Right or wrong, I have been having sexual relationship with my half-brother since I was 15. I am now 27 and he is 29. Over the years we have been very involved and I've even had abortion twice after becoming impregnated by him (I've always used the pill but they are not 100%). Also, I've always felt guilty about the relationship but at the same time, I had been very sexually and emotionally attached to him. But now, I am getting married to this guy I love and I told my brother that we have to end the relationship. He quickly told me that he didn't want to end it and that he loves me (he even told me that we can move to Sweden and actually get married there since there is no such incest laws...). I told him I couldn't do that. Then, one thing led to another and he even went as far as to tell me that unless I breakup with my fiance, he would tell him and everyone else about our long history of relationship. I really don't know what to do....
2007-08-08 22:52:31 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
not judging you
but no matter what he does , tell him its over no matter what happens if he is that lousy a human being not to let you have a normal life he shouldn't be in your life at all
2007-08-08 23:07:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't even know how to begin with this one. Grow a backbone, you are a 27 year old woman, not a little girl. You say you feel guilty, yet you still do it. You need to stand up and assert yourself and say no more. You need to stop kidding yourself about your half-brother. If he loved you he would to what is better for you and let you go. You can not be together, stop deluding yourself and him. You must decide right now to have no more sex, EVER. For gods sake, you let this man blackmale you, make you have two abortions because you can not have children together because of genetics, and you are cheating on your fiance and convincing yourself that it is ok. There is no future with him. You may have a future with you fiance, but only if you come clean, because trust me, he will find out, and he will then tell everybody. IF you are honest and open, and get some help for yourself to get over your brother, you may have a future with him.
2007-08-08 23:09:59 · answer #2 · answered by Amie Z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not to sound like a complete jerk, but there are a few factors in this story that stick out like sore thumbs with me. First of all, why would you be TRYING to have a child with somebody that you already have what sounds like an unstable relationship with? You said you split up before, only to get back together. Do you honestly think that having a child with her is going to stablize your relationship? Second, why would you be TRYING to have a child with a woman that you're not married to? I realize you two were engaged, but what's the rush to have a child anyway? I don't understand why marriage is an afterthought these days with people who live together and have kids together. And third......if she already has a child from a previous relationship, and now says she found somebody new to have another child with, does this REALLY sound like marriage material to you? If your best friend told you that the chick he's been living with for the last year or two with the 5 year old kid wants to break up because she found somebody new to have another child with, what would you tell him? Chances are that deep down, those who truly care about you aren't going to be too upset over your break up with this woman. Especially your parents! I know it's tough my friend. Honestly I do. And NOTHING anybody says in here is going to make you feel any better. But hopefully in time you realize that despite whatever attachment you felt with this woman and her child, this is definitely for the best. Some of the biggest mistakes I have seen people make, is when they think that getting married or having children with the WRONG person is suddenly going to make everything right. Somewhere out there is a quality woman with values, morals, and a heck of a lot less baggage just waiting to meet somebody like you. You'll see.
2016-05-17 21:15:31 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the first place unless your related through your genes, your not committing incest.
If your still having relations with your half brother, you say your "in love" with this other guy, how can that be? either you aren't or, you are. If you are in love as you say, then tell your half brother to take a walk. Your going to have to explain this to your fiancee sooner or later, before he finds out from someone else because it sounds like your half brother is going to blab one way or the other.
If your fiancee doesn't understand now, about the abortions etc,. it's better now then later. Don't you think?
If he disapproves and, I'm thinking he will, it's much better to clear the air, then you can decide what to do about your half brother.
If you do find yourself alone, and I'm guessing you will, then get away from this half brother and forget him. Get far away like another city and, if necessary, another state, don't tell anyone where your going or why.
It's either this or let it all hang out and the cards fall where they may. He will make your life miserable I'm sure.
Once he finds someone else, he may forget you.
2007-08-08 23:04:17 · answer #4 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell you fiance' your self. If he finds out from your brother it will only be worse. Its bad either way but you need to be honest. You can not get married with big secrets like that one. Maybe he will understand maybe not. You have to let him decide what he wants to do.You just shouldn't hide it completely. If you tell him then your brother can't hang anything over your head anymore. Try some counseling.
2007-08-09 06:58:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly I must say "OMG". Now that I have said that I personally think you should cut ties with your half brother if he continues his threats. Honestly think of it like this would he tell "everyone" about the relationship? It would make him look as bad as you. Your both guilty of it so unless he is willing to take the onslaught of criticism and judgement he will not say anything. Really how low is he to threaten you like that is he so self centred that he would ruin your life to suit himself and his desires? If your partner loves you he will stand by you. I wish you luck.
2007-08-08 23:08:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be determined to face the truth. If your fiance loves you and you love him, too don't worry about your half brother telling the whole story to your fiance. How long can you live under this pressure? Be yourself and have faith in your love. Nothing odd will happen if you yourself narrate the whole story to your fiance prior to your half brother does so.
2007-08-08 23:01:46 · answer #7 · answered by sv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow this is a tough one..i dont envy your situation...this is realy all about your brother realizing that the two of you could never be together...but hes in love with you so he wont except that what other people think should stop the two of you from being together...hhhmmmm....i dont think he could tell your parents that i think hes bluffing just give it time and tell him if he loved you hed let you be happy and the two of you will always be family and share a bond and isnt family the most important thing?
2007-08-08 23:00:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hire a hitman get rid of him...
The trick is: Leave NO trace :-)
2007-08-08 23:42:02 · answer #9 · answered by CAN T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him tell your fiance. if your fiance really loves you, he whudn't care about your past.
2007-08-08 22:57:15 · answer #10 · answered by Cassie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋