did not provoke anything, it was everything in his life he is exposed to that made him unhappy. He said he was not happy and that's all there is to it. He does have trust issues because his ex of 5 years cheated on him (which caused his depression in the first place), but he was honest with me about all of this in the beginning of our relationship. I completely believe him that he wasn't taking the easy way out, and that he just was not happy, period. I want to get through to him, but don't want to push him. I don't know if I should let him go at this point and see if he contacts me when he's ready to talk, or if I should keep in light contact now and again? He knows I'm always here for him

Answer 1

Many women are bought up to become fixers, or caretakers. You are in the toll of caretaker. He is stringing you along, pure and simple. This is wasting your time, energy, life, desires of a personal goal nature, and there is no payoff for you except in an imaginary future. it is living out of delusion and to save you soul, you MUST leave yesterday! Get the point. You can only lose.

Answer 2

Honey, I think it is not his problem, it is yours. Since that only means he is not interested in you and he doesn't really like you. So leave him alone and let go.