Why do I keep getting the urge to have another baby?

Question

I have a 3 1/2 year old girl and a 1 1/2 year old boy. When my daughter was about my son's age, their father and I planned our son. We divorced and I am now remarried to my best friend of almost 11 years now (my, time flies!). We were wed on May 13th of this year. I've been getting the urge, almost a need, to have another baby but I know I'm not ready for one and would like to take more time for my son to grow. He was born with IS, and thank God he was one of the 10% to outgrow it and be completely normal. I'm afraid of having another baby with IS because I don't even know how I could have caused it to my son. The doctor's never found a cause for it, and I keep thinking it's something I did, although they told me it's not. Why do I keep getting this urge that is so strong? I don't want to take the chance of having another one with IS, but I just feel strongly that I want another one. Yeah, I'm confused. Can somebody help me figure this out?

Answer 1

You want them so bad because children are a gift from God. Allah said in his Holy Qur'an (Soorat Al Kahaf (the Cave):

[18.46] Wealth and children are an adornment of the life of this world; and the ever-abiding, the good works, are better with your Lord in reward and better in expectation.

I suggest you go ahead & have a baby. They are blessings from the Almighty. They are joy in this life that you should not hold yourself back from. My wife & I have been trying to conceive for 2 years now, but nothing yet. May Allah bless us with a child soon. Take care Sister.

Answer 2

Maybe in the back of your mind you're thinking that 2 children couldn't keep your last marrage together, so maybe having a child with this wonderful, suporting person you've just wed will make everything complete and keep him with you. This is only a theory becuase I read too much & I don't know your situation well enough to judge otherwise. Althought this has just occurred to me. The fact that you are finally happy, after so much and so many trials, you've found the man that is right for you. You want to try again & be everything for him and create the perfect little family with him. Or Your hormones are out of wack and your body is craving the chemical high it receives when you are pregnant. Or maybe the attention you receive when you're pregnant. You're addicted to it and need that high again. Just some theories. Good luck. I hope you have another. The IS thing is not something you can predict your next could be perfectly healthy.

Answer 3

Your human. My first child was 3 weeks early and my second was 6 weeks early and now I want a third. I get no rest, I am constantly tired and know that I would not be able to carry to term and yet I desperately want another one, NOW!

To give my next baby the best chance I can I am waiting until my son who is now 2 1/2 it fully trained and sleeping well in his own room and I am rested and taking the best possible care of myself before I become pregnant.

Call your doctor or do some research on IS and see if there is anything that you can do do help to prevent it and then talk with your husband and go for it if it was what you really want.

Good luck!

Answer 4

Find a hobby your passionate about or Do what I did which was a little crazy but it helped i incubated and raised baby ducks. Dont let your emotions over rule your logic if you want another one set a date in a few months from now to look forward to try for another and keep busy in the mean time and dont worry about the IS look it up and see what the cause is if its genetic or whatever and way your options

Answer 5

You like to be a mother and love kids, it is natural to want to have more kids. Their is nothing wrong with it. Allah (swt) tells is this is our duty and their is nothing better then kids as you know. :) Plus I am sure you want one with your new love.

My husband & I just had our first son 2 weeks ago mashAllah and he is already talking about having another in 6 months and so is my in laws. The last thing on my mind really is more kids.

Do not worry and think the worst, that is the devil whispering to you making you doubt. Anything is possiable when you ask Allah and he will make things good for you so think the best always and stop letting shaytan get to you like he is.

Answer 6

I have 4 kids and my wife still gets the urge to have another baby. I believe it's just that motherly urge to have the little baby again to raise from birth, especially in the 1st year of the infants life when he/she is so dependent on momma.

Answer 7

hey beautiful

salams...

this is prob a feeling that god is giving you.... allah may know that this child yo are going to have will be alright.. he tested you and you pased he might want to give you a reward for that...

i dont know for sure but this is a posibility!!!!!

you like kids?? inshallah you wil get all the ones you want and inshallah they wil all be good and healthy !! keep your faith in allah and everything wil work out for the best.. allah dosnt give you more then you can handle so.. whateverhappens is the right thing.. and you would be making hasanat (deeds) for the child you are taking care of !!

i know cause i have been in the same situation... may allah be with you....

all the best

Answer 8

Have another one. You have to let fate take its course. I am sure your new baby will be as beautiful, happy and healthy like your first 2. Don't go on with the what ifs as you don't know, if it is right between you and your new hubby, what are you waiting for!!!