How do I get this thought out of my head? It keeps replaying... Re-asking------?

Question

Yes, I am asking this question again. I'll tell you why at the end.

Ok... so usually every night, when I am laying in bed, I start thinking...

"what happens when we die?" And i usually end up imagining coming back as another person...... and so on...


THEN this though comes that is like this...

if we DO come back as a different person every time we die, then ONE DAY, in the not so near future, the world will end... because the sun will get bigger, and we wont be able to stand the heat. So basically, like... what happens...

there will be no more earth for us to come back to... we will be forever dead.

And it scares me really badly, because I love life.

It's so hard to explain...

Basically... im so scared of the day that i die, or the day when humans can no longer inhabit the earth!

SCARED!

The reason I am asking again, is because the people who answered seem to know me so well. Saying such things as, "you really, really need a girlfriend...”

Or “time for bed, kiddie.”

Well, since you know me so well, I would like to tell you a little about myself.

I am not a kid. I am 22 years old. My occupation is real estate. I sell Luxury condos, and Private estates. I make roughly 120,000 dollars per year. I have a fiancé. We have been together since our senior in high school. I also have a degree in business.

As you can see, I have my life pretty well in order, so please do not include your childish remarks, as they are completely inaccurate, and you’re just making yourself look foolish.


I appreciate anyone that can give me advice.

Answer 1

Oh-my-God you sound LIKE ME !

I'm 15, so quite a bit younger, but these thoughts just wouldn't leave me alone !!

I don't want to sound awful but like I think once you get to a certain sort of.. um... intelligence, you can't help but ask these questions.

But it's REALLY not worth it. That's what I learnt anyway.

You might completely disagree with me but I seem to find that whenever I'm stressed out or panicked about something which I find hard to deal with I just turn to other things and this thought pops up again in my mind !

And then I REALLY start to panic. Like, why we're here ? What happens when we die ? I will just be like nothing. A dead lump of space ... etc..

but now... I don't know. It's like I've finally accepted it. My Dad laughed at me when I started shaking with worry and said,
"Why do you care ? You'll be dead so it won't matter."

I guess this is quite true.

So yeah, the best thing to do is to forget it I guess, you WILL get over it ! But I also think that sometimes we come back to these circular thoughts whenever something else is bothering us which we don't want to deal with - our mind channels it into something else which panics us.

Anyway, I hope I was some tiny help but I probably wasn't !

I know this is stupid but it's probably something you'll come to accept. It's just one of those things.

Good luck :) !

Answer 2

I do have a background in psychology, but I'm speaking from the perspective of a person, NOT a clinician.

It sounds like these repititious thoughts are really bothering you. Rather than asking strangers (most of whom do not have the education to provide a solid answer) online, and if your thoughts are really as disruptive as they seem, you should schedule an appointment to talk to a therapist about it. Doing so would help you to explore when and why the thoughts first originated, why you have them at bedtime, and their relationship to other aspects of your life.

Actually, someone your age experiencing these types of dooming thoughts aren't as uncommon as you might believe. Many people have them, but are possibly able to more quickly resolve them or brush them aside than you're able to at this point in time. This doesn't mean that you're "crazy" or "nuts" or any other negative epithet for "mentally ill." It just means that for some reason, this issue bothers you more than it does others. I suggest that you talk to a professional about this so you can get on living a happy and healthy life.

Answer 3

You may notice that the world is emotionally immature. That explains the childishness. I don't give them attention unless I feel I can help them or they do something nice. I recommend this book and website. It has 64 free ebooks and one called "Emotional Intelligence." It's definitely for adults. It is the new mind shift and everyone needs to know about how to do it effectively as the emotions rule us otherwise.
Dreams are not meaningless and obviously this one is about fear of losing a great life, job or what now. Emotions are more powerful than thought unless understood. Your fiancee will thank me. It's sort of a "what women want' as a side effect. There are some good sites on near death experiences that are helpful to some extent. I imagine after life to be with the same thoughts as now without a body, leaving the world to your imagination and creation, as we do in our mind now, to some extent. Imagination is necessary to get outside ourselves, see where we can add to reality, be entirely objective and for pleasure. Understanding emotions integrates the left and right hemispheres, thought and emotion and brings peace, joy, higher functioning, better sales, better relationships and children don't annoy you anymore, you love them, to name a few from a surprisingly long list. I've gone on enough. Enjoy.

Answer 4

You are having deeply elemental thoughts which are one reason for people to adopt religious or spiritual beliefs in hopes of stopping them.

Since the question of "what happens after we die" can not be answered, our minds come up with all sorts of plausible and sometimes not so plausible possibilities.

One of those possibilities, or theories if you will, is the idea of rebirth, which you have clearly adopted already.

This adoption of that theory was actually one of your first steps towards "dealing" with the subject of death and afterlife.

You might go in several different directions of thought, usually either logic based or faith based.

Since you have already adopted the theory of rebirth, and that theory is one of faith and not pure logic, let's examine some other steps you might take.

On a faith-based level, you might seek out answers from religious/spiritual authorities. You will eventually encounter ideologies that incorporate concepts such as "eternal afterlife", usually in the presence or under guidance of a supreme deity ("God").

Often times this is enough for people to become more comfortable with their thoughts on afterlife - Hey, I'll spend eternity with a loving God. That's awesome.

Sometimes, however, this may just open up another question: what IS eternity?

This is a similar question as "What comes after death?" and cannot be answered. The concept of endless time/eternity can't really be processed by most human minds and is therefore just another roadblock to getting an answer.

Another spiritual, albeit not really religious thought, would be that after the world ends physically, human souls will still remain. Maybe in a place that we can't yet fathom ("ether" for example) or maybe in a physical place such as a different planet.

Again, the concept of eternity, endlessness, and nothingness is what boggles your and everyone elses mind.

There is no answer to this. There are only theories, ideologies, speculation, and wishful thinking.

Any and all religions and spiritual beliefs are all of the above, but unfortunately so are scientific theories because none can actually prove or verify the existence of an afterlife in the first place.

Speculate, yes. Hope and wish for, yes. Prove it, no.

There is no definite answer to your thoughts because none of us here have the capacity to show you what happens after we die.

We can't fathom the concept of "nothingness" so we come up with our theories. But is one of them true? All of them? None of them? If the latter, then what IS nothingness?

"There's nothing after death" is a scary statement because "nothing" can't be comprehended by our minds. Even if there's total blackness around us, we still have thoughts so that's not "nothing".

Your high level of intelligence will continue to throw these types of questions at you. You must come to the realization that at the present time there are no answers, or be tortured by these thoughts going forward.

You are too special to do that to yourself.

Answer 5

You're not alone. Death haunts us all sometimes. It's hard not to worry about it, especially before you fall asleep. Maybe becuase moments before sleep imitate what we believe moments before death would be like? Anyway, it's part of life to learn to accept death, as there is no way to avoid it. From the beginning people have struggled and come up with ways of coping. Hence we have various religions, spiritual beliefs, etc. You need to find something,or maybe someone? to help you cope. Maybe a religious or spiritual advisor, maybe just a therapist to hear you out. You cannot ignore death, for it comes to us all. What happens after is the greatest mystery of life, and the reson for myraid beliefs, like reincarnation, or heaven, or nothingness. But in wasting nights in torment over death, you lose the beauty that is life. The fact the life will end is part of what makes it so beautiful. I heard(read) a saying once, "You are never be more lovely than you are now, because you are doomed." New food for your nighttime thoughts, mayhap.

Answer 6

OK you feel that we come back as a different person.
And when the time comes that Earth is gone .... well there is a whole universe of stars and planets out there. who said that we only come back to this planet?
To put your mind at ease and maybe to answer some of your questions and probably some that you have not asked yet I would suggest that you read all three books
( Conversations with God ) by Neil Donald Walsh. No it is not the Bible but I found that It Fits a lot of the things that I have thought and it has answered a lot of my questions.
Just be open minded and give it a chance.

Answer 7

Well Josh, this sounds a bit obsessive, and you should maybe think about how good your life is and what you are going to do with your next 80 years or so. The sun won't go super-nova or anything on us for another, what, say 50 million years?

Being scared of death is a huge waste of your time. Focus on something good, and enjoy your life. FIRST WE LIVE, THEN WE DIE. If you refuse to live for fear of dying, you may as well already be dead.

I understand - I had therapy on this subject!

Answer 8

The question of our overall humanity is one that bodes heavy on every person's mind, my friend. Don't feel about about asking the 'Big Question'.

However, it is one without a definite answer. You could look for one in science, religion, or right here on Yahoo!, but there simply isn't one.

The grave nature of the concept of death is something we all must come to face, but those who face death with fear or insecurity are usually those who hold the most regrets. As foreboding as it might seem to be, the best way to deal with death, rather then brooding about it before you fall asleep, is work to live the life that live now; the solid, concrete presence you hold today, to it's fullest potential. You're a lucky person, in that you seem to be successful, and because of this, have enough leisure to explore the things that might make your presence here more gratifying for you, however that might be. Don't focus on material things - do what fills your heart with true joy. Pursue your deepest longings and fantasies. Bungee-jump, sky-dive, or bicycle cross-country. Learn to paint. Commit some of your time to helping those in need - maybe even vacation in Africa, helping those who really needs it. Work for something that you feel will be truly beneficial to the generations that come after you. Write a novel. Whatever makes you whole; whatever makes you feel like you've given more, done more, expressed yourself more, do it. It could even be something so common as having (or adopting) a few kids, and giving them a good upbringing.

If you feel like you've experienced the joys of the world, and given more joy back to it then harm when you face the big unknown in a couple of decades, you will be much more ready to take it on. Be it reincarnation, heavenly eternity, or simply stark nothingness, you will know for sure that the life you've lived in the world you know was one worth living, and that you've made it more worth living to others in it.

You can never stop asking yourself that question, but if you live to the fullest, you can at least come to be satisfied with never knowing the answer.

Answer 9

Have you tried reading about Buddha and his way?
I think better scientific knowledge about the observable world may give you a respite. You should ask yourself what are we doing in this world. Ask yourself why do you have a girlfriend. Why do you need one? Ask yourself what are all living beings doing on this earth. What is the purpose. what is the motive. Once you answer these questions yourself after 'observation' and 'analysis' and you are able to put some hypothesis and verify those then you will understand the purpose of death. hopefully then the fear of death will go away.
I am not too much afraid of death. I am not afraid of decease or ageing or poverty. I am not afraid of suffering. Because I have asked myself a lot of questions and answered them to my satisfaction.
Tonight, in the bed, ask yourself what is death.

Answer 10

Frankly, I worry about security-seekers that feel they shouldn't have to die alone and therefore believe they have a right to take several people out with them. After living such responsible lives, pillars of society and all that bunk, doesn't the world *owe* them Yeah suuuure