I just told a mate I liked him, I think he'd rather I said his family were dead. Help?

Question

Ok, here goes.
I am 17 and I'm gay, though I've only told a few very close friends. I had my eye on this guy at School for a while now (We're both in Year 11) and I really genuinely beleived he was gay. He always dressed very well, alot of people suspected it, he spoke nicely and was just a really nice guy. Most people at School had suspicians he was gay, it wasn't just me.

So after a few days of getting to know him better I decided to tell him I was gay and had feelings for him. So, as he walked off to the bus, I told him I was gay and sort of liked him.

Honestly, his face went bright red, I thought he was going to hit me. I said, "I'm sorry if I'm wrong, just tell me to F&*& off". He said "Let's go with that" and walked away.

Right now, I feel terrible, sad and scared. I really thought he was gay, maybe he is? I am just so scared to go to School tomorrow. It was right at the end of the day. What have I done?

I'd really appreciate your advice, thoughts and comments. Thnks

Answer 1

I believe there is a scale from 1-10. If you are a 1 you are straight, if you're a 5 you are bi, and if you are a 10 you are gay. He sounds like a 2 or 3 in denial. Better not to deal with those.

Answer 2

All you have done is ask someone out and get turned down. That's ALL. There's a chance that he may spread info about you if he was angry, but it doesn't sound like it. Seems more like he was just embarrased; this may have happened to him before.

He may or may not be gay, that's not really the issue though. Obviously at the moment, he's not into dating a guy. So you just take it as a learning experience, gather your closest friends around you and go on with your highschool experience.

BTW,

BRAVO! That's a brave step for anyone.

Answer 3

Many people are dealing with issues with their sexuality.

People can be gay friend or gay tolerant but feel uncomfortable when another gay person is hitting on them. For a well dressed nice guy, being called gay all the time, probably makes him feel uncomfortable. So it is more about the fact he doesn't know how to respond.

Be honest and honest people will respect and appreciate your honesty and dishonest people will hate you....don't worry about it.

Maybe as time goes you need to take your time and find out the facts before jumping. Many people, especially teenagers, find anything to do with sex and sexuality confusing.

Answer 4

Hey. I just wanna say, you are one of the bravest people I've heard of. What you did was great. Living in denial and with regrets is definitely not an option for a teen like you. Just go where the tide takes you. And if you get hurt in the process, remember, it's okay. You still have a long life ahead of you, and one small unsavory incident like this will be forgotten sooner or later. If the guy continues to behave hostilely towards you, just forget about him and move on. If not, give it your best shot! Good luck, man.

Answer 5

Well, don't feel sad, because you did nothing wrong. Your fears may be well placed, because there is the danger that he may spread your closest kept secret in retaliation, but I doubt that.

Now you really should have looked for something in common other than the fact that you and he are gay.

If he is straight don't feel bad, you liked the guy, there is no crime in that.

Remind him that you are still the same person, but this is just a little bit more of you.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

I'm quite certain he's not gay.
Listen man- this is a valuable learning experiance for you. Just give yourself a little time- this will pass. Everything is going to be alright- hold your head up at school. You took a risk and I commend you for that- no reason at all to feel terrible.
Next time make sure the dude is gay before you inform him you like him.

Answer 8

You should feel proud of yourself that you took such a bold step. It may not have turned out the way you would like, but hey, there are plenty of fish in the sea (and lots of them are gay).

Answer 9

if people find out. so what?..whats the big deal..everyone has their falls and has been rejected at one time or another..your brave because you told him..you never know, he might like you too..if he doesnt and just wants you to **** off, then it just wasnt meant to be..there will always be someone else out there...dont be sad or scared....expect the worst and hope for the best..U DID NOT DO N E THING WRONG...good luck :)

Answer 10

Just relax kiddo. You'll get over the fact that he doesn't feel the same way you do about him, we have all been there! Tell him you still want to be friends and what not, if you still want to. Or if you honestly think he is gay tell him if he is it is OK and if he isn't then that's OK too.