New parent in need of HELP!?

Question

My 9 week old cries whenever I put him down. Even when daddy is home from work and holding him he cries and cries and then finally settles down, but then may scream again. He is fed and changed. I breastfeed and it seems that that is the only thing to immediately calm him down is to put him on a boob. Baby cries when I am in the shower (I shower at night), he will eventuall tire.
I play with him during the day and he smiles but if I leave him to long (<10 minutes) by himself he fusses and cries.
I am at my wits end. I may be returing to work soon and leave him with family, I also want Daddy to enjoy the baby, without too much trouble. Baby is calm now daddy is rocking him, but

Why does is cry to the point of mad panic when he is fed changed and burped?

He will nurse, drift to sleep then if daddy is here I will pass him off, then shortly he will cry and then scream. Only a boobie or persistence rocking him will calm him down. Why?

I play with him during the day, talk with him sing to him. He smiles coos and tries to laugh. I give him lots of attention, but if I try to put him in the swing he pouts and gives the sad face and then starts to cry.
I have to keep him with me in the sling if I want to get anything done.
During the evening however his mood changes, he is much more cranky and does that grunting whine.

Sometimes he takes the paci, othertimes he spits it out. I never know what he will tolerate.

Answer 1

You need to dicuss this with your babys doctor.......How long has this been going on? Maybes its the babys formula, maybe its Colic........the best way to solve the promblem is to talk to your doctor cuz obviouisly he is unhappy about something and when u r rocking him his gets a little comfort from u because u r his mommy and got that bond with him, especially since u breastfeed

Answer 2

IT could very well be during the evening babies tend to tire a lot easier and be much more cranky during the PM hours. Or he may just be a n attention hog like my daughters are. It is ok to let him fuss it out it wont hurt him. A crying baby can really put you in a place of exhaustion and confusion and wish the baby would just calm down for 5 minutes so make sure you give him some alone time to cry it out and you have some me time to deal with the stress of a crying baby.
MY daughter is almost 6 weeks old and she loves attention so much that she does the same thing whenever she is put down she cries until someone picks her back up and usually she isn't calm until she gets on the boob also. Just try to deal with it one step at a time. You might also want to tell his doctor about it because he may have Colic...because I've read that colicy babies tend to cry at least 3 hours a day almost non stop at least 3 days a week and also it is usually in the PM hours...so if he is colicky and his doctor confirms it I do believe there are things you can give him for that...such as gripe water and whatnot...but I would ask his doctor before you give him anything just to be sure.
Good Luck been there done that almost 3 yrs ago and doin it now = )

Answer 3

Oh dear, he's getting to an age now where he knows, if I cry mummy will come and thats what I like best.
Firstly, he shouldn't need feeding more than every 3-4hrs even if he latches on. If he feeds well each time, then he shouldn't need anything inbetween. Secondly have you thought about a dummy when he wants to be on the boob but its not feed time yet? Or to settle him when crying in bed etc... They are a godsend and as long as you manage them, he won't have it forever.
Secondly he could have colic or bad wind. Does he draw his knees up all the time or burp a lot? Make sure he is latching on correctly so he is not sucking in air. Burp after each feed as well. Have you tried a colic relief medicine? You can buy natural ones that you give them (just a few drops) before a feed to settle their tummy and help them burp/fart it out. Keep him in a more raised position with pillows or a play mat to help this also.

Thirdly, have you tried to settle him into a set routine yet? You may have realised his sleep patterns by now and how long between decent feeds.

If you can't get anything to work, take him to your local child health nurse and get him a once over to see if he has anything else wrong. He could have an earache or sore throat that you might not be able to see.

Most babies go through a transition phase at about this age and it will get better with a set routine and a dummy for when you just can't handle it anymore.

Good luck

Answer 4

I had the same problem when my son was born except for the fact he would only calm down for my mom and talk about upsetting and stressful. i thought i did something wrong and it just made me feel even worse like i was a bad mother. but, he eventually grew out of it and it was because babies can tell when people are stressed and that could be why yours is only calm when you have him. It could be that he is colicy (gassy) and feeding him settles his stomach. You can buy gas drops for babies at any walmart to give him, but always ask a doctor forst because that is one thing I am not. Then, get him on a feeding schedule every three to four hours and gradually increase it as he gets old enough for cereal and baby food that way it is easier to keep him fed when you return to work later on. Trust me it WILL get better. As for the stress of not wanting daddy, that will eventually fade too and you will have a nice and wonderfully functional family to enjoy. Hope the info works and CONGRATULATIONS on the new baby.

Answer 5

My guess would be colic, but sometimes we can just never figure out what is really causing our babies to cry!!

Too young for separation anxiety... this is the short answer from the American Academy of Pediatrics:
**Between the ages of eight and twelve months, your child sometimes may seem like two separate babies. First there’s the one who’s open, affectionate, and outgoing with you. But then there’s another who’s anxious, clinging, and easily frightened around unfamiliar people or objects. Some people may tell you that your child is fearful or shy because you’re “spoiling” her, but don’t believe it.** http://www.aap.org/publiced/BK0_SeparationAnxiety.htm

great colic website:
http://www.colichelp.com/
**The generic label of colic is defined by it's symptoms rather than a particular cause. It is believed to affect about 25% of babies who exhibit uncontrollable crying over three hours a day and at least three days a week.**

Answer 6

remember, you are all he knows right now, and the world is a very scary place!

put him to the breast whenever he cries, and you may need to let him drift to sleep this way.

Try giving him Mylicon drops. even if you dont *think* hes gassy, you never know, and it cant hurt. this did wonders for my baby. he didnt cry at all except for when he was pooping or having gas. your baby sounds like he may be a little colicy, which is fine, Mylicon will help that too!

try having your husband hum so the baby can feel the vibrations when laying on his chest.

all i can say is just keep giving your baby love, and if you are doing your best, then that is all you really can do! love is all your baby wants and needs =]

Answer 7

Could he have colic? Babies with colic cry a lot and calmed by being held, breastfed, or motion. My little sister was extremely colicky and was only happy when in constant motion. Have you talked with your doctor? If not I'd make an appointment pretty soon. I'm pretty sure they also have over the counter medicine for it. My son had a slight case of it and sometimes I could tell he was gassy by his body movements and facial expressions. Also if you lay your head on their belly sometimes you can hear it.

Hang in there it gets much easier after age 3 :)

Answer 8

Sounds like a classic case of seperation anxiety hun. My son went through the same thing when I went back to work. It got to the point my husband called my cell phone telling me to come home and take the baby to the doctor since he wouldn't stop crying. As soon as I walked in the door and picked him up he'd stop.
Best thing to do at this point is possibly introduce a binkie and persist in helping him adjust to other people comforting him. You may need to leave the room before he will settle down but after a week or so he will adjust that other people will provide for him as well as mommy does.
It's normal!

Answer 9

He's probably got Colic. Sometimes babies cry for no reason, other times there's a reason but it takes us parents forever to figure it out. A pacifier isnt for everyone but if he's only calm when he's nursing maybe you could try offering him a pacifier to see if it helps him soothe himself when he's not nursing. When my daughter was born and all she did was cry I tried EVERYTHING , including a pacifier which I always said I wouldnt give . As luck turned out it was her formula giving her gas and she hated the paci anyway. Now my youngest who's 13 months loves the paci. Go figure.

Answer 10

Do you think he needs to be worn in a baby sling? Some babies need a lot of movement to feel content, I read in a book where the doctor who wrote it said that for 9 months in the womb, your baby was rocked gently as you moved about your normal day. It takes 9 months after birth for your baby's ears/sense of balance to really kick in for himself, so when you carry him about, that really feels like the best place for you baby to be. My baby loved his swing, and stroller rides, plus I would hold him while I slowly did my step aerobics on/off the step bench while watching tv. Good luck, I know crying babies can be frustrating since your trying so hard to figure out what they're trying to tell you!