Im 22 and I want a baby, is that wrong?

Question

I have been in a wonderful relationship with a wonderful man for about a month now!! We met in April! Its going great and We ARE in love!! We want to have a baby(hell it was his idea) and we've been trying!! I have been skipping so many pills that I just stopped taking them!! We both love kids( I worked @ a daycare for 3 yrs) so I have a lot of expereince!! Were gonna get married within the next couple of yrs we just don't want to wait to have this baby!! Is that wrong? Any suggestions would help as long as there respectful!! THANKS:)

We've actually known each other for 4 months!! We got to know each other alot before we decided to committ to a serious relationship!! Just to make things clearer for the 1s who said to wait b/c Ive only known him 4 a month!! Ive always wanted to be younger when I had kids and if we were meant to be whats the wait?

We've know each other for 4 months people, just dating for 1.:)

Answer 1

It's not wrong that you want to have a baby at 22 years old, however, I find it a bit distrubing that you feel ready to have a baby with a man you've only been with for a month! How do you know you're in love? I was in love with SEVERAL different men at 22 years old. I got married to a man I knew for 6 years prior...by then, I really knew I was in love. I was 24.

Is there any particular reason why you need to rush into having a child right now? You have plenty of time, and I'm confused as to why people put marriage off because they're scared of commitment, but they're willing to jump in the sack and have a baby with someone they hardly know, and they're now going to be legally tied to that person for 18 years because of it...if that isn't commitment, I don't know what is! Why don't you give your relationship time to grow, blossom, and mature before you have a baby with this man? You honestly could decide next month he's all wrong and he's not the one for you. If you're "knocked up" and I use that term loosely, you are now stuck with him...like it or not.
People like you make me angry. I've been married now to my best friend for 5 years, and we are in a loving, committed relationship and again, we're MARRIED....we've had trouble TTC for years, and we are finally pregnant. I made damn sure I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this man before I had a child with him...I will not allow my child to grow up in a broken home.
If you do go ahead and make a baby, please, marry the father. You owe that to your kid.

Answer 2

I don't think its wrong u wanna have a baby, but working at a daycare is not a 24hr thing. I did it for 1 1/2 yrs when I was 19. Things are very different when its urs all day.

4 months is not very long 2 make a life long decision. U know sometimes as females we think we r in love but its only lust.
I've been married for about 5 yrs now and I would not change it for anything. I got married at 20. So if the love is really there whats holding you all back from marriage and just having one happy family.

But again if u all have talked about it and feel that its a good time, then why not. But do know that if he changes his mind and doesn't wanna be a dad anymore, U can't, ur a mommy for life.

I hope everything works out for the best in both of your lives (hopefully 2gether 4ever).

Answer 3

OK, here goes...I knew my first husband for 2 years before I married him, and we were married for 19 miserable years, and had 4 wonderful kids. I started having my children when I was 21, so your age is not an issue. The marriage I'm in now is VERY happy. and guess what? We met only 3 months before we were married!! We've been together for 5 years now, and I've never felt closer to a man than I do to him. He is not just my husband, he's my best friend. If you truly feel that way about your man, then, I say go for it!! Being an old fart,(I'm 49), I still think you should be married first...not cuz I'm a prude, but because of insurance issues, and, I speak from experience when I say it's tons easier to deal with schools, doctors, etc, when you all have the same last name. (a lot less explaining).
It sounds like you've already made up your minds, so I wish you the best of luck and lots of love.

Answer 4

Hmmm...see I would say wait to have the baby b/c you really don't know if you will be together down the road and get married....honestly....I know you feel in love right now and after about 4-5 months of knowing each other this could just be puppy love....I was with someone for 2 years and I got pregnant (not trying) and we ended up splitting b/c "he didn't like my parents" I think that was a load of bull but I was 19 and stuck with a baby on my own....it was hard but....I would suggest you still wait....I've been with a guy for 3 years now and we are in as much love as we were day 1 now I know he's the one I want a baby with.....Even if you don't want to wait make sure he is serious about wanting a kid and not just the idea of cumming in you unprotected.

Answer 5

If it is true that you are in love than both of you would be willing to wait until later in the relationship to start having children. Having a baby is a really big deal and the child deserves to have two parents in it's life. You cannot and do not know that you will be together (and in love) in a couple months from now. Wait for a year and if you are still together and truly in love then maybe start trying then. Personally I think you should be married 1st. That is usually how it is supposed to work. Just an opinion and a suggestion like you asked for.

Answer 6

I had a friends who's boy friend of a month also told her he wanted an baby and guess what when she did get pregnant he was no where to be found and still to this days has nothing to do w/ his son. I also got pregnant 6 months after I met my husband and was married to him around the same time. I realized later that I did not know him at all. We are now divorced and I raise my 2 year old alone. Not to say that your boyfriend is like this but you just never know after only knowing someone for that short of time. Good luck. I on the other hand don't thing 22 is two young to have a child if you are in an established relationship!

Answer 7

Hold up you want to wait to get to know each other before committing to a serious relationship (marriage) Uh I may only be 17 but I think that having a child together is pretty serious stuff. I mean say you guys don't work out you can't just go your seperate ways. You have a child and that is a big responsibility. Quit being so selfish and think of the child that you are trying to concieve. How can you even think about having a child together when you can't even seriously consider getting married! Oh wait, yes you can but maybe in a couple years when you know each other better. Well maybe in a couple years when you know each other better you can consider having a child togher.

This isn't just your life your talking about, its an innocent childs aswell. Seriously have you even thought about where the child will live, with you? with dad? are you planning to live toghether? What are you religious views...will it be raised christian, catholic, jewish? What is your stand on spanking? What if you and your boyfriend break up? Then what! What happens to the child? Grow up, your talking about bringing a child into what I see as an unstable relationship.

You say you love him, but Love isn't enough. Babies are expensive are you ready for that financial burden? Oh yeah and don't forget that you no longer get to go out with your friends whenever you feel like it. You wanna go out you have to call a babysitter! Heck call me I could use the extra cash.

All I'm saying is that this is a big responsiblity, and you two have not been together very long. Your talking about bringing another life into this world. I can't stop you, but I hope you have given this some serious thought.

Answer 8

It is never wrong to have those natural feelings of wanting to have a baby. I think it is part of being a woman. In your case, I think its part of being young...and naive. I say this out of love and understanding. I am 28 now, and back then I had some of the same feelings you have now. However, looking back on it, a woman's perspective changes. Now, I simply think in terms of being able to provide a stable environment for both myself and my not yet concieved child. I am so much more appreciating that I did wait. Life would have been so much more difficult if I'd have gotten pregant at the beginning of my relationship. For one thing, you will miss that incredible opportunity to have a chance to grow together as a couple. Once you have the baby, your focus will be on the baby, not on yourselves as a couple. If you lose that time to strengthen your bond with each other first, it will be bad to test out your relationship under the hardships of caring for a new one. My husband and i have been through a lot...we met when we were 20. I honestly don't know if we would still be together if we'd have gotten pregnant right away. We wouldn't have had the chance to mature and grow, and mind you we still have a lot to learn..
Be sure you've had the non-romantic baby making talk with your boyfriend. Do either one of you have health insurance? Where will you live once you become pregnant? How will you pay for child care cost? Can you afford the costs of a new baby? If you or your boyfriend can't answer these questions, don't expect these issues to magically resolve themselves in the delivery room.

Lots of luck to you

Answer 9

There is nothing wrong with having a baby while you are young as long as you are reasy to change your life completly and willing to give up all that you do now to focus you life on a baby , because that is what happens! Only being together four months is a trouble spot you two have not experienced any hardships to your relationship yet , your still in the honeymoon phase of your relationship , Personally I would wait .

Answer 10

Its good that you both love children and when you get married you will most likely be good parents.But really one month is a bit to soon dont you think.Take time to get to know him and enjoy time with him,After all you have a baby now and your relationship doesnt work,look whos holding the baby.And Im not saying that disrespectfuly,it may not bother you to raise a child on your own. But just enjoy each other before you have a child,And if you cant wait then move the wedding up.